Tales of Outwittery

FullChoke · February 12, 2011, 10:31:12 AM

Here's where you can enter your stories, embellished as much as your conscience can live with, about how you, against all earthly odds, managed to fiendishly outwit the Supreme Majestic Overlord of the Spring Woods!

FullChoke

Jay · February 12, 2011, 08:22:55 PM

Not a lot of reponse on this one. I think the Turkeys are kicken butt on this group.

chatterbox · February 12, 2011, 08:34:07 PM

Quote from: Jay on February 12, 2011, 08:22:55 PM
Not a lot of reponse on this one. I think the Turkeys are kicken butt on this group.

FullChoke · February 12, 2011, 08:57:33 PM

Quote from: Jay on February 12, 2011, 08:22:55 PM
Not a lot of reponse on this one. I think the Turkeys are kicken butt on this group.

The problem is that we don't write FICTION, or need to, Dr. Suess. But, for your sake, when we get going we will be sure to use single syllable words to make it easier for you!

FC

Jay · February 12, 2011, 10:03:53 PM

Quote from: FullChoke on February 12, 2011, 08:57:33 PM
Quote from: Jay on February 12, 2011, 08:22:55 PM
Not a lot of reponse on this one. I think the Turkeys are kicken butt on this group.

The problem is that we don't write FICTION, or need to, Dr. Suess. But, for your sake, when we get going we will be sure to use single syllable words to make it easier for you!

FC-Ex Raider stuck with guys shooting p shooters.

Thankfully they make guns to fit a bunch of guys, who are too short to be allowed on the adult rides at the Fair.

3" 870 Shell Shucker · February 13, 2011, 09:46:38 AM

I think Jay wants to be on our team. He's posting more on this forum than we are.

OLE RASPY · February 13, 2011, 09:49:32 AM

Quote from: 3" 870 Shell Shucker on February 13, 2011, 09:46:38 AM
I think Jay wants to be on our team. He's posting more on this forum than we are.

Jay wants to be on every team.

Jay · February 13, 2011, 09:53:40 AM

Quote from: 3" 870 Shell Shucker on February 13, 2011, 09:46:38 AM
I think Jay wants to be on our team. He's posting more on this forum than we are.

That's cause you guys are boring. I thought I'd whack the Hornets nest to see what happens

By the way, I acutually did that to show my cousin how fast I was, and wouldn't get stung. Where I screwed up was not taking, how slow SHE was into the equation. That was ugly for her, not me, until my dad found out what I did. Then my lumps equaled hers.

FullChoke · February 16, 2011, 11:41:44 AM

I first met King Tut on public land in Northern California. He was well known and greatly respected far and wide for his incredible ability to find the weakest link in every hunters armor and exploit it for his own survival. California did not allow afternoon hunting during the time that I first met him. I crawled up to a ridge overlooking a meadow and spotted him strutting in the middle of it surrounded by 10 hens and 2 jakes. I didn't need the binoculars to see how thick his beard was. He was the King and he was holding court! I watched him for 2 hours until he worked his way up onto the opposite ridge right at sunset. Finally he gobbled two long, throaty proclamations of his unchallenged royalty and I started making plans right then.

The next morning I made my way under the cloak of darkness across the open meadow 1-1/2 hours before sunrise. I sneaked up onto the grassy ridge and could barely see the outline of a big black oak tree. I was about 100 yards up the ridge from where I had heard him gobble the night before. I set my hen decoy out about 30 yards from the oak tree and eased over to sit down against it and wait for the morning festivities to start. Just before I sat down, I stopped and something told me to look around. I looked all around and then looked up the tree. There, looking straight down at me, was a giant bird and much smaller one! King Tut and a courtesan! He stuck his head out and clucked a deep guttural question, "What are you?" I froze. He clucked several more times as I tried to figure out what I was going to do next. Directly his clucking calmed down, and finally stopped. I stood motionless for 10 minutes to let him fall back asleep. Slowly, I just turned around and sat down right below him.

The sun began changing the night sky into a warm peach color and the diurnal players started warming up for their show. A coyote yipped down on the other side of the meadow and the two jakes started gobbling at him. Hens started waking up and clucking all around me. Directly a large, warm splat hit the ground right next to me and another one hit the ground right on my other side. The rattling gobble that jarred my teeth from right above my head was unmistakable. It's good to be the King. I was hoping that he would drop off of the roost and introduce himself to the dewy baby doll making eyes at him from about 30 yards away from his boudoir. Hello Baby. No such luck! When he sailed out of the tree, the anchor rope hanging off his chest was simply ludicrous! But, he was sailing and didn't hit ground until well out in the meadow. Other turkeys bailed out of the trees, stopped by to chat up the new chick and left because they didn't know how to communicate with this stuck-up broad.

I had 3 other very close encounters with his Majesty that year, and he managed to escape the lead headache each time. I had the drop on Tut in that tree that morning and could have lowered the boom on him, but there is not enough money in this world that could have convinced me to end his glorious reign without giving him a fair chance. I don't know that he was ever shot, I want to believe that he wasn't.

FullChoke

CB on the run · February 16, 2011, 12:28:57 PM

Wow, good read. Tom Kelly look out.

CB

Jay · February 19, 2011, 06:41:10 AM

Try setting up a little farther from Roost next time

harvester · February 24, 2011, 02:51:33 PM

[I thought I'd whack the Hornets nest to see what happens

By the way, I acutually did that to show my cousin how fast I was, and wouldn't get stung. Where I screwed up was not taking, how slow SHE was into the equation. That was ugly for her, not me, until my dad found out what I did. Then my lumps equaled hers.

[/quote]

timbrhuntr · February 24, 2011, 03:16:00 PM

Quote from: Jay on February 12, 2011, 08:22:55 PM
Not a lot of reponse on this one. I think the Turkeys are kicken butt on this group.

I thought this area wast to post stories about our kills that we make this year 2011. Not to make up stories like Jay will need to.

Jay · February 24, 2011, 11:45:32 PM

Quote from: timbrhuntr on February 24, 2011, 03:16:00 PM
Quote from: Jay on February 12, 2011, 08:22:55 PM
Not a lot of reponse on this one. I think the Turkeys are kicken butt on this group.

I thought this area wast to post stories about our kills that we make this year 2011. Not to make up stories like Jay will need to.

Post stories about your kills, is exactly why I'm here to fill in all the open spaces.

'post

timbrhuntr · February 25, 2011, 07:41:35 PM

Quote from: Jay on February 24, 2011, 11:45:32 PM
Quote from: timbrhuntr on February 24, 2011, 03:16:00 PM
Quote from: Jay on February 12, 2011, 08:22:55 PM
Not a lot of reponse on this one. I think the Turkeys are kicken butt on this group.

I thought this area wast to post stories about our kills that we make this year 2011. Not to make up stories like Jay will need to.
Post stories about your kills, is exactly why I'm here to fill in all the open spaces.

'post

Thats okay you don't need to post your little bird here if you get one, it probably won't break our top 10 anyways

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