This morning's reading, and throughout the week, particularly Wednesday, I have been guided to this topic for today. I honestly believe one of the most relevant things we use or misuse in our relationships is communication. Communication is a difficult thing, and is easily misunderstood, but also it is difficult to hide.
Wednesday I was running late to a meeting at the bank, due a last minute discovery of some papers being incorrectly labeled. I had to run back in the house, and edit them. As I'm running out the door, my wife asks me if I'm wearing a suit, and I replied one word, loudly, "NO! while at the same time abruptly pulling the door to, and doing a Starsky and Hutch move across her car into my truck. I was backing out of the carport, and noticed the back door opening, realizing at the same time she had picked up on my worries. I affirmed with the truck rolling backward, and the front truck window moving down "I'm gonna be late!!!" And in a puff of smoke, I was gone.
I learned later after returning from the meeting, my version of the above, was misinterpreted, and she was REALLY, REALLY, worried about me. She voiced the manner in which I replied "No" and my other ways of communicating through voice tone, facial expressions, and gestures, and actions was in a manner of anger, and worry. The manner in which I replied I was running late, to her, was in a way she had never heard me speak, a way of intense anger.
I will not argue or deny her interpretation of my actions. But, I honestly thought at first, she was mistaken. However, in reflection of the events and a few days passing, I realize my wife knows me better than my own self, and her interpretations, are her interpretations. I may only take ownership of me, and in doing so, and looking back, I was angry about not checking the papers until the last minute, and I was worried I would be late, as it would show poorly upon myself to the bank president.
Our scripture for today parallels the above, and is taken from James.
James 3:1-12(NIV)
Taming the Tongue
3 Not many of you should become teachers, my fellow believers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly. 2 We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check.
3 When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. 4 Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. 5 Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. 6 The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one's life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.
7 All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, 8 but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.
9 With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God's likeness. 10 Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be. 11 Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? 12 My brothers and sisters, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water.
WOW!! A lot to take in!! All the verses spoke to me.
As leaders we are to be judged more strictly. In my opinion, we as believers are called to be teaches, apostles, to all; your co-workers, wife, husband, kids, friends, family members, and those we pass on the street. Are the words coming from your mouth filled with cursing God, sexual connotations, or just filthy words used to fill up space? Not only words, but gestures, and actions as well, are forms of communication.
Are the words coming from your mouth, when examined, a surprise to you? Are you cursing, and praising God from the same mouth? Do you act and communicate one way while at work, and them differently with family or church? Do you talk one way with one group of friends, and then differently with another group, or the bank president?
How are your words being interpreted by your wife, boss, and coworkers?
If Jesus was standing before you now, would you choose your words a little more carefully? If so, WHY??
Why wouldn't our words, already be in check?
Maybe because our words are a true measure of the crap we have hidden inside!!
Father God,
Thank You for speaking to me this week. Thank You for allowing me to get to the bank on time, making all the lights in town, and the meeting to go better than expected. Forgive me Father for speaking without thinking, and allowing my tongue to control myself, and lead others astray. Forgive me of my pride being too much to apologize, or to make positive changes in my life.
Help us Father to get out of the pig pen of crap we are in, due to our garbage of words which hurt ourselves and the others around us, who see us as a reflection of You. May the true reflection of You, be seen with words of love, peace, and assurance. Release us from bondage of self, and may the Holy Counselor be the one in control, and guidance in our lives.
Give us the wisdom and knowledge of being better husbands, wives, friends, and servants, for You, and Your plans for each of us. May our words build up others, instead of tearing down.
Thank You for being with us, and may the measurement we have next week of our communication, be more of You, and less of us.
For it is in the precious and perfect name of Jesus, we ask and claim these things, Amen!!!
God Bless,
David B.
