Let's just say...

[J-Shaped]

Don't forget to make sure you put stickers all over your vehicle supporting the various equipment manufacturers you are keeping in business and organizations you are not even a member of so people at the gas station will think you are an expert and want your advice......

And whatever you do, don't rely on woodsmanship or knowing your hunting territory to help you kill birds. Go into it with the mindset that there is not a bird that you can not call into your flock of decoys with your vest full of "custom" equipment and the loudest, most obnoxious cutts, cackles and yelps you can muster. If you hear one gobble after blowing your super high decibel peacock call, then immediately set down and begin to work him, even if you have located him from a public road. After all, if the video producers can do it, why can't you?

If and when you shoot your first gobbler, regardless of how it was taken, place all of your equipment, whether it was used in the hunt or not, in the picture and send it to all of the manufacturures you support so you can get on their Pro Staff. Then you'll be the real deal, and can get more stickers to place on your vehicle.

Once you've reached this status, there will be no stopping you. In fact, you may even get your own show.

Lastly, remember that all it takes is one experience with ANY turkey encounter and behavior to proclaim yourself as an expert on the subject and you can preach your doctrine and theory all over the internet because nobody else will know any different. After all, if a turkey does something once, they'll ALWAYS do the same thing again

Good luck and save money to pay your taxidermist! 

[TauntoHawk]

my truck and back seat are piled high and there is NO visible bare floor in the room im currently sitting in because it is turkey season and thats how much gear I have out... theres also an abnormally large credit card bill coming and about 3000 extra miles on the vehicle


but dont worry, there is several pounds of meat taking up less than 1 shelf in my freezer that says its worth it 

[J-Shaped]

my truck and back seat are piled high and there is NO visible bare floor in the room im currently sitting in because it is turkey season and thats how much gear I have out... theres also an abnormally large credit card bill coming and about 3000 extra miles on the vehicle


but dont worry, there is several pounds of meat taking up less than 1 shelf in my freezer that says its worth it 

Amen to that. When I turn the A/C on in my truck, it smells like a mixture of red clay and Permanone......

[TRKYHTR]

Poor guy was just asking for a little help getting started turkey hunting. Who better to answer some questions like that than internet turkey hunting experts. You guys aught to be ashamed of yourselves. But it was funny as heck.   

TRKYHTR

[stinkpickle]

[OLE RASPY]

Don't forget to make sure you put stickers all over your vehicle supporting the various equipment manufacturers you are keeping in business and organizations you are not even a member of so people at the gas station will think you are an expert and want your advice......



Aint this the truth.

I love these people that do this.

[Spring_Woods]

Can't you guys take anything serious!

[guesswho]

Can't you guys take anything serious!

Just turkey hunting, and even then I have a hard time staying on track.  Maybe I got the thread headed in the wrong direction, I probably misunderstood.  I didn't realize you were serious, the for entertainment purposes threw me off   Now that I know it was a serious question I take back my answer and I better let someone else answer it

I have a short attention span if you haven't already figured that out.

[GobbleNut]

Ya' don't have to wurry nun 'bout gittin' any a that stuff theze boyz is spoutin' off about!  Furgit about gittin' any a them fancy-dancy calls 'n guns 'n such.  Here's how ya' become tha' best durn tarky huntr in the kuntry.

First off, ya' got ta' fine ya' a guud spot ta' go a'huntin'.  Git out yonder in them wuuds and fine yurself sum tarkys.  Don't mater if'n it's pri-vate land 'r not, jist as long as ya' kin hide guud in them wuuds without sum one kitchin' yur behine.  

Git ya' sum korn, 'r plant ya' sumthin' in them thar wuuds that'll atract them tarkys,...or put yurself up one'a thim feders fir a cupple a days.  Now yer reddy ta' commence a'huntin'!

Now ya' gotta git ya' one'a them thar traut lines,...ya' know, tha one's with tha long cord and all them huuks 'tached to it.  Now, 'tach tha cord to sumthin' guud and strong and put ya' sum korn or such on them huuks ya' got on that traut line, and string that sukker 'round out yonder wher ya' put that tarky feed.  

Git in tha bushis and hide yurself reel guud.  Won't be long 'til tha tarkys start to showin' up t' git ther dinner.  After while, sum 'a them tarkys is gonna' git aholt a sum of them thar huuks, and whin they do, all heck is gonna' commense.   Ya' gotta' be sure ya' got'a guud strong cord on that thar trout line, 'cuz if'n ya' pikked yur spot rite, sumtimes yur gonna git two or three of them garblers huuked up all at onced, 'n mabee even a cupple a them thar hens.

Ya' best have a guud long hikry staub pole handy in case them birds git ta tryin' to fly off on ya' so's ya kin knok thar arses outta tha air,...kind'a liik one'a them thar tetherbal games.
Anywho, sens ya ain't makin' no rakket a'callin' and'a shootin' 'n such, ya kin just gathur all them bards up at yur leeshur an ya' dun't hav ta' wurry 'bout no revenuers and sich comin' after ya'.

I ain't never told nobody 'bout ma' sekret methud 'til jus now,..ceptin' a cupple o'
Texuns 'n mabee a suthen boy 'r two,...'n oh yeah, them Californikins thet came over thisaway a few years back.  You boyz dun't go tellin' nobudy els now, ya hear!

Guud huntin' to ya'!

[guesswho]

Man, with my opening response to this thread I was really worried about this whole end of the world ordeal today.  I would have had some splaining to do at the Pearly Gates.

[stinkpickle]

Man, with my opening response to this thread I was really worried about this whole end of the world ordeal today.  I would have had some splaining to do at the Pearly Gates.

Yeah...I've got a lot of apologies to make. 

[guesswho]

Yeah...I've got a lot of apologies to make. 

I'm blaming my behaviour on WWSPD.   I ask myself What Would Stinkpickle Do!  Then just started typing.

[stinkpickle]

Yeah...I've got a lot of apologies to make. 

I'm blaming my behaviour on WWSPD.   I ask myself What Would Stinkpickle Do!  Then just started typing.

It doesn't hold up in court.  Others have tried...they're still wearing orange suits.   

[TRKYHTR]

Man, with my opening response to this thread I was really worried about this whole end of the world ordeal today.  I would have had some splaining to do at the Pearly Gates.

Yeah...I've got a lot of apologies to make. 

Your right Stink. You probably have about another 50 years or so. So you should probably get started on those apologies. 

TRKYHTR

[Roost Wrecker]

This is a funny thread and the sad thing is its true.