Buddy Question---What Should I do?

[gatrapper]

I have a group of buddies I have known for several years.

We used to hunt a lot together, but last few years it has kinda slacked because I have been a little put off.

I couple of them started poaching on properties because they say that no one hunts them and yada yada yada. Like most folks they are going through financial issues with the economy, but they are out there still buying tons of new toys. New ATV, Gun, Duck Calls, etc. Couple of the guys are married and some are single, but its just bothering to be around now.

I would think that if one was in debt and such one wouldn't go buy an ATV and all that crap, but they continue to do so, yet constantly complain about how hard life is.

They are always wanting to come hunt with me and on my properties, yet none of them have ever offered to take me to theirs. They always want to borrow some of my gear when they hunt. Always wanting help on how to call and how to do other stuff, yet have never really helped me out with anything.

Idk if I am sounding selfish or not.

Just has been getting old. A big part of me tells me that I need to stop talking to them and get them out of my life, but another part is just tough to shut the door on my buddies.

What do y'all think?

[stone road turkey calls]

I'ts time to find some new friends, they will never change. do it now and get over it.

[fl panhandler]

IMHO if they a "true" friends you should be able to tell them you are feeling used and about used up.  The one 's that are true friends will get the message the ones that aren't will fall by the wayside.  I don't think anyone in your shoes wants to be taken advantage of.  That's just my opinion and you know what people say about opinions.
Rick

[gatrapper]

Imo we are all close enough that we can talk about anything.  Doesn;t matter if its about money, girlfriends/wifes, work, etc.

For me its just getting old being around folks who constantly make stupid decisions. 

[S.C.C]

Like the good book says...Don't cast your pearls to the swine!!! 

[Basser69]

GA, I went through the same thing with some of my buddies. I just cut my losses and moved on. You might be better to do the same. jmo That is one of those decisions you have to make on your own. No one here can, nor should tell you how to live your life. It is a decision you have to make and live with.

[GobbleNut]

If the guys are starting to poach, then you want to distance yourself from them as soon as you can,...and let others know that you condemn that.  If you don't, you will fall into the "guilt by association" category, and that will eventually effect you down the road in all sorts of ways. 

You obviously have a pretty clear idea of what needs to be done.  You will have to decide if you want to burn down the bridge completely,...or just take a few of the planks out of the middle.  If these guys are the slackers that you make them out to be, I'd be getting the gas can out pretty pronto.

[flintlock]

I'd go hang with some guys of higher caliber.  Iron sharpens iron...or sooner or later, they will make you RUST!

[ILIKEHEVI-13]

They know they are wrong.  Tell them they are a better person than this.  Get them to accept they don't have to do this and stop it.  They can change.  We all do things that we shouldn't.  I'm not telling you to accept it.  I'm saying a true friend will help them to correct what they are doing.  They should do the same for you when your doing wrong.  That's what friends do.  They help each other out through thick and thin.  But tell them where you stand on the issue.  

[Kylongspur88]

For me its just getting old being around folks who constantly make stupid decisions. 

Sounds to me like you have respect for the outdoors and the sport, and your more mature than your current group. I have hunted with some real idiots. It stresses me out and ticks me off. I choose not  to hunt with them any more. If your stressed over guys you hunt with then you will stop enjoying the sport and that's not fair to you. Some of them may decide to grow up, but some probably wont. I would be more concerned about preserving the enjoyment of the sport for yourself rather than stepping on some toes.

[Wingbone]

I've been on both sides of this situation. Years ago, when I was a kid, I had the good fortune of growing up on our large family farm that was full of deer and turkey. I wasn't very adherent to game laws, because I had the impression that, "hey, these are MY deer and turkeys." Later that attitude spilled into whatever I was hunting. A good buddy of mine always hated that I did that kind of stuff and one day came over and had a man to man with me. He explained how he hated seeing me disrespect the animals that he valued so much. In short, he made me feel about 3 inches tall, but it helped me understand that the way I did things was wrong. I left that day with a much greater appreciation of wildlife and for friends like him. Laws are in place to protect wildlife, not benefit the hunter.

[barry]

Tough call.
I had a so called "good friend" of mine actually trespass onto land that I had permission to hunt the very next year after I had taken him with me hunting on this piece of property.
The following year we caught his son, his Dad and one of his friends on the property.
We don't hunt together any more!

[ILIKEHEVI-13]

I've been on both sides of this situation. Years ago, when I was a kid, I had the good fortune of growing up on our large family farm that was full of deer and turkey. I wasn't very adherent to game laws, because I had the impression that, "hey, these are MY deer and turkeys." Later that attitude spilled into whatever I was hunting. A good buddy of mine always hated that I did that kind of stuff and one day came over and had a man to man with me. He explained how he hated seeing me disrespect the animals that he valued so much. In short, he made me feel about 3 inches tall, but it helped me understand that the way I did things was wrong. I left that day with a much greater appreciation of wildlife and for friends like him. Laws are in place to protect wildlife, not benefit the hunter.

Case in point that anyone can change their ways including if the shoe is on the other foot.  

Thanks for typing that.  

We all do things wrong.  It's easy to throw the first stone.  But a true friend will be their to pick you up after the stone hits ya.  

[ILIKEHEVI-13]

Heck I have done some bad things over the years, but I'm trying to fix my mistakes.  I had a guy tell me once that we all make mistakes, but we gain knowledge from each one that only makes us wiser for our future.  That's where wisdom comes from. 

[Tail Feathers]

You're not wrong.  They can be buddies but I would let them be hunting buddies.