The Turkey Escapade as it's become know!
Déjà vu is best described as an eerie feeling one gets thinking or feeling you've been here and done this before.
Deja Moo as I call it is when you know you have heard or experienced this bull crap before!
27 years have gone by, and it happened again! I think this was a mixture of both Déjà vu and Deja Moo.
First off allow me to preface this story by stating I love my daughter in law, and that all the names have been changed to protect the innocent. Additionally, there is no mention that this story is true or fictional should my daughter in law read this. I have to have some level of anonymity and plausible deniability.
My son Brandon and I both enjoy turkey hunting and were a bit surprised when my daughter in law (His wife Jen) expressed an interest in turkey hunting.
My son recently bought a home with 14 wooded acres which is bordered on one side by 500 acres of woodland and 40 acres on the other side. Across the road is an additional 50 some acres, none of this is hunted unless somebody sneaks in unannounced.
We shot a few turkeys on his property along with a number of deer. Jen even managed to kill a few deer with her compound bow. So, Brandon being the good man that he is sets up two popup blinds side by side so all three of us could be comfortable. He had chairs inside both blinds along with a tripod to hold Jen's gun steady.
Jen is a nurse who just got off a 12 hour shift 3 hour prior to our hunt but she still wanted to go hunting with Brandon and I.
My mistake was electing to sit in a blind with my daughter in law or maybe it was divine intervention!
So here we are in the blinds settled in maybe 1 hour before daylight which I thought was ample time for Jen to relax and get comfortable.
Problem was Jen got too comfortable but not before I had to listen to the full gamut of complaints which if I shut my eyes, I would have thought I was with Brandon at age 6 or 7. Within minutes Jen was complaining about her butt hurting from the chairs, asking why we were sitting in the dark waiting for turkeys to walk by. She was hungry, wanted/needed something to drink, she couldn't see properly and had to pee!
I thought after that rant and her relieving herself in the wood's things would settle down but Oh No!
Jen gets out her cell phone and lights up the inside of the blind like a Christmas tree!
She was asking questions about the Tripod and how it works. So, I explained everything that might happen during our hunt and what she could expect. I'm trying to be polite and allow Jen the freedom to ask questions and just enjoy our time in the woods.
Jen wanted to put her shotgun on the tripod to get a feel for it. With shotgun now mounted on the tripod her face down on the stock as if looking at the red dot I hear this strange sound. I look over at her and she is sound asleep, snoring. By this time my son in the other blind is whispering asking me what the heck we are doing. I told him his wife was asleep at the wheel and explained she passed out while looking at her red dot while her gun was on the tripod.
I woke her up and while I took the gun from the tripod all I could do was smile as it brought back so many memories. Now properly in her chair I'm trying to whisper from one blind to the other explaining to my son what happened. Soon she nodded off again only this time while almost falling off her chair she kicked to tripod over with her foot. It was all I could do not to laugh, and my only comment was, "Good nap"?
That's all it took! She started laughing and couldn't stop. With her hat in her hand covering her mouth in an effort to keep quite all I could do is stare at her which made matters worse!
Shortly after that Jen's cell phone rang because she forgot to put it on mute or vibrate mood. Oh, I knew that got my son's feathers ruffled! Once Jen settled down all it took was one look from me and she was laughing again. Honestly, I didn't help matters any because I would look at her roll my eyes, stare at her or toss my hands up while they were on my lap as if to say WTH and she would start laughing again.
I know my son was in the other blind most likely getting ticked at all the commotion, but I was having fun! Jen fell asleep a few more times and me being the agitator that I am I would make her laugh. At one point she was sleeping in her chair with her head on my should and if I had to grab my shotgun I couldn't. Oh, I knew full well we weren't going to see a turkey let alone shoot one, but I had fun!
My son on the other hand wasn't as happy and or understanding with Jen's first turkey hunt. All I had to do was mention all the times he fell asleep and the dumb things he did when I took him hunting and he was fine.
Things I learned but forgot over the years. If you allow them to see the truck, it's an open invitation to go back to the truck to get warm.
If they can see the house, it's an invitation, a calling if you will; to go back to the house to use the facilities!
Sit back if you will and reminisce about some of the things you might have done in the woods.
The moral of the story is.
Take somebody new hunting, live life, have fun in all you do, laugh, and enjoy the experience!
