I know this is extremely odd to post on a hunting forum but I was wondering if any of you have adopted a child and how that experience was for you? My wife and I are going through the beginning stages of it and just finished a home study. So far it has been pretty stressful. Not trying to bring uncomfortable topics to the table but just trying to find other men's perspectives as I work through it myself.
Hey brother I've never done it but as a dad children are the best part of our life. I commend you for what you're doing. I hope others offer help n some answers.
Ask God for help too
Quote from: Bowguy on December 27, 2016, 08:06:54 PM
Hey brother I've never done it but as a dad children are the best part of our life. I commend you for what you're doing. I hope others offer help n some answers.
Ask God for help too
I appreciate it. God and I have been talking about it for about 2 years now and he gave me his answer so I am trying to follow up on my part.
Quote from: Bowguy on December 27, 2016, 08:06:54 PM
Hey brother I've never done it but as a dad children are the best part of our life. I commend you for what you're doing. I hope others offer help n some answers.
Ask God for help too
x2, great what you are doing...
You are a blessed man. I have a friend that's going through the process. My advice is to set no expectations, and have patience. Everything in His time, not yours.
My youngest is adopted. She's in college now.
We took a big leap of faith and it's been a true blessing.
The process wasn't easy, but I guess childbirth the old fashioned way isn't a cakewalk either. ;D
She is my child by God's will, regardless of DNA she carries.
Didn't adopt in the strictest sense however my wife had two children from a previous marriage. They were very young when we started dating. I love those kids like my own. I refer to them as my kids and they call me dad. I didn't have children before I met them and they have changed my life for the better. I never had a father and I have always wanted a chance to make life better for my children. The biggest thing I have learned about raising children is giving them a stable environment. Children feed of off what is going on around them. They need to see you and your wife having a strong and loving relationship as well as feel loved and appreciated themselves. Not everything will always be perfect and mistakes will be made on all sides. But if they know that they have a stable base so to speak then you have given them the best start they could have. It can seem a little overwhelming at first but you will be fine. The fact that you have worried about it shows that you want to do it right. Love them, teach them right from wrong and keep the communication doors open. Pray for guidance and the ability to understand. I think a certain kid is going to be very lucky.
Sent from my SM-G800R4 using Tapatalk
Gentleman, I sure do appreciate the kind words of advice. Like Happy, I didn't have a father growing up so I guess that's what worries me the most. Not knowing really what to do or how to be. My rule of thumb has always been be the man I wanted in my life and my mom to have. So far it has served me decently. I really appreciate your encouragement.
I commend you for your decision.
I too didn't have a father growing up. When I got married my wife came with a beautiful little girl.
I had no idea what I was doing as father, and I'm sure I made plenty of mistakes. I just loved her unconditionally and put her and my wife first as I would if she was my flesh and blood.
Today, twenty years later I'm proud to say I have a beautiful, strong, loving young women that calls me daddy, and as an extra bonus gave us our first grand baby a couple of years ago.
Have patience and ask God for his help and you will be fine.
Good luck and God Bless.
The most stressful part is for the adopted child. Once he or she finds out that you are one of those insane turkey hunters...... :z-dizzy:
Quote from: KentuckyHeadhunter on December 28, 2016, 01:37:08 PM
The most stressful part is for the adopted child. Once he or she finds out that you are one of those insane turkey hunters...... :z-dizzy:
True that. I have read in Tom Kelly and Kenny Morgan's books where they got to take their kids out hunting and teaching them that kind of stuff and man do I look forward to that. In the adoption book we present to birth parents I insisted that pictures of me and my cousin with our tukeys are present. Just so the birth mom knows what the child is about to be getting into :z-winnersmiley:
Yes..my departed wife and I attempted to adopt her worthless sister's child. We finally said to hell with it after being put through a meat grinder of custody hearings, psychological testing, income verification, etc., etc., yet they allowed the child to once again return to the mother after her release from jail or prison. Three time loser. The child is God knows where now.
Good luck.
I have never adopted a child but I have friends who have and I am friends with a couple who is also in the process. I know it is a roller coaster emotional ride. My daughter is the the most important thing in my life. I am sure your child to be will be too. God Bless your journey as you go through the process
Glockgirl is right, it can be a real emotional roller coaster. Sometimes it happens real fast, usually not. We were in the book for almost two years and met two birth mothers, neither panned out. That is hard. Then we got the call and it happened in a few days. That is elation. :D That was almost 19 years ago and I remember it vividly.
Are you going through an adoption agency? We used one supported by the Catholic church (not Catholics ourselves, but we liked the worker and their philosophy). I have one the old fashioned way, a niece we took in when she was 8 and adopted one. It doesn't change how you love them or matter much HOW they come into you life, it matters that they do.
Good luck on your journey to fatherhood.
Quote from: Tail Feathers on December 28, 2016, 09:14:33 PM
Glockgirl is right, it can be a real emotional roller coaster. Sometimes it happens real fast, usually not. We were in the book for almost two years and met two birth mothers, neither panned out. That is hard. Then we got the call and it happened in a few days. That is elation. :D That was almost 19 years ago and I remember it vividly.
Are you going through an adoption agency? We used one supported by the Catholic church (not Catholics ourselves, but we liked the worker and their philosophy). I have one the old fashioned way, a niece we took in when she was 8 and adopted one. It doesn't change how you love them or matter much HOW they come into you life, it matters that they do.
Good luck on your journey to fatherhood.
Tail Feathers we are going through adoption assistance based out of Kentucky but we are in TN. They will link us up with different agencies though if we see a situation we are interested in even though that sounds bad. Did you all do any fundraising or anything like that? We have been talking about selling t-shirts to help with the cost. Whats your thoughts?
I've seen those, and supported some of them. We were fortunate enough to have saved up enough to just pay it. Whatever it takes, don't be shy about your desire to become parents. Creative fundraising ideas and social media go hand in hand. :icon_thumright:
My wife and I adopted a little boy out of foster care six years ago. His birth mother was too involved in drugs to be a mom. He's 10 now and is doing really well. We're going to try to get him his first gobbler this coming Spring here in Utah. Anyway, the advice I would like to give you is stay positive. I won't lie, the home studies, the visits, the interviews, etc. can be real frustrating. I questioned a lot of the policies and procedures involved many times. My wife was a rock through it all and constantly reminded me that God would intervene when needed. Good luck to you. I absolutely respect your commitment!
Quote from: Turkeyman11 on December 28, 2016, 10:53:49 PM
My wife and I adopted a little boy out of foster care six years ago. His birth mother was too involved in drugs to be a mom. He's 10 now and is doing really well. We're going to try to get him his first gobbler this coming Spring here in Utah. Anyway, the advice I would like to give you is stay positive. I won't lie, the home studies, the visits, the interviews, etc. can be real frustrating. I questioned a lot of the policies and procedures involved many times. My wife was a rock through it all and constantly reminded me that God would intervene when needed. Good luck to you. I absolutely respect your commitment!
Turkeymann11 keep me posted on your boys bird this spring bc Im sure he will get one. I like you have been mad at the procedure and policies but my wife keeps me in check with that. We have been working on t-shirt designs today and believe we are going to use Matthew 17:20 "Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, Move from here to there, and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you." With mountains as the background.
I appreciate you sharing your story with me and will keep you all posted as time goes on.
Quote from: Jwall on December 28, 2016, 12:23:15 PM
Gentleman, I sure do appreciate the kind words of advice. Like Happy, I didn't have a father growing up so I guess that's what worries me the most. Not knowing really what to do or how to be. My rule of thumb has always been be the man I wanted in my life and my mom to have. So far it has served me decently. I really appreciate your encouragement.
Sounds like a good set of guidelines to follow. I have never adopted but but do have a stepson that I have helped raise since he was 5. My dad was in and out of my life so I never really had a father figure to guide me so I too was nervous about being a dad. My advice is to just love them, instruct them, be open and nonjudgmental. You and your wife's love and faith in God will guide you through this and make you great parents. It's a wonderful thing your doing and that child will be thankful I am sure. There is no better joy in the world than having children. Good luck and God Bless.
Quote from: Jwall on December 27, 2016, 08:09:52 PM
Quote from: Bowguy on December 27, 2016, 08:06:54 PM
Hey brother I've never done it but as a dad children are the best part of our life. I commend you for what you're doing. I hope others offer help n some answers.
Ask God for help too
I appreciate it. God and I have been talking about it for about 2 years now and he gave me his answer so I am trying to follow up on my part.
Awesome man!
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk