This is similar to the Word Association Game. You are allowed to post 3 words to continue the story.
There once was
a little turkey :funnyturkey:
Who was hungry
and ate some
Crickets and spiders
and got gas
In his belly
suddenly without warning
a hunter appeared
and smelled something
so he grabbed
his squellinghen call
and called frantically.
The turkey ran
like a bat
out of hades
when he fell :newmascot:
and hurt his
three toed foot
That old bird
screamed in pain
Then without warning
a hen appeared
with a beard
which preceded to
strut her stuff
for the gobbler
He knew that
She was hot
and then he
spit and drummed
like never before.
Now his snood
Tripled in length
He Tripled Gobbled :newmascot: :newmascot: :newmascot:
then looked around
and saw my
shotgun pointing at
one eye closed
Hands were Shaking
knees were weak
Then I missed. (he can't die yet)
and then he
pulled a gun
with hammer cocked
and bang bang
bullets went flying
not another one
will get away
Until next season
The tom got
What he deserved.
a face full
Oh no, he's.........
still not dead
,he started running
Dang ninja turkeys!
I love this game. Thanks Wendell! This is gonna end up hilarious eventually.
Carry on.
Dang ninja turkeys!
always get away
then come back
If we're lucky
he'll gobble again
now call shy
Just Dig In
and stay alert
Dont fall asleep :newmascot:
he'll be back
When he's horney :newmascot:
What was that........ :alien:
He gobbled quickly
as if to
brake my pride
Now he's laughing
At your TSS
In His Face :newmascot:
That didn't penetrate
But he has
a grenade launcher
But gobbler is
too far away
Get him tomorrow
when he's roosting
With a rifle
Dang, gotta work
I'll hafta skip
work and go
seek my revenge
trying to murder
The next day.....
Had Gobbler Nuggets :newmascot:
on sale at
Long Spur Inn :newmascot:
Wait, no, it.......
was chicken nuggets
poor nuggetless chicken
But the turkey
covered his nuggets
decided to go
But just before
Hal Killed Him :newmascot:
the turkey took
A look behind
a corn feeder
and there sat
large brested hen
Then at once
the gobbler realized
he being watched
by another gobbler
are you eastern
or a sissy
with short spurs?
I'm a Merriam
With a long
middle toe so
nobody was confused
except the hunter
who's now obsessed
with red heads
and a fan
Missing most of
his long spurs
And Jake Beard :newmascot:
He shock gobbled
then shut up
to sneak in
So I could
Bust A Cap :newmascot:
In his face
But when he
heard me call
he farted loudly
Then I giggled
it smelled skunky
It reminded me......
of Obama's speach
Then Came Guesswho :newmascot:
Hillary Rodham Clinton
Guesswho brought rocks
and stoned her
70 yards away :z-guntootsmiley:
pal Monica appeared
and everyone smiled
Bill didn't inhale
Pass the cigars :icon_thumright:
I did not
have sexual relation
with Nancy Pelosi
Even though she
was butt naked
And begging me
with stinky breath (We went from a little turkey to this. Wow what a story this will end up to be. :TooFunny: :TooFunny:)
And rotten teeth ( when I check this thread and read this, I laugh out loud at my computer.. this is great :TooFunny:)
for a LifeSaver
I then awakened
sweating and shaking
on my desk
realizing that I
Lost my pants
and made a'mess
just my luck
my coworkers arrived
This is awkward
I started to
pull up my
boxers and socks
when a co-worker
started to undress
along with another
then I remembered
I was supposed
to pick up
the neighbors kid
to go huntin'
This is wrong
I wonder where
the gobbler went (before we get deleted lol)
I should have
brought more shells
checked my drawers
not in there....
all i found
was my diaphragm
Hey, that's not
my boxer shorts
In that hotel
where I met
Ruth Bader Ginsburg
man she's weird
reminds me of
A bearded hen
In a field
After Ruth left....
I knew there
was time to
Go kill turkeys
But the gobbler
was now gone
He was overcalled
On public land
On the limb
but at least
there is time
For a quickie
behind the house
lost my drawers
And then she
got kinda freaky
With my shotgun
Thankfully it was
not really loaded
but it was
clean and ready
to shoot again
Got a smoke?
Now I'm ready
for a beer
Just had one
now I'm going
to pass out
in the woods.
and dream about
hunting loudmouth birds
until I hear
A Chipmunk Fart
I look around
for my banjo
I see it
I start picking
my nose and
Shart my drawers
now where did
my banjo get
The young turkey
(http://i844.photobucket.com/albums/ab7/Gobln2/019.jpg)
MOUNTED MY DECOY
sang along with
The village people :toothy12:
while in drag
He couldn't believe
the funny gobblers
that were dancing
Like Michael Jackson :jackson:
after the dancing
I Heard Something :newmascot:
like sirens wailing
Turkeys Went Everywhere :newmascot:
except for one
he wasn't bright
I Yelped Once :newmascot:
he did nothing
I Yelped Again :newmascot:
he gobbled loudly
Heart Was Pounding :newmascot:
teeth were chattering
I Looked Over :newmascot:
and saw Shannon
He was strutting
cutting and yelping
He kee kee'd
it puzzled me
where'd bird go ?
to the roost
after his hen
and some viagra
bang....bang...bang
that were trying
to shoot blanks
Hen was laughing
So they tried
foreplay before they
got on down
to nitty gritty
They started dusting
Cleaning the bugs
drying the sweat
Grooming each other..
Then a jake
Tried to steal
his redhead hen
a fight began
Spurs were flyin,
soon they realized
a safety clicked
the fight stopped
heads went up
hammer went down :smiley-char092:
Hevi shot flew
But it missed
ricocheted of rocks
hit my truck
now I'm pi$$ed
and my horn
got really loud
turkeys gobbled! Reload!
I took aim
Pulled the trigger
smoked the gobbler
He's a zombie!!!!!
Gotta quit roadhuntin'
maybe next year.
said the warden
You'll aim better
Slapped the warden
The warden retaliated
Im in jail
dropped my soap
suddenly I yelped
real aggressive and
tunneled out of jail.
Once free I
forgot my soap
think I'll buy
some braided rope
and make a
trap for the
funny gobblers that
are strutting around
trying to mount
The rainbow decoy
then they finished
had a smoke
I never noticed
the hidden camera
Shoot him now! :goofball:
Gun is jammed
Club him then!
But I'm Skeered!
Skeered Of What :newmascot:
wendels pot call
The turkey's confused
Eat more chicken
yelled the gobbler
at which time
A Buck Snorted :newmascot:
the gobbler ran
after a grasshopper
and ate him
grasshopper knew kung-fu
and boxing too
he kicked the
that gobblers gizzards
Chuck Norris hollered
here came pappy
locked and loaded
then without warning
It Started Snowing :newmascot:
It's nap time
Frostbite sat in
still nap time
under a tree
With Chiggers Everywhere :newmascot:
even in places
moma don't go
snow chiggers- ugh
that's no chigger
it's poision ivy
And it's on
most touched area
just gotta scratch
my inflamed buttocks
meanwile the turkey
was watching the
coyote sneaking in
The yote never
Had Chiggers Before :newmascot:
so he scratched
In The Leaves :newmascot:
now the gobbler
Went Ape S--- :newmascot:
and started walking
Side To Side :newmascot:
, his head is
Fire Engine Red :newmascot:
eye's locked on
A stinking booty
Fungus Among Us :newmascot:
All the sudden
boom boom boom
shooting blanks again
Gotta fix that
Getta 20 Ga. :newmascot:
That'll fix it :z-guntootsmiley:
its not broke
Booty POP began. :funnyturkey:
Chiggers On Booty ? :newmascot:
Its Permanon time
Hey, where's Pappy?
eating fried catfish
choking on a
hot hush puppy
so he grabs
some old #7
high brass lead
and decides to
trick the gobbler
by making squealing
hen sounds ,but
all he can
hear is banjo's
and pigs squealing
Oh my goodness.
that's a albino
or white phase
shoot him quick
before he putts
from the canoe
In the pond
cousin Billy Bob
went double bogie
using both teeth
went ninja archer
like robin hood
kung fu fighting
He spurred me
upside my head
dam ninja cat
:fud: Gotta kill 'em
shoot'm in head
Til' they dead
then shoot'em again
Uh-Oh banjos again
mother nature's calling
Power Dump Time :newmascot:
no green leaves
No tp either.
thankful for undershirts
squeaky clean again
toothless hillbilly appears
it's swamp people
hope this camo
isnt pee staind
that's not pee
thats doo doo
tastes like chicken
Frog Legs Do :newmascot:
Where's my gig?
On your desk
Beside her picture.
and divorce papers.
Stained with coffee
rope shovel tape
daydreaming is great
yes it is.
But tomorrow I
shoot that tom
have it mounted
With some nuggets
Mounted with nuggets?
Noooo, gonna eat'em
yum, yum, yum
:OGturkeyhead:
Save us some
pass the plate
tap the keg,
hide the women
call off work
Don't Work Anymore :newmascot:
crank up Skynyrd
light the fire
enjoy the show
turkey frying time
country girls strutting
Ol Hank Singing
Ran outta nuggets :character0029:
should have shot
my wifes mother
^^ best one yet ^^^ :icon_thumright: :happy0064: :z-guntootsmiley:
She's wearing Kevlar
Breath out, squeeze
open eyes and
she's a zombie
I'll be a
bazooka toteing taxadermist
I ain't mounting
the head of
that Chupacabra looking
specimen of woman
that reeks of
ill advised breeding
My wife yells!!!!
NO MORE BABIES!
Out the house
FINE! Goin huntin!
and maybe fishing
with my lawyer
Or Your Sister :newmascot:
and your grandmother
In Her Wheelchair :newmascot:
wearing only latex
Gloves to keep
her sent from
Invading my skin
Like poison ivy
did last fall
Had a rash....
not in public
so I ran
to the elevater
dropped my pants
the door opened
and my boss
Pointed and laughed :TooFunny:
I need a raise
in my check
boss said no
so I lowered
my blood pressure
by dreaming about
an oatmeal bath
with Tiffany Lakosky
don't awake me
what a dream!
we're in a
race from Lee
and he's reloading
his corn pile
:OGturkeyhead: :OGturkeyhead:
"Faster" said Tiffany
please Tiff, say
what a rack!
that a girl
have a seat
now let's talk
all about turkeys
and your see-through
the foggy gloom
I'm so distracted
Because the gobbler
has moved on
leaving us alone
to regroup and
make a plan
what to do
:OGturkeyhead: :OGturkeyhead:
make a move
around his flank
being real quiet
as a mouse
darted past me
i started to
Country line dance :jackson:
the mouse giggled
and cut cheese
Sharp cheddar cheese
smells like munster
like Herman Munster
or maybe grandpa
after castrating goats
Or Mt. Oysters :newmascot:
From a bulls
Set Of Twins :newmascot:
I have four
then I giggled
then they jiggled
tthhhhhppphhhhht, that tickled
Oh my goodness
here comes my
girlfrend and wife
Talking amongst themselves
now I'm screwed
and their laughing
I'm really screwed
they have a
whip in hand
and some hand-cuffs
might be fun
might just run
go skinny dipping
With Them Both :newmascot:
before I disappear
in the timber
During Turkey Season :newmascot:
can't get better
Already Tagged Out :newmascot:
With Chaz Bono
And his mom
time for celebrating
Pop a top
is chaz bono
a bearded hen
Drenalinld's Boy Friend :funnyturkey:
He's a she
It's a Non-typical
with massive thighs
That Cant Dance :jackson:
unlike Sonny Bono
And Sexy Cher :newmascot:
hit a tree
while bear crawling
through saw briar
in the dark
picking his nose
with his striker
Digging for gold
nose started bleeding
Help me Tiffany
by placing your
hand on my
left ear then
stand on one
of my feet
with high heels
causes painful bunions
while dancing with
turkey hunting freaks
in bare feet
leopard print pajamas
and no unders
To cover my
super itchy spot
and red welts
no mas pantalones
I applied alcohol
To my liver
Quote from: lightsoutcalls on August 24, 2012, 09:19:14 AM
no mas pantalones
:TooFunny: :TooFunny: :TooFunny:
then keeled over
in a heap
Fell on Tiffany
two pet rabbits
soft and fluffy
as a cloud
I woke up
with serious hangover
my head's pounding
so's my heart
Of the sea
just like chicken
smells like fish
tastes like possum
or George Jones
nope, its tuna
could be crabs
or city chiggers
Don't wanna know
just don't ask
outhouse i go
free and easy
i yell loudly
It's the scaters
now I'm creeping
Towards a tom
with turkey umbrella
And turkey scent
Shoot the strutter!!!!!!
not in range
Squeal at him
he'll only laugh
use more scent
I already stink
More sent applied
now you stink
winds picking up
storm blowing in
it might snow
Or rain so
I stay inside
Double bull blind
hope Tiffany comes
by at nine
She's So Fine :newmascot:
Can't see her
Because I'm blind
by the light
so I feel
woosy and week
until I grab
trusty old scattergun
and take aim
pull the trigger
bird fly's away
shoot twice more
gotta go pattern
my buckshot loads
incase her husband
catches me trying
get a peek
at you know..
her perty toes
Smelt like poop
From scratching in
the barn stable
going to walmart
getting some icyhot
To rub on
my high arches
fester and stink
now they'll follow
me to my
new podiatrist's office!
He don't hunt
gotta foot fetish
licked my toes
eating toe jam
Smelled Kinda Sour :newmascot:
But felt good.....
smooth as butter
Taste like chicken
from the Colonel.
My mouth's watering
for some gravy
and mashed taters
Side of slaw
off to chic-fi-lay
for my fix
speaking of fix
my guns patterned
plaid and stripes
with a kilt
plus bagpipe yelper
And Long Socks :newmascot:
up to his
armpits in alligators
And big copperheads
Grabbed my .45
Poped Some Caps :z-guntootsmiley:
in his arse
looking for diamondbacks
that are endangered
Endangered Means Dead :newmascot:
kill all rattlers
and every coyote
will be judged
On their pelts
Hey! Where's Tiffany?
on my porch
Wearing nothing but
full camo wardrobe
In Mossy Oak
eatin' a moonpie
with an RC :you_rock:
bring her tums
or some pepto
for her tummy
fix it up
Come back inside
my man cave
has great mounts
Tiffany isn't impressed
she has bigger
and better looking
skins and racks
on the wall
I am embarrassed
about my spike
(http://i200.photobucket.com/albums/aa179/jitterbug2/Spikebucksnowshoe005.jpg)
Heez A Studddd!
(whats a story without pictures)
Where's that turkey :newmascot:
he's still creeping
around the woods
with his lady
peeking in windows
looking for a
hen to add
to his collection
, he's always looking
For another one
that looks like
gorgeous Miranda Lambert
, Blake gets mad
who is he
Not much of
a hillbilly bone
more like a
big bone head
with no lead
, now that I've
seen it all
I beg Tiffany
to show me
her favorite tricks
She Bends Over :newmascot:
you wake up
Peeing the bed
Change The Sheets :newmascot:
wife is thinken
what the hell
is this wig
doing on my
bedroom play swing
it wasn't there
when poolboy left
I lay there
thinking "Uh Oh"
dreaming about Tiffany
and ice cream
melting all over
before my wife
wakes me up :(
and slaps me
just for smilin'
Because she knows
how I work
,in the kitchen
Like A Dog ! :newmascot:
What's this about
That's not my
Pair of boots
Not Mine Either :newmascot:
must belong to
a big yeti
Or Stan Potts :newmascot:
Gimme a second
Gimme three steps :fud:
deep breath Stan
Stan passed out
Tiffany performed CPR
He's playing possum
maybe he's dreamin'
let him sleep
Stan's The Man :newmascot:
Stan wakes and
pee's his pants
Tiffany passes out
I begin CPR
Was it CCR?
Creedence Clearwater Revival
time to rock
out with my
Custom Turkey Call :newmascot:
and favorite female
olympic speed skater
with big tomaters
my dream girl
is rosie odonnel
I just puked... (http://i266.photobucket.com/albums/ii269/theogrit/Large%20Smilies/1lg066vomit.gif)
I puked again
shoot me please
I puked again
and again until
Tiffany started puking
shes still pretty
As A Picture :newmascot:
Where's that turkey :funnyturkey:
In The Freezer :newmascot:
with the backstraps
Tiffany's gonna cook
with some biscuits
Haley is coming
Now we're talking
shhhhh, turkey's comin
Scratch The Leaves :newmascot:
Keekee a little
fly down cackle
Soft yelping helps
PUTT, PUTT, PUTT
Be the ball
Throw a club :character0029:
Wheres Tiffany at
with the turkey :funnyturkey:
laughing at you
Struttin for Tiffany
Sticking his head
around her neck
a sper necklase
and some feathers
Tiffany begins giggling
when tickling her
Big Buck Tattoo :newmascot:
Lee started looking
And wanted one
Of my guns
So Did Tiff :newmascot:
So I gave
Her My Benelli :newmascot:
She hugged me
Lee Started Crying :newmascot:
I left with
Tiffany riding shotgun
In my Chevy
4x4 z71 extendedcab
To the trails....
& the mudpit
On The Pontoon :newmascot:
I shock gobbled
From the hills
And he gobbled
from the bottom
across the river
How do I....
sleep at night?
thinking about those
Big owl hooters
speakin' of hooters
I want wings
so to fly
Over to Tiffany's
Back Woods Cabin :newmascot:
in the holler
by the crick
through the woods
Behind The Barn :newmascot:
over the river
I can't swim
we make a.....
floating log raft
We began paddling
Like Huck Finn :newmascot:
help im sinking
You Need Floaties :newmascot:
HERE COMES A
Double Bearded Hen :newmascot:
jealous of tiffany
Tiffany left Lee :newmascot:
for Stan Potts
Now Tiffany's Challenger :newmascot:
An MMA fighter
(http://i844.photobucket.com/albums/ab7/Gobln2/003-6.jpg?t=1317932699)
NO THIS CHALLENGER :newmascot:
who stole it
Haley took it
To Will Primos
And Keith Burgess
That's the TRUTH!
Maybe it is
but Wilbur said
were my food
I am hungry
I like cake!
and pecan pie
So does Burgess
I can tell
Wonder if Tiffany
really likes Barry
Everybody Likes Barry :icon_thumright:
Except Chuck :chucknorris: Norris
Chuck's old school
he just old
Chuck won't die
He's truly invincible
Tiffany likes ME? :love5:
who are you
I'm Tiffany's boytoy
no i am
Them's fightin' words
What'd I say ?
Tiffany likes Frank :(
Tiffany Dumped Barry :newmascot:
She's lookin for
Ol' Stan Potts
Why would she
,Stan's not that....
energetic or handsome
the turkey is :funnyturkey:
More her type
Thought I was
Barry was wrong
Tiffany proved it
Barry didn't understand
why she gobbled
She Wanted Stan :newmascot:
he was busy
Poor poor Barry
Now he does
the hokey pokey
and square dances
While not wearing
his tighty whities
but pantyhose instead
pantyhose fit better
On Yo Head
I borrowed Tifanny's :drool:
Tif Wears Thongs :drool:
Sho 'nuff does
I wouldn't know :(
Wish I did :z-guntootsmiley:
Stan Likes Tif
Stan's too old
she'll hurt him
Stan's got Viagra
and also cialis
She'll handle it
all day long
and if not
Let's go hunting
something besides "Tiff"!
were that rabbit
I like squirrel
Breaded, with gravy
with homemade biscuits!
Now we're talking
Opener on Saturday
but gotta work
Works not fun
Squirrel hunting is
Huntin' tree rats
With 22 rifle :newmascot:
Can't be beat
Unless it's turkeyhunting
with .22 rifle?
sounds like a
no win situation
so you better
Take the scattergun
Or your bazooka
Don't wanna miss
lose your shirtail
Or fall down
in the mud
or the creek
In the holler
That aint good
no,it ain't
I fell once
twice, three times...
then stood up
I began limping
Because my knee
all sweeled up
Toppled over again.
Right into a
Flock of turkeys
a perfect bust
Waited 10 minutes :newmascot:
then started calling
I tree yelped
think I heard
someone else calling
I kee kee
then hrar scratching
Footsteps are approaching
It's big foot
trying to strut
he falls down
skins his knee
while eating jerky
and cheddar cheese
I like cheese
with Ritz crackers
and grape koolaid
Mixed with grain
alcohol while smoking
roll your own's
I'm getting hungry
jack links anyone
Sasquatch get mad
lets get even
Bust A Cap :z-guntootsmiley:
With my shotgun
pointed right at
From my porch
to the woods
On Posted Land
while holding my
ice cold beer
Between my legs
Playing my banjo
with Burt Reynolds
Singing back up
I dropped my
shorts while squealing
and got caught
like a pig
in a poke
Now I must
face the music
with my back
against the wall
Picking my nose
and scratching my
head while standing
on one foot
barking like Lassie
Wanting a bone
in her nose
Why do you
like banjo music
and watch Deliverance
In my trailer
wearing only BVDs
they so comfey
until someone pulls
a big knife
that is dull
can't stop squealing
like a pig
no, a hen ;D
hens squeal when :o
Eddie Salter calls
or blows up
A jake decoy
that looks like
a gay gobbler
with rainbow feathers
and a tutu
that wiggle when
when he struts
female like figure
girly like gobble
I go to
get outta here :emoticon-cartoon-012:
before someone see's
Chaz struttin again
and shoots him
with a tranquilizer
then pen him
and remove heshe's
dirty mind chaz
needs some superglue
for fake eyelashes
and hair extensions
a oscar meyer
Hot dog cooked
slid between buns
with yellow mustard
or "special sauce"
Who got sauced?
Obama and Biden
Dumb and dumber
or some R&R
pull my finger
I will not
tell a lie
, but Obama will
tell a bunch
See Mitt run
right over Obummer
We're in trouble
need a timeout
TO GO VOTE
so maybe we
can clean Whitehouse
paint it mossyoak.
Mitt likes camo
and turkey mounts
And Guns Too :z-guntootsmiley:
thats a fact
train a monkey :emoticon-animal-005:
Big Fat Jake :newmascot:
on the take
In The Lake
with a rake
mabey a hoe
can tell us
Yes Or No
What is "is"
I don't know
opposite of si.
anyone speak Spanish?
Hooked on phonics
¿de qué rayos estas hablando
I can't read
just press 2
No I won't
vote for Obama
Smitten with Mitt-en?
no, just patriotic
Not a communist
Back to hunting
no politics here
two wise men
walked into Cabelas
lookin' for some
Squealling hen calls
they were discontinued
so they decided
Call Eddie Saulter
he didn't answer
busy scouting turkeys
testing new call
the yodelling jake
with unbelievable results
don't believe it
I don't either
look at all
the huntin' shows
most are boring
And not realistic
the CRUSH is..
appealing to perverts
of all ages
they want me
To quit huntin
and start filming
wearing only a
Black leather chaps
that once belonged
to Chaz Nobone.
I just puked
all over my
double naught spysuit
now I'm screwed
like the pooch
feed me kibbles
but no nuggets
From a Jake
with no spurs
and a long
limp snood a'hangin'
trying to impress
my decoy, or...
Two lonely longbeards :newmascot: :newmascot:
who prefer snoods
Over bearded hens
They're like that
Thats why they
strut kinda funny
with limp wings
and erect fan
And fat tummy's
Jelly On Belly :newmascot:
and pierced caruncles
causing high pitched
squealing when they
mounted each other
Decoys cause confusion
dressed as clowns
with big....honkers
and little snoods
but big feet
feet are indicators
of the length
Of a Woody
ducks upper quacker
and lower tallywacker
which he uses
on hen woodies
Changing the subject........
To something less
private among gobblers
or among woodies
Harrelson and Allen
get paid to
pretend to be
someone they ain't
Haint the call
taint the hunter
Some just caint
without a complaint
use face paint
To Hide From
Their own Wife
Or weary gobblers :newmascot:
looking amazingly alike
who are also
really twin brothers
wearing matching cumberbuns
Wearing yellow boots
with pink bowties
And Painted Fingernails
now they're ready
Sharp'n pointed
serenading the ladies
Struttin and drummin"
yelpin and purrin
boom boom boom
no more ammo
back to the
3 missed shots
maybe change ammo
darn that mossberg
get a Browning
Get some glasses
Browning with scope
get a gatlingun
with rubber bullets
start playing golf
Or ping pong
Bowling is better
it takes balls
and returns them
after a strike
drink a beer
then another one
designate a driver
before bar hopping
looken for hens
Who are available
to mop vomit
around your carcass
while pole dancing
to Lynyrd Skynyrd
or Michael Jackson
ok, more vomit
dang fat girls
broke my pole
Fat girls sweat
like a hog
, if you drink
do not drive
it could cost
your beer money
and jail time
among toothless grinners
And big Bubba's
hooskow initiation club
open for business
Better stay away
don't drop soap
get soap rope
Watch your back
at all times
that's for sho
Next time you'll
Leave the soap
on the floor
Wash with shampoo
Baby back ribs
will not help
you to survive
the lonely nites
at a prison
Thinkin bout women
with big bubba
thinking about you
all night long
in bunk below
here he comes
Sooey! Sooey! Sooey!
I'll pretend to
go to sleep
with one eye
Watching for Bubba
I heard footsteps
to grab my
Homemade toothbrush shiv
oooo to slow
warden save me
Warren is Bubba
I am confused
which happens sometimes
quite often, actually
when Bubba is
knocking at the
jail cell door
wearing a smile :)
holding a fifi
whistling a tune
Watching Shawshank Redemption
jailbreak being planned
dirt filled pockets
Files under mattress
poster on wall
didn't seeit coming
a clean getaway
through drain pipe
Smell that sewage
freedom smells sweet
Ooops, I forgot
they've got dogs
to the river
Soggy Bottom Boys
Dapper Dan Gel
thought you's a'toad!
where art thou
dancing and singing
like Michael Jackson
with burning hair
one white glove
moon walking across
my heart like .....
the Mars rover
hounds gettin closer
run Forrest run
leave no scent
find rubber boots
leave jumpsuit behind
run around naked
swangin' in breeze
Dang thorn bushes.
Run to truck
out of luck
keys locked inside
It's really cold
nonthing club member.
:OGturkeyhead: :OGturkeyhead:
need a rock
out of gas
there's a skateboard
and gravel road
Solitary confinement awaitin'
So Is Bubba
Not him again :emoticon-cartoon-012:
he's gotta go
but probably won't
he's a sissy
and terribly constipated
Needs Fleet Enemia
Bubba will help
Where's my shank
under your bunk
Along with lotion
for your fifi
or the monkey
On your back
stab, stab, stab
monkey was evil
dropped his cymbals
ran to door
opened it up
searched for clothing
grabbed pink underwear
and tube socks
stuffed down underwear
to enhance his
too thin waistline
Looked like Twiggy
she wasn't hot
and smelled terrible
she IS British
and French related
,off to the
races we go
And we're off :emoticon-cartoon-012:
in the head
lights,I seen
in the distance
a large Sasquatch
eating jack links
I approach him
he shotputs me
because I teased
Him about turkeys
Being in season
he was cheesed
sprayed with beer
wet tee shirt
At the beach
OOH OOH OOH
wife slaps you
shrug it off
take another look
through dark sunglasses
start to drewel
all over my
new turkey vest
slate wont run
mouth getting dry
need some 'Jack".
in the box
Pop goes the
left front tire
on my wheelchair
I begin crawling
toward the light
at the end
of the tunnel
My Hoovaround's stuck!
gobbler crests knoll
squirrel mounts gobbler
gobbler tucks tail
Hen attacks squirrel
grandmother likes pudding
Jello Puddin' Pops
don't require teeth
unless they're frozen
slurp, lick, slurp
Gotta Icecream headache
OHHHHHHHHHH my head
is thinking turkey
eleven inch beard
Razor sharp spurs
snood a swangin
missing one eye
gobbling on roost
dropping lots'a poop.
swingin' hula hoop
while moon walking
along his limb
fly down time
will be postponed
due to violating
the arms treaty
time to organize
Turkey hunters unite
cackle in unison
and triple gobble
with assembly calls
no putting allowed
Cramp in Leg
pain in back
pop a pill
getting sleepy now
Take a nap
lifes to short
to not hunt
when you can
take a child
Show them patience
and woodsmanship skills
along with ethics
and safety tips
for future generations
pass it on
down the line
It'll be rewarding
this you'll see
they'll be thankful
They will enjoy
all natures beauty
and appreciate life
in the outdoors
watching spectacular sunrises
& turkey flydowns
sit and listen
feel heart pound
rush of adrenaline
and heavy breathing
rewards are priceless
memories lasting forever
take some photos
Smile real big :funnyturkey:
no damb film
Oh, it's digital
use yer phone
battery to low
Turkey's got charger
Plug er in
then he gobbles
sounds kinda hoarse
put him down
Tiffany comes over
you pass out
I take over
two seconds later
I hear gobbling
He's over there
doin' his thang
behind that oak
wings start flapping
tail fanning out
beard hanging down
spurs a' janglin'
hens a looking
his snood a'hangin'
my heart pounding
heart attack ackackack....
call the ems
get to hospital
power goes out
generator kicks on
gobblin' fever again?
Its deer season
with cold weather
big bucks moving
and I farted.
sounded like grunting
Or a snortwheez
what's that moisture?
Scratch and sniff
smells like poo
Tastes like chicken
Chicken Ala King
or rotten chicken
Now the turkey
get more tp
and a bucket
with a scoop
Found a shovel
Buried my inlaws
wasnt very nice
Wheres the love
after turkey season
Hens shut down
the poults arrive
along with predators
and other politicians
Republicans take over
unemployment goes down
Real change begins
out of hell
Damn obama won
The turkey's communist
out of hell
Christ pulled me
and I realized
He saved me!
So, I began
to give thanks
Onto the Lord
The season is..
Just about over
About to start
Tomorrow is the
next day coming
Look forward to
Drill a nasty
Big old Tom
HE IS RISEN!
Our guiding light
into the future
We blindly trek
wondering how we
Keep repeating past
But finally I
Opened my eyes
Saw new sights
That made me
understand my past
And began to
Respect my ancestors
That taught me
good family morals
That lead to
me being thankful
For all the
Lord has done
To help me
Through rough times.
like we're having
To deal with
This damn virus
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Needs to go!
And get back
Fast, gotta poop!
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Outta toilet paper!
Use coffee filters
then eat bacon
Because bacon is
A heart attack
If it's overdone
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Steak is tough
In the microwave
For one minute
it's too rare
Of an occurrence
To find gold
In them hills
Where the bears
Hunt for food
Dead right there
On the ground
He be gone
Like a flash
In a storm
Yingling carbon striker
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Best in show
first place ribbon
English Springer Spaniel
Bit my leg
and then he
Hiked his leg
It fell off
picked it up
Threw a bone
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and he ran
into the forest
stepped on pinecone
sprained my ankle
Yelled out loud
"Oh my lord"
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Who put that
on the ground
Then I looked
at my watch
Time has come
Too pitch down
Be very still
You wasscally wabbit
what's up doc?
Nothing woad wunner
Who then said
LTB Kaiser GS-1
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Which meant he
has no clue
Who slapped him
Who slapped who?
Then he cried
here it comes.
Get down now
and then the
Fat lady sang
Get the camera
He's about to
put a cap
In his furry
Little behind because..
It itches badly
Due to ticks
And a dinglberry
Have you ever.....
such a story
That made you...
laugh so hard
It made me
Poop a little...
It really stank
But no TP
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Used Tobacco stick
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But too rough
Got a splinter
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Please get it
No way Jose!
What happened next
Based on a
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unbelievable true story
It's best too
have your woman
Make you sammich!
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For your hunt
for loud gobbles
to come running
to your calling
Gobbling and struttin
F$&@ you gobble.
he said when
He hung up
On his girlfriend
Just outside range
Behind a log
A hunter left :TooFunny:
A smelly mess.
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and used leaves
Better check fingers
don't smell them
Down one sock
hung on branch
Up side down
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In the wind
could have been
an atrocious sight
Then it fell
Ribs were cracked
Could hardly breathe
Winced in Pain
then I noticed...
Trickles of blood
Running down my...
face and arms
I'm not sure...
What to do
Sling and fling
started to sing...
Dear old Dixie
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Needed the banjo
Like on Deliverance
to play a
Song and dance
on the jukebox
At the honkeytonk.....
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drinking some whiskey
Dancing with babes.....
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Living the life
Schwacking big gobblers!!
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With archery gear
Stick and String
Spot and stalk
All the way!
The challenge is ...
Deeper and connecting
so you ponder
Your choices methodically
and with consternation
what to do.
Then an idea...
Has to go
Out the back
of the blind
I took aim
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Single shot musket
powder was wet
Pop fizzle snort
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sailor words ensued
My beer tastes
like warm piss
my beer smells
A little skunky
I wouldn't know..
What women like

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
To do alone
One hung low
Two did too
feels real tight
Is it good?
Maybe, maybe not
It ain't bad
No such thing
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Maybe in Cleveland
It smells like
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Fresh Ripened Blueberries
That stain your
Since of smell
and reminds me...
good old days
On the hilltop
down the valley
drinking homemade moonshine
all tax free
Until the feds
Raid your house
and seize your...
Premium Poon Tang
But it's legal
They being crooks
they took everything...
but the guns
and toilet paper
In limited supply
And should be
In extreme demand
Is it in?
Just the tip
Of the spear
Very sharp edge
like a knife
Cuts so deep
Hurts so good
It ain't out
long thin blade
Will cut you
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Deeper than deepest
you better hurry
Up and go
to the doctor
before it's late
Are you done?
No. Still kicking
Bites the dust
but then realized..
Where am I
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I am nowhere
and pretty confused
not entirely unusual
during this time
To be very
smart and cautious
To prevent warts
from growing on...
hands and such
other odd places
that need attention
sooner than later.
I didn't start
to be confused
Until the question
was asked about
What exactly happened
to your toe
Got a hangnail
Hurts like hell
Embrace the suck
to ease pain
Elevate hurting foot
Ice and heat
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
eliminates the swelling
Insert the toe
or the foot
Won't slide in
just went barefoot
Bigfoot always does
In the woods
By the lake
the gobbler strutted
Wanting a hen
to come by
and offer some
Sweet sounding yelps
Tom ran away
He must have...
caught my wind ???
He smelled bad
Because he farted
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
in her face
And she gagged
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
just like when
she choked on
those wild onions
that were growing
Have now died.
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
So, let's begin...
With another victim
who we'll call...
Died to death
Back to life
and everyone was...
Kung Fu Fighting
Fast as lightning
Then fell down
Started break dancing
Just like in....
A ghetto movie
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
To show later.
When they're older
and can handle
knowing the truth
sets you free
Until next lie
That you spin
In deep trouble
without any consequences
Off to jail
now a felon
Obama, Biden, Hillary
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
and don't forget
The Slickster himself
otherwise known as...
Old Mossy Head
With smallish frame
And eagle eyes
slipped silently away
Through the trees
Over the mountain
And far away.
To Grandmother's house....
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
and around the...
Yellow brick road
We're following it!!
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
It's long and...
Gettin' to it
Right after work
on the way
to a party
To get crunk!
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like Snoop Dog....
chasing that beard
across the hollow
down the valley
Following the creek
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
to the lake
Drop a line
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
from the dock
Catch a fish
Get it done.
Heading out for
Forgot my mask
have my gun
Don't have bullets
tackle that bird
Shoot it again
In the face
not the body
Head and neck
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Arm and leg
It got away
live another day
hunt again tomorrow
Get up early
Call in birds
took a nap
awoke to Gobbling
Drop the hammer
Step on head
Strike a pose...
In the diamond
Enjoy your encore
Do a dance
Get down tonight!
and again tomorrow
Away I go
you look ridiculous
But very stylish
what mom says
Is usually right
People do crazy
things, when drinking
and later regret...
moonwalking on the
very wet rocks
Fell on my
fat a$$ again
have good padding
To sit on.
Felt no pain
because drank again
We not men?
Are fish allowed?
Outside the pond
Without drinking water?
Swim in grease!
Fish and beer
Fries in oil
Drowned in vinegar
Salt and Ketchup
What about pepper?...
Is pepper spicy?
Just a tad
She said delightfuly!
With a grin
As she made
a jelly sandwich
Cause peanutbutter's gross!
crunchy with nuts?
Sweet and salty
Icecream and chips
gotta love mom
Dad was better
At fixing things
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Miss 'em both...
Shoot 'em up
Pour me another
One and done
One hit wonder
miracles do happen
Cleveland won championship
Two and through
let's start over...
no more Corona
Fat lady song
Three we'll see
6 feet apart
We shall stay
I recon so
Over the howler
Came an order
Wash Your Hands!
Twenty seconds more
In and out
In a hurry
to go somewhere
but getting nowhere
my wife says,
No turkey hunting
Sorry we're closed
We better open!
i'm going too
Hangout in woods.
and hope I...
call in Longbeards!
I'll use my...
Long box call
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
To reach out
And call them
"Here, turkey, turkey"....... :turkey2:
Get this Poon
Tang for free
Shake shake shake
Roger that Sir!
Sir Roger who?
that, Roy Rogers
Crispy roast beef
Cooked to long
It's little tough
To consistently kill
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
The elusive bird
who gets away
over the ridge
Into the holler
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
and across the
deep wide creek
where he can
Strut for the
Nesting boss hen
looking for cover
To hide out
protect the young
lock the doors
Load your gun!!
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Getting ready for
whatever may be
around the corner
From your blind
Be very quiet...
might see something
You don't like
Or like alot
not much anyway
could be more
just about empty
Top her off
Fill her up
over the top
now she's overflowing
barrel is full
Cask is empty
barrel may have
three shells inside
One was red
Two were yellow
They were empty
Wad was blown
Time to nap!!

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Can't follow that!!!
To the end
Of the race
The checkered flag
Was waved around
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
third base, i
will run home
with a score
Earn them victory
and a championship
The cheerleaders said
Take me home.
and spank my
Mother in Law
she deserves a
week off work
Said no one
What a switch
glad for change
from the liberals
you received money
waiting on deposit
Of lottery winnings
You didn't win
I never do
Nor could I
Just my luck
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
I'm broke now
But now I'm
Fat and lazy
The dang donuts
I'm a cop

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Real tough times
But Faith prevails
keep on praying
He will answer
He always does
He always will
May be no
Tomorrow's Another Day
work never ends
Keep on pushing
Through the tulips
Walked the florist
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
to the Roses
Down the hill
Around the bend
down she when
fast as lighting
Loud as thunder
raining so hard
Flooded my yard
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
over ankle deep
standing in mud
soaked to bone
Tired and drunk
Finally passed out
awoke by sound
loud and clear
the doorbell rang
And it was
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
next door neighbor
Acting kinda naughty
was it,, grandma
he started it
I'm telling mom!!
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
your in trouble
You'd better run
to the store
Pick up milk
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
eggs and bacon
Bread and grits
pay for it
who has money
Got to eat
those green peas
Which taste yummy
I'll have seconds
Through the creek
over the bank
Past credit union
next building over
Joe's Butcher Shop
out of beef
How about pork
Pickled pigs feet
with cold beer
I fell down
On my head
help me up
Help me fight
The good fight
who has gloves
no, not me,,,,,,
time to rest
work is done
time for fun
Family and friends
please use paypal..
just send cash
Very quickly please
and thank you
my pleasure Sir
being of service
Is my duty
For our country
United we stand
Stand for us
and support freedom
We will prevail
Until the end
God Bless America
Bless your heart
for your donation
please return mailer
Roll tide roll
ocean has waves
Water is wet
Skin is Waterproof
only one coat
Let it dry
But wear shoes
because it's cold
Warm it up
With a fire
and body heat
Get on up
get outta town
You've been evicted
on the street
without any belongings
Nowhere to go
but back home.
Forgot the key
To my pinto
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Need a Mustang
To haul
a heavy load
hit the fan
No gobbler again
Major league problem
Suck it up
Embrace the suck
feel the feeling
feel the burn
Use the cream
Let it sooth
Rub it in
less pain now
Feels so good
and it's sore
But healing well
no more itching
So don't scratch
that flea bite
was just irritating
His hairy back
Is pure disgusting
so she said
get off me
and get waxed
after car wash
Cruising down strip
I hit 60.....
Join the club
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Be a member
misery is company
Misery loves company
With broken ankles
And broken heart
Against all odds
They fought on
Pushed with gusto
finished the job
Ahead of schedule
time for fun
It's play time
Let's get it
finish up now
get cleaned up
and let's go
to the store
For paper towels
and toilet paper
and hand sanitizer
forgot, baby wipes
bread and milk
Eggs and ham
Pumpkin and spice
and everything nice
Noodles and rice
gravy and biscuits
No more food
Lets drink beer
I'll bring chips
who wants dip
Burgers and dogs
Daisy Dukes shorts
Show sweet cheeks :drool:
gotta, love that
Lets party girls
Grab the bottle
Shake that thing
Hold my beer
Wet Tee Shirts
all night long
Then on Monday
Rough getting started
dang,,overslepted again
Late to work
Lost my job
getting drunk now
don't give up!
keep on trying
and kick a$$
And take names
Write them down
Forget about it
mom,don't forget
Get her drinking
she'll stop thinking
And stop smoking
and get healthy
start running stairs
before you fall
on your butt
and ugly face
all cut up
bruised up too
From the fall
Broke some bones
fixed with tape
duct tape miracles
can hold about
anything you want
Can't get wet
With a umbrella
and your poncho
Get to it
paint the house
Cut the lawn
weed eat around
The back fence
Trees as well
My dog blue
best hound ever
Mississippi leg hound
chased a buck
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Across the river
the duck flew
over the trees
Landed in nest
with another duck
setting on eggs
Scrambled with bacon
Lettuce and tomatoes
on my bread
Onions, mustard, pickles
Sauce,lettuce,cheese
Thousand Island Dressing
taste real bad..........
Pickled mountain oysters
Ain't No Way!
who wants some
Covid19 cure all
Trump will find
A way to
Make hunting great
the day coming
spring turkey season
Right around corner
I can't wait
To talk turkey
an see one
on my plate
With mashed potatoes
mixed with butter
Gotta have corn
Don't forget gravy
smother that biscuit
pass the bowl
of cranberry sauce
is it homemade
Tasty apple butter
Spread on toast
jelly and jams
Hot apple pie
that mom made
with ice cream
Eaten with spoon
outside with friends
Crisp Fall evening
fire pit burning
Family and friends
All are welcome
bring your beer
Well kiss my
Grits old hag
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Meat and potato's.
Bread and butter
Sausage and biscuits
pass the mustard
Must have hotdogs?
i ask ,why..........
respond. why not?
Happy Father's Day !
Have great day
Dads are great
So are moms
Moms are yummy
helping dad cook
A terrific meal
Don't forget dessert
and fresh coffee
I prefer Monster
over other drinks
I love scotch
my primo drink
Went down easy
To the ground
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to throw up
That tasty nectar
so so sweet
Hugs from children
Treasure them dearly
memories are forever
So are photos
Kids and Grandkids
swimming pool cookout
Sunburn and aloe
Hard to sleep
Make the coffee
Awake all night
Starting to itch
Someone used bleach
On toilet paper
Use your hand
Not poison ivy
Frank Cox Trumpets
need contact information
company is closed
For today only?
Or perhaps forever
Nothing's for ever
please come on
one more time
Shoot a turkey
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Not a hen
Nor a jake
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Beard and Spurs
Long ones only
Now get ready
here he comes
Knock off safety
kill him dead
did i miss
Where'd he go
kick my butt
Choke too tight
for short distances
i passed out
Finally woke up
was i dreaming
About a turkey
before opening morning
All fanned out
twelve inch beard
Seven Inch Snood
with long spurs
3 inch spurs
Only one leg
only one eye
Banging into everything
while I walk
being very careful
To keep hidden
from his view
There he is
standing before me
Was a Gobbler
What a dream
To come true
Exactly the same
Not so quick
had to think
When to shoot
behind that tree
Stood a warden
are we trespassing
on your land?
should we run
Off to jail
One phone call
allowed to mom
not my lawyer?
Line is dead
switch is off
Not my day
Try again tomorrow
At 12 noon
After chasing poon
all night long
Woke up drunk
as smelly skunk
Stuck under truck
now flat tire
Need a tow
to the bar
For bourbon neat
i was thirsty
Drank some water
need a glass
Or a cup
who has one
Ask and see
Maybe you'll get
a clean one
or dirty one
Dirty nasty bird
Gyrating and flapping
to musics beat
and shotguns sweet
Fried turkey meat
goes with carrots
Bugs bunny food
lettuce and tomatoes
with salad dressing
And garlic croutons
Tasty bacon bits
On your salad
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Love ranch dressing
cheese and crackers
Hot Crab Dip
Spicy buffalo sauce
On chicken wings
And cold beer
love great american
Pizza whiskey beer
Heartburn Is Near!
i have tums
But missed mine
hope I'm next
wishing you luck
Get that Tom
with long spurs
Beards and hooks
around his neck
Was a big
chain and cross
Mr. T Turkey?
Crush his beak
Snipe his snood
breast him out
and marinate immediately
Blue cheese dressing
Buffalo Bills Rule
Not in football
Maybe Buffalo Wings?
With ranch dressing
and hot sauce
burns my eyes
unable to see
getting off track
Stop the train
hit the brakes
and embrace yourself
Know your mind
No one does
We are friendly
But are enemies
knock him out
with a left
Then stomp him
to a pulp
He will rise
will stand tall
your day's coming
Faster than ever
better be aware
Of the beast
Bear the burden
Work the problem
and give up
have a drink
Cold purified water
mountain spring water
cold refreshing taste
good for you
Not for some
with no taste
Insert flavor packet
turkey bouillon cubes
I like whiskey
Rock n Roll
Rhythm and Blues
pass the weed
Mow the grass
Weedeat the lawn
it's hot outside
I miss Winter
and hunting season
counting the days
go to work
Get job done
and play hard
get cleaned up
took a bath
Have a date
she is crazy
but very sexy
Not the one
Never the bride
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Never a groom
perhaps best man
drinking to much
Enjoyed the party
Time to split
Off to the
river through woods
chasing big bucks
Calling all turkeys
Like Indians did
In the day
Of great hunters
And unspoiled land
not coming back
Turkey we removed
calling all gobblers
and boss hens
To the yelps
strutting like gobblers
Fanning and strutting
in the bar
Playing video games
playing turkey calls
spitting and drumming
running and gunning
Quiet snood sniper
Drinking Wild Turkey
not while hunting
For safeties sake
you can leave
Bottle at door
Last round guys
We pass out
red solo cups
raise them up
Here's to the
Very best country
To live in
We are free
Four More Years!
God I pray.
help us all
God's in control
God Bless America!
We live free
until tax time
then we pay
double tax rate
Boston tea party
Make them listen
Vote them out
Time has come
four more years
Will Trump win
We all hope
Piss them off
We MUST Vote!
Yes, we do
We will prevail
U.S.A.
Those great initials
Best on earth
American Army Rangers
elite military fighters
God bless America
the buffalo roam
and will dominate
The hockey world
which will return
An Islanders cup
who shall win
the stanley cup
beer and popcorn
Rye and coke
Burgers and fries
Surf and turf
binikis and tan
Meat and 'Taters
Eggs and ham
Out of hell
Came screaming demons
playing that crystal
Screamin' Demon 2
who has one
I happen to
Know a little
about doing nothing
and being retired
is so relaxing
You can't imagine
Every day Saturday
every night friday
Month of Sunday's
makes four weeks
until vacation time
time flies by
old friends forever
good memories too
from the treestand
I hunt with
My best friends
and the family
best of times
had by all
till someone barfs
When they miss
It stings bad
Buy a butterball
pen raised gobbler
So much juicier
Turkey Tags dry
Receive conservation award
for habitat improvement
who's funding this
Not the NWTF
got your money
so you think
they want more
or possibly less
One more option
a tough decision
Not to hunt
In the rain
when lightning strikes
The Tom's gobble
answer His call
with hen box
Raise your gun
knock off safety
and gently squeeze
bug on nose
shoo fly shoo
Don't bother me
leave me alone
taking careful aim
drop the hammer
Good eating tonight
Lobster and Beer
Steak and sausage
Out of hell
to mother inlaws
she is jealous
A new babe
with long hair
Only it's pink
above the stink
Look, skunks den
call the trapper
He's late again
with my mail
expecting a call
from a Gobbler
or a hen
that's a chicken
In the pot
chicken and dumpling
Soup and sandwich
goes with icecream
And birthday cake
Count those carbs
Join a gym
break a sweat
lose some pounds
drink some calories
Wine will work
Bourbon is quicker
Top notch Scotch
tape for packages
Wow big swing
swings really high
And misses bigly
Take a base
He stole second
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what a play
need a replay
Ump was right
Next batter up
Hits a homer
Ties up game
sudden death playoff
for the championship
of all times
And hard times
WE will survive
Ain't No Doubt!
This is America...
Thriving and strong
numbers we stand
to be heard
We always win
Only Vote Republican
not for Democrat
Amen My Brothers!
Keep the faith
He better win
One historic vote
four more years
till i retire
You can't wait?
Not another day
I hear ya
come on over
the waters fine!
Take a swim
Or a hike
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and get lost
in her eyes..
It's coffee time
Hunt every day
enjoying the outdoors
exercising our freedoms
Always be free
To express yourself
that's our freedom
Must never waiver
Stay always vigilant
Stay the Course
Save the turkeys
lower bag limits
in your state
for better population
let the rabbits
have year off
Need more brush
remove more predators
Especially the coyotes
From the populus
Make more manageable
hours at work
success for all
that carry guns
In the woods
from the stand
cocked and loaded
ready for shootin'
Aimed down sights
Fire in hole
better run boy..
seal the deal
Right on target
Shot the Strutter
and the satellite
Under forty yards
What a day
Time for pictures
proud of him
hit a homer
bottom of ninth
Game on line
all bets down
You're a Winner!
What a night
We are champions
present the trophy
Time to party
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Cook a Pig
roast a turkey
Be safe friends
someone is watching
At all times
taking your picture
Recording your conversations
Wear tinfoil hats
you are strange
A little weird
and low speed
Stuck in gear
Can't get out
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trapped caged beast
Tarzan with boy
Beast of burden
Rolling Stones Concert
Out on tour
All been canceled
Who cares anyway
i sure do..........
No live music
Miss it myself
can't afford tickets
Real big money
Times are tougher
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Middle of HURRICANE
That's not good
Turkeys on ground
start calling now
Hopefully, they respond
with your email
Don't hold breath
They ain't coming
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Or are they
Nope, they're not.
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
I cooked extra
It's Miller time
Let's get drunk
Thanks, No Thanks
rather walk home
than drive drunk
Thats wise decision
he's passed out
Low blood sugar
your always sick
After turkey season
less turkeys now
Pandemic Inspired Enthusiasts
Making things worse
will get better
I hope so
have to work.......
like never before
Then we celebrate
with large cocktails
and snack foods
Chips and dip
Grill some Wings
Dip and eat
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
need more chips
Run to store
who's driving now
Driving Ms. Daisey
to see Mickey........
beautiful antique car
Prefer Muscle Cars
Mid Life Crisis
Whole life crisis!
Embrace the Years!
before you die
You gotta live
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Long and Prosper
Hunt our birds
Enjoy the day
woods coming alive
Birds are chirping
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Fly down time
Pull up mask
walk into bank,,,,,,,,,,
Drug out handcuffed...
Off to jail
making my hooch
and sampling it
Hows it taste
smooth as water
On windless day
you hear that
A distant gobble
Or another hunter
behind my tree.......
He is trespassing
Usher them out!
who has time
If it's yours......
can you stop
Keeping it safe
who cares anyway
alot should care
I certainly do
We all should
Think about it
For how long
longs it takes
I'm so tired
of the nonsense
in todays world,,,,,,,,,,,
GOD Bless America!
Land of free
Home of brave
God we trust
I pledge allegiance
To our flag
Of the United
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States of AMERICA
and the republic
for which it
Stands one nation
Nation under God
Who's broad stripes
and bright stars
The perilous fight
O'er the ramparts
We watched,were
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So gallantly streaming
And the rocket's
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Red glare bombs
bursting in air
We must vote
pick right person
Country at stake
GOD PLEASE HELP
Our country needs
to stand up
Save the land
for future generations
To enjoy freedom
and live prosperous
Now to eternity
life after death
Only Through GOD
Lord and Savior
Ament to all
So Be It
Time to choose
softball team players
I'm a fan
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who's up next
Who's on third
I don't know...
In the dugout
having a beer
and some peanuts
and more BEER........
and whiskey shots
I'm feeling dizzy
Gonna pass out
sleep it off
and resume tomorrow
Wake to hunt
shoot a bird :turkey2:
Two Inch Spurs!
What a dance!
Time for pictures
use your thumb..
Hit the safety
squeeze the trigger
Flopping on ground
broke my toe
dam that hurt
Shouldn't have ran
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Tripped over log
Chipped my toof
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Need Dentist appointment
NO I'm strong
Good to go
Turkey hunter tough
wet my pants
water waist deep
now titty deep
No life jacket
I'm in trouble
Barely treading water
leg cramp help
Toe cramps worse
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need pain pill
Log floats by
Can't catch it
with my net,,,,,,,,,,,
or my rod
Swim to shore
Gotta get dry
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Before hypothermia sets
then, a cocktail
Gotta pray first
Then pull cork
from wine bottle
and drink up
man that's good
Came with steak
and baked potato
And sour cream
and Shrimp Cocktail
made me sick.........
ralphing all over
cold towel please
Real bad indigestion
past the tums,,,,,,,,,
Feeling better now
Ready to roll
Ready to rumble
in the streets
looking for trouble
because i'm mad.......
ready to fight
Bust some skulls!!!
like these liberals?
Works for me
Real tough times
Larder getting low
Tempers getting High
about to explode
At fever pitch
Maintain our freedom
don't show weakness
Stay the course!
make right turn
and pull over
Heard a gobble
Off to hunt
Here we go!
lure him in
and get ready
Don't you move
snake on leg..........
please don't bite
tickles me slowly
Near sensitive parts
grab it now
Heard some drumin'
snake is gone
where is it........
in the bush
Flush him out
Whack his head
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need big stick
Tread lightly
the turkey left
Saw stick swinging
and missed again
Heard the rattle
turkey gobble again
come in strutting
Gobbling whole way
Ready for Business
gun on knee
crosshairs on neck
Click off safety
had a misfire..........
old Winchester shell
better get APEX
Shot size nine
shoots mighty fine!
Price to high
for that call,,,,,,,,,,
cost doesn't matter
We love turkey
And turkey hunting
Amen to all
can't put price
Our sport priceless
wife finds out..
then I'm done
Hide the calls
NEVER hide calls
Play when Alone
all year long
Practice makes perfect
not for me,,,,,,,
The last call
NO , buying more
Love the woods
stop hunting fields
Hunt big woods
i get lost
call a friend
Dial a ride
Who's driving now
Driving Miss Daisy
to the bank
another river crossing
Take the bridge
Old Home Place
Old Times Shared...
turkey hunting stories
flying outta mouths
Shakin' the Shack!
Who's telling these
bleeding heart liberals
leave liberals out
oh heck yeah!
Love the forum
great learning place
for all hunters
and wannabes too
need help calling
Can always improve
my calling skills
Need more practice
to be like?
Always can improve
Trick that Longbeard
into coming close
Hit with arrow
Maybe my Crossbow
feathers or vanes
Feathers for recurve
use turkey feathers
Use three fletch
one fell off...
back to vanes
who made these
Flaky buttery biscuits
Was not me
Hardees made them
made from scratch
tenderloin biscuit please
Shrimp and gritts
Love some grits
no grits please
Pancakes and sausage?
Making me hungry
off to Arby's..
Then back hunting
Til closing time
Gettin' after 'em!
At first light
don't over sleep
Alarm clock's set
Don't forget glasses
Vibrate Cell Phone
Opps, dead battery
Just my luck
Still might work
Just call Turkeys...
Here he comes
sit super still
he's looking for
That super calling
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while i draw
Let her fly
watch him die
Where the arrow lies
no tracking necessary
Met his Dr.
He was expensive
Took a loan
for the invoice
bill past due
spent my money
On turkey calls
And Tss shells
Skipping lunch awhile
feeding the habit
Caused a divorce
Now I'm broke
Eat some ramen
with green peas
turkey hunting time
Right around corner
No Fall Season...
that's a bummer
make it happen
maybe in Virginia
wish you luck
Have fun friend
be careful traveling
Will Do Brothers!
Get to it
Time is wasting
Now's the time
To practice calling
call mom first
before fall season
Rut is coming
Should be fun
hunting and camping
Time with friends
Is most precious
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Making Those Memories
That last forever
take some pictures
save the memories
and make more
Great turkey photos
Toast the success
celebration among hunters
far and wide
missed a kick...
light load shells
for small game
and young hunters
they are excited
They are future
hunting and fishing
Living the dream!!!
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Wake me up
need coffee first
none for me
till i poop
eat some prunes
Would rather not
maybe some raisins
I prefer blueberries
muffins and hunting
Boil eggs hunting
taking toilet paper!
Are muffins bran?
walking in hunting
in the dark
Tripped on roots
Fell on stump
Gear flew everywhere!
I am done
Pooping in woods
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Forgot toilet paper
only forget once
leafy clean up
Now back hunting
for the slammer
Look gobbler tracks
J Shaped Poop
down the road
I use locator
yelping and cutting
purring some too
that's him gobbling
find a tree
Almost fly down
Getting really excited
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Take safety off
Slowly squeeze trigger
when on target
just couple steps
He'll line up
drop the hammer
Need bread crumbs
To find way
Back to truck
take a nap...........
Have Gobble Fever
see the doctor
doctor doesn't hunt
He's clueless then...
One bad diagnosis
Can ruin season
just keep trying
Never stop hunting
Making turkeys talk
is my favorite
Striker on slate
Produces turkey talk
Mellow to Fellow
hunters getting down
after missing him
get another shot
He's coming back
Nock another arrow
give him another
shot behind shoulder
He jumped string
bobbing and weaving
can't keep still!
need more food,,,,,,,,,
I'm still hungry
Stay on diet!
don't need diet
pass a beer
Tap the keg
that's cold beer
Skip the foam
angle the mug
pull the tap
time to leave
One and done
Just one more
chance yelp yelp
hear him walking........
Spitten and drummen
here he comes
Don't blow it
Pull back flint
hold your breath
here he comes
Now he's gone
Damn he left
without paying money
We got stiffed
Dine and Dash...
I can't run
without foot wear
Stepped on rattler
Did snake strike
yep...but missed!
Lopped his head
he's not moving
Still can bite
just keep walking...
Watch your step
Droppings on path
Not from him
Maybe a bear
shotgun is loaded
Ready to smokem
Grab my call
Find a tree
You gonna climb?
He's slipping around
that big rock.........
Just see waddle
Shoot Antifa scumbags!!!
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
time for reckoning
Four More Years!
Prayers needed now
Keep America Great!
We will prevail
so let's vote
Win Donald win
Get Well Soon!
We hope so
Darn no idea
let's hope so
Tough times now
Full bore ahead
"Damn the torpedo's"
Lock and Load
Here it comes
straight and fast
Stay on target!
Have to focus
On the crosshair
target lethal zone
Aim center mass
sights are off
dial em in
out of shells
Run to shop
They're out again
People are hoarding
I hate those
apex has more
load 'em up!
Fill the clip
Lock and load
ready to fire
ask dad first,,,,,,,,,,,,,
what gun son
My old betsy
Fill the frizzen
Check the flint
cock the hammer
Squeeze the trigger
Thee smoke clears
Where he go
Laying on ground
Ready to gut
Got my buck
Take some pictures!
Sun behind camera
A perfect focus
what a hunt
biggest deer ever
time for pictures
Get the camera
And whiskey bottle
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and scotch glass
time for celebration
Of good times
With good friends
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making good memories!
time for bed
Good Nights sleep
morning hunt planned
Might get rain
hope it snows
just 3 inches
What she said
Cause she knows
Why so small
Still a jake
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Beard will grow
I hope so
size does matter
With spur length
and beard girth
Bigger is better
one fat gobbler
Reddy for harvest
Cooking for dinner
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Pass the gravy
and the dressing
Tap the keg
and pour one
Get juices flowing
To have fun
One and done
Just one more
truck want start
no cell service
need electric bike
long walk out
look gobbler tracks
getting very excited
season opens tomorrow
Ready to go
Can't sleep now
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because so excited
Roosted a gobbler
for the morning
forgot the clock
It's cracking daylight
what to do?
Hurry up fool
Get ready fast
Load the gun
and set up
Ready to call
Silence is Deafening
Yelp yelp yelp
I heard a gobble.
Down by the
He flew down
It's game time!
Kick the ball!
And run fast
Bumped bee hive
running and gunning
on the chase
To the bank
down the creek
Over the log
water is deep
Gators are approaching
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Better move back
To the bank
down the trail
better than up
Tree with noose
keep on going
in a hurry
To get there
Can't be late
Got a date
with big gobbler
work him up
which call now
the crow call
That's him gobbling
He's close now
shoot his pecker
bang he's flopping
Plum dog dead
MAN i'm excited
Time for pictures
hooks and beard
Wings and things
dressing and gravy
Cranberries and giblets
Hot apple pie
Sweet potato Casserole
Linguini Clam Sauce
Alaskan King Crab
deep sea fishing
for wicked Tuna
off N.C. Coast
boat broke down
stranded in water
And can't swim
waiting on TOW
wind picking up
sweet,, sea sickness............
I'm gOnna puke
not feeling good
stomache is rolling
back and forth
Up and down
make it stop
Throw the anchor
need some relief!
take some pepto
that really helped
my queasy stomach
gotta get in
A better mood
Find a snood
And pepper it
With #6 shot
Apex is better
Dead is dead
That's for sure
if you hunt
Whenever body allows
enjoy every minute
All week long
rain is forecasted
Wait them out
long afternoon hunt
time for nap..........
one eye open....
squeeze very lightly
Hold your breath
one more time
Don't miss shot
Aim very careful
Send him one!
wait wait wait
Get on him
When he fans
Don't shoot until
Hurry...gotta pee!!!
Be very still
he's turning now
Slowly make adjustments
He caught movement
There he goes
back to momma
mommas baby boy
Has some luck
I'm chasing him
taking to wing!
over next ridge
Off our property
calling from here
make it count!
shoot his pecker
gun misfired dam
Poof he's gone
just like that!
I'm so frustrated
Need new gun
maybe shoot better
And slot straiter
Clean the barrel
buying new shells
not the arrow...
Maybe the broadheads?
shortage of supplies
Can't find anything
Phone a Friend
Forgot the number
Darn it anyway
I'm still looking
Going to reload
some hunting bullets
Have Nosler Boattails
They should work
if i reloaded
but I don't...
wife stops me.....
From doing it
Give her ring
He already did
It didn't help
Don't give up
keep on pumping
Till empty chamber
Reload that puppy
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and let loose
He might be down
but be ready
Just in case
he jumps up
And starts running
give him one!
In the head
Now he's dead
Time to appreciate
Take good photos
alot fun memories
Of great hunt
and good eatin'...
Shared with friends
and family too
Make a toast
and be merry
celebrate good times
and future hunts!
And forever peace
With loved ones
And their families
sure sounds nice!
It sure does
Happening Thanksgiving everywhere
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Happy Veterans Day!
Thank them all
For their sacrifice
Some Paid All!
All gave some
Dues paid forever
Some gave all
To stay free
The fight continues
Keep guard up
And strong faith
will help us
GOD In Control!
Threw it all
away very quickly
And they left
Not to return
for many days
wind has blown
trees fell down
Shingles were torn
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yard's a mess
Lots of work
and no play
Mess can wait
time to go
Back in woods
Listening for gobbles
And good location
to ambush one
within killing range
Make shot count
Shells are expensive
T.he S.pecial S.auce
is Absolutely ausome
Worth the price
not my ford
I like chevys
Made in America
Top to bottom?
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Side to side
Inside and Out
down and under
The whole thinh
keep moving it
Till you connect
That big ole
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Long beard gobbler
Will haunt dreams
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time to hunt
Get my cloths
were my gun
and my bullets
Off the shelf
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load the truck
Crap no gas
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Woman forgot again!
Credit Card Missing
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Darn my luck
Hitch a ride
Up the mountain
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Down the holler
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Not seeing much
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Time to move
wait a minute
I heard something
Could be something
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Coming our way
and get ready
Heard him again!
He's gobbling strong!
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It's a jake
what a disappointment
Like the election
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Nothing that bad
It might be
time for bed
hunting again tomorrow
Hope it's better
Cold moving in
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get out there
Get some venison
Shoot next time
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Make it count
Please don't miss
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make the shot
But a squirrel
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Was break dancing
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after many acorns
Then passed out
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don't fall back
In the crap
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Cause it stinks
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On your boots
And everything else
Has gotta go
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good cover scent
And it's organic
if you hunt
for tweety birds
Go out early
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be very patient
listen and learn
Put on camo
And face mask
Be very still
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Very limited movement
didn't hear one
New place tomorrow
Getting slim pickens
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Finding new place
for my treestand
On the river
in the valley
Great natural funnel
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to snipe one
now let's hide
Wait for brutus
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He will show..
I hear something
it's not brutus.......
it's just bambi
Let him grow
Into a trophy
then get him
to walk by......
Then kill him
That's the plan!
Never works out
Someone else will
Screw it up
and move out
Can't give up...
Need Turkey meat
freezer getting low
plug it in........
If it'll run
It's running fine
Time to hunt!
Gas the truck
Get that buck
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with the coffee
forgot my backpack
Darn the luck
just need gun
And some shells
Boots laced tight
foot turned blue......
loosen those laces
Gangrene sets in
need iodine fast
To help heal
It still hurts
suck it up
You are tough
Medicine will help
With the cough
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another beer, please
pass the bottle
Of good stuff
for another swigger
Black Berry Brandy
back to hunting
Heard a Gobble
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Gotta get closer
don't bump him
with the atv.......
Leave it home
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Take Quiet Cat
heard him again...
On the ridge
behind the house
Down the wash
In the thicket
Behind creek bottom
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See him now
work on him
To call in
for the job........
let's go silent
might be best
To talk soft
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Or scratch leaves
have more patience
In shot range
plaster the head
are you sure
You are ready
Squeeze don't pull
Knock off safety
please don't miss
Or else he
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Will get away
And be educated
Spreading the word
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don't go there
An educated turkey
what a challenge
We will have
a great day
In the woods
In the blind
Up against tree
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Fell Asleep again
slept till noon.......
dreaming of gobblers
And 2 inch spurs
and multiple beards
Four at least
37 pounder wow
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That's a mammoth!
it's a gobbler
Boone and Crockett
All the way
Coax him in
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A little closer
draw back slowly
Settle the pin
Release the arrow
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Right on target
Short tracking job
get the knife
Cook and eat
Enjoyed the hunt
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It's cocktail time
Lemon Drop Martini
Tea for me
planning next hunt
have another drink
Stop getting trashed
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time for bed
Up at dawn
One TAG left
before all gone
Last day chance
make it count!
Very last chance
Knock him down
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squeeze the trigger
Call the taxidermist
Hang it up
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new shotgun first
New turkey vest
New Marlin fiddlebox
New Lyman strikers
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wish i had.....
Buster pot call
Grab it now
Make it sing
Talk to Him!
Coming ona string
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behind a tree
Damn can't shoot
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Stay real still...
Till he clears
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That last bush
I spooked him
pickin my nose.......
Picked a winner
No turkey dinner
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For you fool
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hunt another day
And never quit
Do not concede
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No not ever
You will prevail
Stay on task
To finish job
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I'm hunting tomorrow
In the snow
Here comes big
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boy sneaking through
Leaving many tracks
As he goes
up the hill
Out of sight
Now be patient
Here he comes
Strutting and gobbling
walking into range
Under 40 yards
Like a dream
Bang, flop, done
It's cocktail time
tag finally filled
Trophy for sure!
Can't wait untill
The taxidermist bill
Is due meaning
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I'm broke NOW
Can't buy ammo
truck needs gas
May be walking
To work tomorrow
Got weekend off
Time to play
name the game
running turkey calls
Practice makes Perfect
Never be perfect
regardless keep practicing
To get better
must work hard
To get there.
But you will
Succeed when committed
worth the effort
Reap the reward
Enjoy the success
raise your glass
celebrate your hunt
Thank the Lord
Accomplish your mission
Appreciate the hunt
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Blessed with Nature
And great outdoors
God sure knew
Supplies our Needs
In our souls
And our harts
God will provide
As he wills
planning next adventure
In his hands
chasing more gobblers
In new country
need to find.....
good turkey habitat
And roost trees
and good hides
To shoot from
Double Bull Blind
Or a Barronett
Or build one
to conceal movement
A ghillie suit
Will Hide you.
Make you itch
just scratch it
Make it better
Maybe poison ivy
Or perhaps Sumac?
or poison oak
need some lotion
To rub on
The infected spot
all better now
Ready to hunt!
forgot my permit........
driving back home
here we go...
Gonna be late
For the show
breaking daylight fast
Step it Up!
He's on ground
Find cover fast!
soft calling now
Here he comes
draw a bead
Drop the hammer
wait wait wait
A bearded hen...
What's that smell?
Old rotting eggs
Someone passed gas
thought was alone
keep on moving
Smell will pass
that's gobbler dropping
under my foot..........
Legs in hand
Get a Picture
Of that dude
Who is trespassing
call the sheriff
and bring Barney.......
For a Haircut
And a shave
Floyd the Barber
And don't forget
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to tip generously
Give twenty percent
hunting money first
Is more important
let's turkey hunt
in the spring
trees turn green
Bird sing more
owls and whippoorwills
start sounding off
In the morning
Before Fly down
In the spring
We hunt gobblers
in the woods
On the mountain
Near the streams
in the fields
Out of state
Public land hunting
Could be dangerous
don't tell wife..........
getting another rifle
and nice scope
For long range
Set of binos
Good objective view
Out of focus
clear your mind......
Don't look twice
Might second guess
The parties involved
are not right
In the head
what a shot
Collect your trophy!
Call the taxidermist
waiting after season
Three months away
Four for me
April is coming
shotgun is ready
Turkeys are aplenty
lets get going
Ready to Rumble
turkeys are gobbling
and a strutting
get your gun
set up quickly
start soft calling
I hear drumming
IT"S behind me
Red, white, blue
raise the flag,,,,,,,,,,,,
IN FULL STRUT
Time to smoke
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Him without delay
well alright then!
Over the shoulder
Outta the woods
truck want start
out of gas
Tough, long walk
no cell service
what to do,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Continue to scout
need some water
How about beer
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Water will do
Off to Unicoi
Will leave bankrupt
But call rich
what a show
forgot the popcorn,,,,,,,,
Go to video
cam battery dead
Darn what now
CALL a friend
just for fun
See what happens
looking for gobblers
With long spurs
And thick beards
need to trim,,,,,,,,,,,
Now a jake
Looked much older
Made a mistake
Killed a jake
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get the grill
Time to eat...
Love those breasts
fried with gravy
And new potatoes
And good Cabernet
or a Merlot
Toast successful hunt
in new camo
with hunting friends
on a saturday
Evening starry skies
Rain for tomorrow
I'm still hunting
No matter what
If I Can
Then I will
Why we live
to love someone....
and hunt turkeys
all day long
In every state
Where we can
Chase the monarch
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Of the woods
in his house
on his terms
On his turf
In his world
And his domain
Under his roost
Against a tree
waiting in hopes
he shows up
All puffed up
In full strut
Ready for Action!
Pull the trigger
Fill out tag
Season is done
Life is good
Right around corner
Another great hunt
very successful season
It's cocktail time!
Fill up shaker
Bourbon on ice
glass of tea
And some lemon
That also works
planning next season
Never too early
getting to work,,,,,,
Practice them calls
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Have been already
To get started
Since last season
Dreaming about turkeys
Making more Memories
With hunting buddies
I didn't read through all the pages, but...............
:welcomeOG:
To his roost
slipping while dark
finding a hide
And seek player
Willing to cooperate
But not play
little tree talking
And wing beating
man I'm nervous
he can fly
down to me
Within thirty yards
Take the shot
When you can
deposit the check............
Please don't bounce
need turkey shells
Better call apex
T.he S.pecial S.auce
Pickles, cheese, onions
on my burger
making me hungry
scouting before breakfast
In the morning
Take a gobbler
one didn't gobble
Came in silent
About made me
wait for it
To go hunting
With my kid
Took bad shot
second shot needed
He is down
what a blessing
Appreciate the experience
Never Gets Old
long walk back
Turkey over shoulder
And he's heavy
Deep fried nuggets
time to eat
Calling at dawn
Put em asleep
Hearing a Gobble
On the limb
across the valley
Ready to pitch
But wait what's...
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someone else calling
Hen yelps back
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Might be bad
Listen to this
Now a jake
Came running in
Head straight up
Ready to fight
The boss tom
Ready to fight
bring on Rocky,,,,,,,,
And Bullwinkle also
He's the man
Big Ol' Tom
Come strutting in
All faned out
NO Jake's Coming
Just one tom
Has no beard
He Roosted Where ?
Jake runs in
pecks the decoy.......
All fluffed up
pass on Jake's
wait for longbeard
Tom woops jake
Son of gun
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Feathers went everywhere
did i miss,,,,,,,
You got him
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He's plum dead
It's cocktail time!
Wild Turkey Bourbon
Celebrate good times
and memories made!
For another season
Visit the taxidermist
Honor that bird
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A trophy feast
Of roast beast.
fried turkey breast
tastes the best!
After the hunt
With loved ones
And hunting buddies
that don't drink,,
That much beer
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after the hunt
In the evening
I like to
shoot my bow
At the range
Pattern my Remington
Got her shooting
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straight on target
At forty yards
and within it
Twenty five is best
Closer the better
Make the shot
place the bead
Point of aim
Right on waddle
Let her rip
go get him
Before he rolls
Pin him down
Before the flop
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Safety on please
Empty out chamber
Has nice hooks
sure are sharp...........
Wow, four beards
And two peckers
Hard to believe
A limb hanger
Loaded with ticks
Better be careful
You'll catch something
Dreaded turkey disease
Lured byda bird
I guess so
Gonna think positive!
Get out there
With Dr. Juice
He'll show you
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all the tricks
against her will
Go to jail
That's no fun
Let's Turkey hunt
Out of Hades
into the woods
forgot my compass,
Used the sun
Now I'm stranded
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Darn the luck
Always go south
Spooked off limb
Son O Gun
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There he goes
Hold your fire
It's a hen
with a beard
But no spurs
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Let it go
Until another day
Next year Tom
Will be gobblin
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On same roost
Early every morning
Mocking me extensively
Flyovercutdowncackleputt works best
I guess so
Gotta be so...
you say so.........
Yep I do
What the hell
Where is he?
In the tree
make soft yelps
To coax him
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Didn't even sitdown
Here he came
Up the ridge
That fence though
He'll duck under
To greet the
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Sweet little hen
He'll love it
Oops
He saw my
Shiny white hand
Working my calls
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getting my gloves
Taking off safety
But I realized
Gun not loaded
my biggest mistake.......
Oops got away
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Darn it anyway
Maybe better tomorrow
With new plan
And better camo
Here he comes
Drop the hammer
pickup the screwdriver...........
Time to go
Back to work
Get bird two
In new state
Pack your gear
With good stuff
and Good Luck!
Alarm clock set
With battery backup
phone .willn't work
What to do
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Park at gate
Getting gear ready
Time do this
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Long walk in
Pretty steep hills
The climb begins
My left boot
Pass fifteen hunters...
Oops kinda busy
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Planning my strategy
To new spot
I hear one!
He's real close
Find a tree
Gave a yelp
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fifteen hunters near
Lots of answers
Scratch in leaves
I hear drumming
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Oh the excitement
Of him coming
To the call
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In Full Strut
A hen appears
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A wardens watching
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So stay cool
Better not shoot
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A bearded hen
because she knows
You can't shoot
Hens don't strut
Hens can strut
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Seen em gobble
up some clover
In the field
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Down the road
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On the left
There he is
down over there
Near the creek
He flew across
Darn it anyway
Too a hen
Call the hen
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With the trumpet
Maybe she'll come
Drag him with
Her back over
Backside of couch
Here they come
Start calling lightly
got their attention
The Tom's gobbling
Come here bigboy
Hen is pissed
And clucking loudly
Now she's cutting
She going whoop
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And he's gobbling
Hen is looking
Maybe they'll come
Can only hope
For good success
Practice your calling
Participation trophy anyone?!!!!!!!!!!!
Only for Paulmyr.
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
he's the man
In his mind

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
NOW THAT"S FUNNY :TooFunny:
I'd say so
you did what,,,
I sure did
Change his diaper
Nasty ole job
Wow how gross
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It's smells terrible
did somebody fart?
I hope not
Ugh get away
you are rotten
Sumpin bad inside
Released the toxins
get a match
You can strike
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No your out
Down you go
Up the steps
to the kitchen
For a cup
Of hot chocolate
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Can't on diet
Then have cofee
Or maybe tea
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regardless it's good
That's for me
fix me another
Not so hot
need some ice
And cold brews
to toast success
to my divorce
Perhaps a shot
in my arm
Not from government
No not ever
That shits crazy
we stand together
All for one
One for all
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out of stock
Out of time
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NO days off
Not even Sundays
Time for retirement
Retirement is great
Live it up
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more beer ,please
And a shot
Over served again
I'm cut off
taxi ride home
Was very slow
But you there
what a ride
It was boring
what was wrong
world was spinning
way to fast
Made me hurl
Almost fell again
Having another drink
Not this time
Have had enough
stomach is full
Brain is empty
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Can't think now
Ka Monnn Mann :funnyturkey:
Yeah what's up
Doc? You know
No I don't
It's Turkey Season!
On the Brain,,,,,,,,
In the soul
in my blood
Ran a passion
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Deep deep down
In my bones
To my toes.
need better boots
Clipping my toenails
Job well done
Until I heard
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What's that smell?
cooking BBQ ribs
with side salad
And creamed corn
and baked beans
Toasted buttered cornbread
With sweet tea
Good and cold
Quenched my thirst
YES! My first.
That was good.
I'll have another
Got any lemon?
and one sugar
Yes I do.
I need two
Bottles of beer
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Ohhh My Deer
It's getting late
She said with
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Beer goggles on
It's turkey season
No she didn't :TooFunny:
Really why not
Because she wont.
The BBQ ended,
yes everyone leaving
Get outta here
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Let's go hunt
I have chores /:
They can wait
Yep lets go
Meet you there
In the pines?
On the Hill
By the Boulder?
With a drink
Cold Mountain Dew
Sounds real good
On Summer afternoon.
One day in..........
The Rocky Mountains
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Hunting a turkey
NO hunting gobblers
BIG NASTY Gobblers!
With huge hooks
and long beard
To trip over
I'm still chasing
the big boy
Stay Hell Out!
Of my area
Or you'll pay
10 gold dollars
no credit cards
Will be accepted.
At any time
Gobblers can appear
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when least expected
At any time
Morning or evening
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Some times midday
Even the night
With ski masks!
And sporting daggers
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pistol is loaded
where's my glasses,,,,,,,,,
On my dashboard
Damn their cracked
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Use them anyway
Shoot middle tom
He yelled loudly
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CLICK! Utttt Ohhh
Forgot to load
Costly rookie mistakes
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Taste real good
Like it should
Here we go
on the road
to see mom,,,,,,,,,,,
Hope she cooked
white beans cornbread
pot of collards
And a ham
And buttermilk biscuits.
Smothered in gravy
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Southern sweet tea
I'll have another
Pass the beans
To the left.
what a meal
What's for desert?
Squirrel brain stew
And mountain oysters
hot blueberry cobbler
With ice cream
Gimme the stew.
While its hot
It's so good
But too spicy
There's none left
Time to go
For a walk..
In the woods
But I forgot
my side arm
I'm going back..
To get it
might need it
for a showdown
With Rocky Raccoon
And his gang
Of malevolent thugs
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
I need a posse!
Quote from: TrackeySauresRex on April 29, 2021, 08:24:37 AM
I need a posse!
That's 4 words!!!

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Quote from: RutnNStrutn on April 29, 2021, 02:20:00 PM
Quote from: TrackeySauresRex on April 29, 2021, 08:24:37 AM
I need a posse!
That's 4 words!!! 
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
^^^ Ouch! Busted again.. :TooFunny:
Gotta start over
At the beginning
In the woods
In th morning
Ready to hunt
A little turkey :funnyturkey:
load my gun
Need toilet paper
Should have remembered
But forgot it
that really stinks
Stay up wind
One sock off ;D
Airing toes out
Feels so good
To wipe clean.
Oh no snake
Be very careful
Foot will blister
If not protected
wear good socks
And comfortable boots
Foot pain sucks!!!
All pain sucks
But one day
I'll carry Charmin
Don't touch it
It don't work
You hear that?
Yep I did
Uh oh, its
a boss hen
She sounds angry!
Ready to fight
Keep mimicking her.
Now she says
where are you?
You little twerp
Show your self
I'm over here
behind my mother,,,,,
Behind her skirt
Now it's time,
To stay invisible
Or walk away.
Danger is near
In your face
Here she comes
Where's the tom
strutting behind her
That's not him...
Then that means...
It's his Brother.
From another mother.
Or a cousin
But either way
He can dance
Strut that stuff
He looks goofy :newmascot:
Light him up !
Aiming the bead...
For the head
Good sight picture
Pull the trigger
Right now man
He will run
Not if aimed
In right place
1...2...3..
Down he goes
see him flop
in the pot!
Back at home
With my kin
In the graveyard
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i dig hole
To bury it
Out of sight
Out of mind
To be forgotten.
Never seen again
In this lifetime.
Or the next
For that matter
hope to return
to the beginning
A fresh start ;D
I guess so
Make it count
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live life right
count your blessing
And be thankful
for all creations
Its your choice
To choose which
one you want
To talk to.
About all things
Not just Hunting.
but living life
Happily ever after
Let one walk
Buy Them Boots....
I love where this turned the last couple of pages!
Quote from: TrackeySauresRex on May 30, 2021, 12:38:57 PM
Buy Them Boots....
I love where this turned the last couple of pages!
you mean snake boots
Quote from: hotspur on May 30, 2021, 03:45:36 PM
Quote from: TrackeySauresRex on May 30, 2021, 12:38:57 PM
Buy Them Boots....
I love where this turned the last couple of pages!
you mean snake boots
^ 4 words! :goofball:
watch your step
You never know
Quote from: TrackeySauresRex on May 30, 2021, 09:35:47 PM
Quote from: hotspur on May 30, 2021, 03:45:36 PM
Quote from: TrackeySauresRex on May 30, 2021, 12:38:57 PM
Buy Them Boots....
I love where this turned the last couple of pages!
you mean snake boots
^ 4 words! :goofball:
Trackey busted you!!

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
What is beyond
Quote from: RutnNStrutn on May 30, 2021, 10:58:42 PM
Quote from: TrackeySauresRex on May 30, 2021, 09:35:47 PM
Quote from: hotspur on May 30, 2021, 03:45:36 PM
Quote from: TrackeySauresRex on May 30, 2021, 12:38:57 PM
Buy Them Boots....
I love where this turned the last couple of pages!
you mean snake boots
^ 4 words! :goofball:
Trackey busted you!! 
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
[. I knew it. .... :funnyturkey:
The stars overhead?
sky is clear
LOOK! A spaceship..
Spaceship filled with
food and water
Need ammo too
out of stock
at any price
At every store
In every state
This is insane
out on line
this is Crazy
will people stop
Absolutely not ever!!
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
In this life
or here after
it won't happen
Unless.... the unthinkable
Happens to come
It's gonna happen
who thinks so
I think so
Let's do this
Over and over
do it right
don't break it
Or shake it
Make it new
Like it was
i need glue
To fix it
i hope so
Duct tape works
And is better
Than super glue
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
so use tape
Across your lips!!

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
That did it
Or did it?
who did what
You ain't heard?
The whole story
please tell me
I am listening
It's truly traumatizing
for scared people
Who play hopscotch
Late at night
Or four Am
you still up
Better get sleep
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Daylight comes early
At this time
get out there
I'm so tired
I'm fired up
let's go then
Meet you there
I'll bring shiners
I got beer
you bring snacks
I got worms
we're about ready
to go fishing
Going to get
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my tackle box
Be right back
I'll be waiting
time to go
It's getting late
We'll go bullfrogging
If it's late
who will know
So anything goes
Then let's party
All night long
An into morning
with our friends
And the ladies
All them ladies
Young and old
I'm feeling good
and feeling lucky
Get er done
Just be careful
and use protection
thanks for reminding
Don't want STD
need blue pill
Too keep going
what a night
But my back
Bucket mouth bass
fishing is great
when not working,,,,,,,,,,
Or turkey hunting
on the weekend
With my buddies
need a boat
From shore works
I'll bring minnows
Scouting while fishing ?
no just relaxing
Catching speckled perch
Frying them up!!
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Nice beer batter
With homemade fries
and hush puppies
Love potatoe salad
And deviled eggs
Love macaroni salad
Yuck that's nasty
not this one
Need better cook
how's the taste
Macaroni Salad's Great
not on menu
You missed it.
more tea please
Love sweet tea!
who really care's
The tea company
And it's costumers
Sweet tea yummy
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another glass please
With more ice
and no lemon
that was refreshing
Yes it was
Need another one
Got to pee
Beside a tree
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
what a snake
I scared myself
and then some
Thing bit my
Big fat toe
Now turning blue
And smelling like.....
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Honey bbq fritos
Then fell off
into mud hole
Three second rule
Kind of chewy
a little crunchy
taste like chicken
Good with beer ?
I don't drink!
are you thirsty
for sweet tea
Are you serious?
You know it
I know what?
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
You the man
I know that!!

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Because the shades?
are to dark
but future bright!
Killin huge gobblers
Hope to get more.
More of what
More sweet tea
And nanner pudding!!!
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
that's good stuff
With out without
lot's of wafers
I prefer with
My lady friend
Who's the boss? ;)
Miss that show
Late at night
Flying a kite
Struck by lightning

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Cotton eyed joe
Drank sweet tea
NO MORE TEA
It's country time
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In the South
Up a holler
Not to Far
Use a locater
If you can
To find us
look in phonebook...........
Train whistle works
Hoot hoot hoot
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train is rolling
Coal is rollin
need a shovel
To bury liberals
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Down really deep
into the ground
in the desert
Where rios roam
Strutting down road
And gobbling alot
They shut up
what a day
missed my nap,,,,,,,
woke up hungry
so I ate
Some protein bars
and drank milk
Then got choked
On badger milk
Fell to ground
Died right there
sure hate it
Could be better
Now in heaven
or in hell
Like that gobbler
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Old mossy head
chasing the hens
in clover field
Ready to mount
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old boss hen
For first time
he is excited
So am I
for sweet tea
in frosted glass
With some lemon
Enough sweet tea.
No such thing
Gitters from caffeine
need more water
for my coffee
way to strong
been working out
to attract ladies
With my looks

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
It won't work
Strut your stuff
Fan it out
she want look
it won't hurt
not for long
Be over soon
I hope so
Not to late
To start over
From the beginning
A new adventure
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Slam your door
hear shock gobble
Others hear to
Block the road
Here he comes
From outa state
over the line
He's a youtuber
making a name
Owl hooten fool!
At sun up
Calls too much!!!
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Look a drone
With a camera
Tracking my movements
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Deeper into woods
without my permission
That's too bad
im not lost
Just walking around
doing some scouting
For next season
Never too early
get guns ready
clean before opening
Practice with calls
Or scalded cat
Get tuned up
Get good mileage
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
better than walking
Ride a horse

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Be a cowboy
Get bow legged
Passel some cattle
On the range
Where buffalo roam
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Deer and antelope
And rattlers play
game called life
Then it ends
It's dinner time!!
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
then let's eat
Don't cook tonight
Ordering pepperoni pizza
And some beer
I got indigestion
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Tums may work
no toilet paper
Better stay home
And prepare well
like mom said........
take a bath
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Clean it off
You'll feel better
I hope so
Give it time
I used leaves ????
Still a mess
Smells bad too.
It was runny
That's just nasty
Change baby's diapers
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Smells real bad.
get air freshener
washed and clean
Ready to go
For another day
of hot temperatures
Shoot some arrows
Broad heads only
not flying true
go slick trick
What's that mean?
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
It means this
I don't know
type of broadhead
Fred Bear made........
Them alot better
Ramcats will prevail
They probably will
When pigs fly
It will happen
Just have faith
Will bear fruit
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Then we'll eat!!
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
May haw jelly
On buttered biscuits
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with hot coffee
And some bacon
Till we're stuffed
Then we nap
Snoring all day
Playing all night
chasing the ladies
Woke up with
A supernatural thang
from another world
she was ugly
but she cooks
and turkey hunts
And cleans house
and means well...
Still ugly though
Pretty on inside
who can tell
Use The Force
To do good
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On to others
Especially the supernatural
need loving to
leave light off
So I can't
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Hurt my eyes
need pair sunglasses
Real dark ones
To scope out
What's going on
Behind closed doors
You'll go blind
If you look
I reckon so
Just don't peek
For too long
You might get
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a back hander
To the mouth
MAN that hurt
Got loose teeth
And busted lip
Dude could hit
But I busted
My new sunglasses
lost them overboard
Dive get em
Gold plated stems
waters to deep
Use a magnet
It might work
Use strong string
Boat just sunk
In trouble now
I can't swim
I need help
I often float
Like a rock
Bob Seger song
Who is that
just another singer
But can he
Stand arrow straight ?
what color vanes
Bought a .410
good for you
Are porcupines really
Good to eat ?
Fried or cooked?
Kinda the same
As tough pork
Porky pig is
My ex wife!!!!



Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Now that's bad
That the truth?
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He said so.
Must be true
Th-th-th-That's all folks
this must continue
Oh really now?
This LiL piggy......
Is going home
And taking nap
In the bed
After a shower
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Still stanks though
didn't wash good
Behind the ears?
And the feet
between your toes
There's fromunda cheese!!!

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
That is nasty
Full of protein
If I had
Time to think
I would probably
go bream fishing
In deep water
Beetle spins rock
So do jigs
Watch out for
They are strong
I might drown
Don't swim upstream
It's too hard
she didn't care
They never do
Silly lil thing
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What's she thinking
She needs spanked
With a paddle
Good strong one
really built good
And very solid
Like a tank
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Something like that
Should be illegal
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That's for sure
This thread sucks!!!!


Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
in what way .. :begging:
I don't know
China stole election
make america great
Trump really won
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Bidens a pupet
Biden's a weaner
And big joke
He's ruining America
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Quick and fast
Into the dirt
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Totally ruining it
Time for another
impeachhment of him
Boy I wish
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Don't we all?
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Yep it's time
Time for what?
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Squirrel season almost!
Fried squirrel breakfast
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With buttered grits
Buttermilk tasty biscuits
Yum yum yum!!!!!

Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Sounds real good
Before heading out
were you going
Out with them
To have fun
catching lightening bugs
Bring the blanket
To keep warm
build a fire
to roast marshmallows
and drink beers
Make some smores
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yummy so good
And very tasty
can be messy
Finger licking good
those chicken legs
Are just right
Wait One Minute!!!!!
Mashed potatoes, corn
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NOoooo Not That!
Oh why not
I'm talking about......
grandma country cooking
Good fried chicken
and mashed potatoes
Corn with taters?
aahhhh sweet tea
With some lemon
on the rocks
Add Some booze?
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Mr. Jack Daniels
That'll do it
Then pass bottle
Little sip only
No big gulps
Savor the taste
Don't waste it
Nope, we won't
Can't afford to
Go out drinking
looking for cougars
That is scary
Not them cougars
in country bars
In Daisy Dukes?
and cowboy boots!!!!!
drinking cold beer
Shaking that thing
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driving everyone crazy
With that thang
I call Badonkadonk
Yeah that's it
Crazy little thing..
We all love
To have it
When we can
if not fish
Or go hunting
After them coyotes
Calling em in
Within shotgun range
Moment of truth
Here he comes
Line em up
Squeeze the trigger
Longbeard is flopping
tripped over branch......
Coyote grabs turkey
Runs like heck
There he goes
Over the hill
I hear BOOM
And he's dead
load another shell
Pick up empty
To roll again
Into the water
to clean off
All the dirt
From under her
nails and hair
And between toes
Scrub them bits
And the pieces
Till all clean
and shiny new
Oh so fresh
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Smells so good
Without the perfume
And the deorderant
Going all Natural?
covering your smell
to blend in
With the woods
Like an Indian
Stealthy with moccasins
on the hunt
For big game
Classing the landscape
Searching for anything
That'll taste good
Wow, what's that
Roasted buffalo hump
That sounds tasty
Yup sure is
Where's my piece?
Still on fire
Put it out
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
No need heat
Its getting chilly
Late at night
On the prairie
With full moon
Under shiny stars
and clear skies
It's just great
To be free
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
Of all worries
of government oppression
And government bullshit
rolling down hill
At high speed
hit the brakes
Then spun out
Sent from deep in the woods where the critters roam.
and hit something
What the heck
Just happened here
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I don't know
Does anyone know
This thing going
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All the way
To the train
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Or the bus
Is too late
Ignored to long
Better fix it
Real soon man
Before to late
Or else it
Will not work
In the morning
Wood is good
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for smoking meat,,,,,
Or keeping warm
Or building boxes
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For the frieght
To ship them
To the happy
buyer of items
For his store
So he can
Deck it out
for the holidays
Tis the season
To be Jolly
Deck the halls
With the boughs
I am stumped
Really how come
I don't know
Neither do I
What's going on?
Who really knows
who really cares
I don't care
Neither do I
Biden sure doesn't!!!
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Guy is lost
Yelp really lost
can't remember either
He never won
the super bowl,
Received participation trophy
What a crock
Yep it is
Time to go
Make the donuts
brew the coffee
Get the cups
Chug it all
Don't leave home.
With out it
In Stanley Thermos
To keep it
Nice and toasty
on cold mornings
It taste good
please get more
So we can
sit deer stand
Waiting for buck
To come by
Watching squirrels jump
In the trees
wind is blowing
Pretty darn hard
cold wind chill
making deer move
During the day
I sleep alot
Have not hunted
for grizzly bear
Or polar bear
but want to
Get one someday
Before I die
With a bow
Like the Indians
used to do
To survive winter
drink warm milk
If you can
With Oreo cookies
double stuffed Oreo
Wow sounds great
Making me hungry
then let's eat
Turkey and stuffing
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gravy and biscuits
With sweet tea
Yams and taters
don't forget desserts
Cold pumpkin pie
Perfect Pecan Pie
time for nap
no going hunting
Truck won't start
This damn vehicle
needs new battery
and starter fluid
To get going
on my way
To the birds
before sun up
left my gun
In my blind
thirty miles away
Darn the luck
forgot my shells
I've forgot gun
Hunt is over
bought new gun
Can't find ammo
ask a friend
to go fishing
Need some bait
Use stink bait
for river catfish
And channel cat
For fish fry
Need tartar sauce
need fishing cooker
With cooking oil
fried my eggs
Added some sausage
Biscuits in oven
making sausage gravy
Open the wine
Need a corkscrew
To open bottle
To let breath
In nice decanter
who drank it
Probably was Tom
The Sly Longbeard
Coming in silently
Pretty head up
Strutting on in
proud and silently
Was not aware
only 10' away
Almost peed myself
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nobody saw it........
Like a ghost
he faded away
Into morning fog
it's finally lifting
It was thick!
almost like rain
clothes got damp
Sun's coming out
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Turkeys in field
Gun is raised
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His head's raised
Drew a bead
He started running
over the hill
Disappeared outta sight
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Just like Houdini
Poof he's gone
show me evidence
No evidence here
J Shaped droppings
cover it up
Leave no sign
To be seen
By other hunters
who come along
And get your
Gun on knee
a little closer
Any minute now
he's gobbling good
Moving very slowly
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draw a bead
BOOM Dead done
that was exciting
Lots of fun
Carried him home
He is heavy
But was smiling
Long walk back
to the truck
Over rough terrain
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watch out rattlesnake
Laying in leaves
Ready to strike
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Give him room
Hear him rattle
he's big one
BOOM dead done
Nice new belt
or hat band
Fly tying feathers
Are now available
In the store.
Just sold out
Will not reorder
going back home
Look on internet
To get some
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Before they're gone
Make your own
don't have time
for all that
rather be hunting
Some horny gobblers
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Gobbling every breathe
In the woods
Down the road
on neighbors land
Watching the Bills!!!
Wow they won
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Come on now
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They looked great
Good for them
Not for me
Can't blame you
But I can!!!!

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But I won't
Yes you will
Some time soon
It will end
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Fat lady singing
Let's go home
We're all done
No more gobbling
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Let's find another
Call to buy
On the internet
Too high priced
going to look
For some decent
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Calls to buy
who you recommend
call a pro
for his recommendations
On a slate
or a glass
Of straight whiskey
Would be good
Smooth as silk
after long day
Pendleton is recommended
Or maybe Mabry
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Jack will do
That's for sure
Whistle Pig works
Just don't drive
Your wife crazy
It will cost
You big time
Just not good
for home team
Hopefully continues tonight
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or very soon
Maybe next year
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Or year after
She might forgive
Your total betrayal
Get over it
Or forget it
and move on
To better things
new bass boat
New box call
Brand new Dodge
That'd be nice
It gets better
Wait and see
Maybe new wife
No more wife's
Think I'll pass
Yep me too
Stay free to
Share a beer
and some nachos
And some cheese
That's nacho cheese !
Yum, eat'em up!
Wings on way
Time to eat
Pizza as well?
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Sure, ordered pizza
Mozzarella sticks please!
Sounds really good
Cold beer please
In frosted mug
With some nuts
And popcorn too
Butter and salt
Cause heart attacks!!!

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And that's bad
For all folks
That's for sure
don't you know
You must exercise
and eat right
To lose weight
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To be safe
Safe isn't living!
drinking beer is,,,,,,,,,
Just for today ;)
And again tonight
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a bourbon whiskey
But I'm allergic!
Sometimes life sucks
a big lemon
But if life.........
Stops, not good
Is if Saved
My strength for
My next hunt
Because I'm going
After grizzly bear
Going with bow
And sharp stick
a big rock
fell on me
Ow my leg
Limp evenly now
Around mountain side
Away from him
So he doesn't
See me move
Like the wind
I am invisible
in stealth mode
Sneaking around woods
Being real quite
Until that twig
Snapped like thunder
So now what
Do you do
Stand real still
Do not flinch
Fuck Joe Bidumb!!!!



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He's a moron
And a puppet

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and a thief
No argument here
tell the truth,,,,,,,,,,,
About uncle joe
Lets go Brandon
Pisses libtards off!!!

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So does Trump
Let's go TRUMP
The real president
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Gas was cheaper
So was food
Every thing was
Kong fu fighting
in your face
With lemon pie
I'd shove a
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Lemon pie up
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Joe Bidumb's butt!!!
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Covered with cayenne
Fire that up
Not hot enough.
Stoke it up
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Get it hot
I'm getting hungry
Brandon is hungry!
Better feed it
To the crocs
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To get rid
Of it all
For good,right
That'd be nive
Correction
That'd be NICE
Make America great
Again and Again
Take that Liberals
And go to
You know where
Nice and hot
Just like Louisiana
Hotter than that
Burn baby burn
up in smoke
Cheech & Chong
They've sobered up
Pretty old now
Chong has not
He's still tripping
Over it all
Just can't walk
Down the road
In the dark.
Without a moon
To follow the
Fence row line
To the cabin
Up on mountain
By the stream
near the meadow
Where Elk graze
And turkeys gobble
And hens cluck
And owls hoot
And leprechauns hide
But before the
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Time runs out
We must go
To our tree
And swat skeeters.
With your hat
need a Thermacell
And face mask
Keep those bugs
Away from me
Need some deet?
Lots of it
Enough to taste?
Not that much
Not near face
It could hurt
Get's in eyes.
Really stings bad
There's a gobbler
putting like crazy
At my calling
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Coming my way
No, running away!
He seen me
Better shoot now
Oh by golly
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Big Tom down
See him flop
Dirt nap again
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Another great gobbler
14 inch beard
Strutting his stuff
With nubby spurs :/
But smokey color
Pretty neat looking
Might stuff him
First trophy bird
I ever got
With nubby spurs :TooFunny:
But that beard
Is really nice
Longer than mine
Not even close!
Way too skinny
Let it grow
For another year
But there tasty
Here and now
Not any later
I'm still here!
Thought you left
come on back
Lemonades cold
I prefer sweettea
Over soda pop
All the time
During the summer
When it's hot
I need water
That's too plain
shot of bourbon
Bourbon....Scotch.....Beer
It's all good
Until its misused
It's all swill
That tastes good
and not healthy
Beer makes me
Use the bathroom
Way too much
Time wasted away
Money as well
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Damaging your health
And screwing up
Your home life
Takes a dive
Into the Shitter
Time to change
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Change is good
To bud light
So very vile
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And it's rotton
Leaves nasty taste
Smells rancid too
and looks bad
From a distance
But up close?
That's another story
It's even worse!
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Then it appears
The Uber tab!
Way too high
Drove like maniac!
Got myself arrested
Trip to station
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Tossed in slammer
Bail out now
Its not over
court hear next
Get an attorney
Saul Good Man?
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Not Good Enough
For my problems
But maybe yours
Should've drank coffee
Or gone to
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Take a shot
At a skunk
It might spray
My lord no
Praying is good
For the soul
Mac and Cheese
cheese and crackers
Wine and Cheese
Fruits and nuts
Yogurt
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Bad breakfast food
bad for you
Didn't taste good
It was bad
So bad that
Dog wouldn't eat
Nor the cat
But he ate
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and got sick
cleaned up mess
drove to vet
Wallet now empty
Yep I'm broke
Can't buy gas
Eat some beans
From the can
Broken can opener
Used my knife
To get er
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Done with that
Really dull knife
Rubbed on rock
Spat on it
Shined er up
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Still can't cut
A darn thing
so I got
a new one
Which is nice
If it works
Which I hope
let me see
If it's the
answer to my
dull knife problem
Maybe, maybe not
i don't care
Well, you wouldn't
butttt you do
Sorta, kinda...maybe
who really cares
Well honestly, nobody
Would do that
Yes they would
All day long
To get ahead
Of the game
You have to
Skirt the rules
to get ahead
move around him
to get promoted
work really hard
Pay your dues
Out of hell
If you can
Do it right
The first time
And you won't
Need to do
It over again
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Unless you make
Lots of money
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and know how
To build it
Properly the first
measure before cutting
It twice and
build back better
a new structure
For the farm
animals to live
A respectable life
It's milking time
Get the iodine
get the feed
Clean those udders
get the stool
Get to milking
Those big producers
of raw milk
Sure can eat
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keeps them healthy
So they will
Keep on producing
Lactose filled juice :D
Goat's milk is
A good substitute
But not as
Widely consumer accepted
But attitudes change
When things go
Pretty darn bad
then you need
figure it out
and hope that
Things get better
but they seldom
Do without work
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and some compromise
On your part
All good things
must have compromise
If not you'll
make other plans
That aren't desirable
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and may cause
some second thoughts
and lingering pain
take your medicine
Prescribed by a
Very good doctor
for medical treatment
To get rid
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all types of
Lonesome hen blues
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Or a bad
sounding pot call
or any call
For that matter
waste of money
so I tossed
in the garbage
and went looking
for something new
maybe even better
that sounds good
In the woods
While I am
Trailing a Tom
lost my striker
and some shells
only two left
Better not miss
Oh you won't
Greg might miss
Not a chance
He's getting older
Sadly but surely
things start to
Sag and creek
and your aim
boom he's dead
I'm not sure
need a photo
Or didn't happen
Maybe you missed
your just jealous
Of my sexiness.
in your dreams
May be right
could be wrong
Steve is wrong
all the time
but he could
Harvest a Tom
maybe next year
if he's lucky
let's hope so
Ya never know
who really cares
Really, I care
Don't know why
because I'm nice
Tom Turkey cares
about most things
In turkey hunting
And a little
About this and
that go a
long way people
if you believe
In the laws
and abide by
Them you'll be
a good citizen
and prosper greatly
but only if
you work hard
every single day
to reach your
Final final goal
which could change
the final outlook
and your attitude
If your not
careful and maintain
a steady course
things could change
For the worse
Depending on your
View of things
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he's always negative
but brings out
A good point
will stick you
In the butt!!!!

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Look before sitting
it was sharp
but you'll recover
some good antibiotics
don't do drugs
That explains everything!
about the question
and the person
who turkey hunt
I hear he's
A great shot
with a slingshot
if he's lucky
He hits air
Born blow flys
typically live about
Two or three
Weeks then it's
way too late
for them to
Get them out
of your hair
off your mind
and out of
Your body cavity
Before they cause
Significantly gross damage
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health comes first
Above all else
watch your step
And be careful
because you never
when it is
Too late to
call a friend
For any help
call on God
He might respond
if your lucky
He always does
all the time
You just have
To ask for
guidance and direction
And except answer
Or look deep
Into your soul
and reflect on
the right way
to move forward
He answers Prayers
if you listen
in His time
He has always
been there for
Anybody that ask
forgiveness and prayers
and seek answers
From surprising places
where one might
Not even know
what is truely
the correct answer
Nor how to
Change the subject
to something completely
different, like turkeys?
Turkey hunting is
way of life
For hard core
Turkey hunters in
most states who
Like to call
And hunt hard
but, due to
the work schedule
I arranged other
Ways to get
to chase Turkeys
But not as
Franks and beans. :funnyturkey:
eat them from
I got nothin
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From all that
neither did I
Let's start again
Turkey hunting is
Tie that binds
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Many of us
Addicting as anything
We've ever done
due to our
Passion for wildlife
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and pursuit of
The Wild Turkey!
We always give
ourselves 100% to
Try an capitalize
on a Longbeard
If not, there
Will always be
Worthless crooked politicians
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Selling our heritage
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for personal gains
Just because they
can without any
Interference from the
systems established to
Prevent just this
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type of chaos
Let's ban together
for a common
Cause and stop
the raping of
our beloved Nation
All it takes
is new leadership
For the next
few years until
I vote again
That is if
there's no cheating
because we all
Want America back
to the way
I got photograph
stand for freedom
If not, then
teach your children
To respect our
Lord, National Heritage
and way of
In today's world
so we pray
Things will change
for the better
In years to
He is hot
He's gobbling hard
Here he comes
Getting all excited
Drop the hammer
Feathers are flying
Missed, hit fan
Maybe next time
I'll shoot straight...
if I get
barrel unbent somehow
and new scope
And special choke
plus eye exam
Remember to load
Done that before
We all have......
Left gun home
but remembered lunch
and enjoyed my
Chicken & biscuits
And heck with
Hunting that day
Belly to full
to even move
Will have to
Unbutton my pants
and relieve myself
Hoping nobody sees
No one around
Let's hope not
You ain't kidding...
Could cause problems
If they did
somebody called police
In big trouble
what a mess
Need bail money
hard to explain
Why I need
so much money
for new truck
to take hunting
riding in style
and looking good
Riding the truck
In the woods
scratching it up
And getting it
Full of blood
legal or illegal
Depending on situation
Guilty as charged
And no big
time to serve
will make it
easier for me
to learn better
and be smarter
Young will learn
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from the old
If their smart
Will not learn
Nor care to
No social skills
Or respect for
Those that came
before them and
Respect your elders
At All times
They paved way
With their lives
and their work
blood and sweat
and tears for
all of us
to get ahead
to make USA
the greatest country
In the world
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even tho some
want to tear
Her apart for
Their own personal
agenda of course
America lives on
It's military might
Ain't what it
once was but
But was like
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No other in
the world today
And should stay
ready to deploy
We stand tall
Ready to defend
At all times
Our way of
Life and freedom
Is being threatened
On many fronts
we will resist
AT all cost
Those who want
freedom from tyrant
And oppressive authority
God bless America
and all that
That may entail
But some sacrifices
Will have to
be made to
get it done
In the future
Before it all
leads to chaos
and massive destruction
All across the
Country and beyond
Hope Christ comes
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better get ready
For the final
test of time
0r be left
standing by yourself
Wondering what happened
to me again
please help us
find the answer
Because we're baffled
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and very confused
but open to
And and all
To bring change
To our souls
let us gather
At the river
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And all go
camping and fishing
Near a crick
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To relax, enjoy
nature and friends
All God's creation.
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share life together
United we stand
Divided we fall
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but stronger together
As we set
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watching gobblers gobble
thinking about Spring
And all the
getting things ready
Recleaning our guns
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replacing old equipment
with something new
or maybe better
Reuse trusty items
Trusty is comfortable
When you're living
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the good life
with no worries
what will happen
Day to day
And night to
Beautiful morning sunrise
nice and cool
Great hunting day
hens in the
area showing promising
to anxious Gobblers
and hunters alike
glad to see
things are better
this is true
but how long
will it last
Before it all
starts to unravel
Let's stand together
for mutual support
Overcome our challenges
Always stand tall
Overcoming all challenges
And putting down
The ones that
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Jeopardize our freedoms
for free world
our free thought
In order to
Keep our country
free of socialism
And any other
threats to our
nation and rights
Don't do it
vote and fight
for your rights
while we can
To get this
Country back together
And strong again
lets get going
And vote for
the red wave
Is going to
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piss some off
but who cares
We gotta do
What's right to
Protect our rights
And make America
great country again
For all of
us, not just
a select few
let's get started
Making new friends
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With same agenda
to make plans
to better our
Life here in
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America, for Americans
Star Spangled Banner
freedom and pride
For all Americans
to embrace our
way of life
and our freedoms
victory at last ---- House
Now let's see
if anything changes
I totally agree
it will because
It's very disgusting
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what has happened
in this country
Let's move on
To new topic
yes for sure
something of interest
looking for deals
to save money
let's go shopping
till you drop
Your last dollar
on something you
you really want
But really need
Searching camera gear
for awesome pictures
to share with
Our forum family
outdoors and nature
Gotta love them!
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And take care
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preserving what we
so dearly love
And really enjoy
Our time outdoors
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making great memories
over the years
let's get started
Making some more
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plans to go
Turkey hunting with
Calls from here
boxes, pots, trumpets
and my old
Scratch boxes as
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They are fun
And work well
getting a response
from weary gobblers
Down in hollow
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Searching for love
Leading to doom
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Been there myself
watching him gobble
with anticipation and
Roosted ain't roasted....
Roasted good but
Fried is better
With mashed potatoes
And Collard Greens
and black-eyed peas
With Tabasco Sauce
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way too hot
try Frank's Redhot...
New owners ruined
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which often happens
Living in the
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Deep dark woods
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all kinds of
things can happen
with your gun
or other equipment
what a morning
a great memory
Maybe laugh about
how it happened
and replace damaged
equipment and gear
sure is expensive
but learned a
Valuable life lesson
while turkey hunting
On my own
in your blind
Wish it weren't
hunt what works
Making 3 calls
did he gobble
We will see
listen don't talk
but I enjoy
calling too much
but at times
Not enough chatter
that was exciting
an adrenaline rush
Tote him home
carry him home
Fry him up
With some Morells
Onions and garlic
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gravy and biscuits
time to eat
With hot coffee
NO sweet tea
Yes sweet tea!
Love sweet tea
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With a lemon
Nope, not anymore
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some add brandy
Wild Turkey Bourbon
good with anything
WHAT a feast
Enjoyed with family
watching Christmas Vacation
A Christmas Story!
without the SNOW
We have snow
snow ice cream
With hot fudge
what a treat
Cherry on top!
Is that Santa?
Looks like him
I'm not sure
Wearing red suit
Must be Satan
Time will tell
Rudolph is coming
guiding his sled
To the bar
To get hammered
Pretty girls dancin
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shake it baby
don't break it
Feelin the fever
Oh my goodness
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let's get started
Can't wife calling
Could be trouble
Or Big time
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Clothes on lawn
wife is mad
sleeping with dog
Breath is bad
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Smells like Liverwurst
Might have fleas
Loaded with ticks
Only one ear
get the spray
apply it liberally
hopefully that works
Man's best friend
Always there everytime
Devotion never waivers
wanting to play
and get fed
Or just rubbed
take him hunting
It'll be fun
a great memory
shared with family
Something to cherish
In the moment
all the excitement
Got me going
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Watching her excitement
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Flushing a bobwhite
Pulling up gun
Forgot to load
before i left
gun went click
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Blood pressure rose!
Had to laugh
He flew away
what a morning
One to remember
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On to the
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On the list
Tomorrow mornings roost
Waiting and listening
Fly down cackle
Getting a little
Light out now
Waiting in anticipation
For first gobble.....
Waiting, listening....nothing
time to move
you need patience
Something some miss
Patience kills turkeys
More than anything
Turkeys need stuffing!
Among other things
like cranberry sauce
Warm pumpkin pie
Cup of coffee
cream and sugar
warms my soul
Hearing first gobble
making a move
slowly, listening, watching
Turkey's move next
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he goes quiet
Into the night
beat once again
Never give up
Always next time
Keep hope alive
He will return
hopefully he will
Matter of time
next morning hunt
Hopefully he shows
Up today looking.
So is he
For juicy Lucy :funnyturkey:
Going to have
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Load of TSS
gun missed fired
or did it?
What really happened?
He spooked bird
Must have moved
A bit close
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Saw him blink
maybe a twitch
Heard him breathe
Something went wrong
Don't know what
Turkeys being turkeys
That's what they
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do, somewhat unpredictable.
Observe, learn, apply
Pull the trigger
make something happen
without getting upset
and learn from
That past mistake
can help educate
Alot of people
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About Turkey hunting
If they'll listen
And hunt ethically
but, we know
rookies get excited
Some misjudge yardage
I sure have
We all have
Missed a bird
too many to
want to admit
I shot high
Over the snooded
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into the wind
he went laughing
Hunter started crying
Repeated many times
It's this shotgun
not shooting straight
Need a scope
your kidding me
Or red dot
Not my fault
Never the shooter
I blame you
A bit perhaps
Well, thank you
Thanks a million
For the memories
Want one more
Crack at him?
to fulfill my
Turkey hunting dream
Merriam's or Gould's
what a trip
that would be
packing my satchel
don't forget extra
Ammo and clothes
and most importantly,
Load your gun
Take your glasses
shotgun with scope
Don't forget the
Calls, TP, Meds
Now I'm ready
time to go
Forgot truck keys
Your always forgetting
Your seat cushion
my butt hurts
can't get comfortable
Sat on thorns
that really hurts
and somewhat embarrassing
Not good day
NOW fire ants
Biting my butt
Gonna need salve
and a buddy
NOT A DUDE
friend for life
Like a brother
Carried bird out
on his back
admired his beauty
Stole the meat
Leaving me with
peckers and feathers
And TSS pellets
Some fond memories
chasing this gobbler
Let's find another
In the pines
If we can
move very slow
Here he comes
Getting gun up
I spooked him
Here goes nothing
And got nothing
No Turkey soup
No feathered friends
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just left wondering
what will happen
if my buddies
Forgot to bring
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Their own shells
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Long walk home
Quiet ride home
Out of gas
find a can
and siphon hose
Fill the can
Long walk back
from the back
Let's just hunt
lets eat first
You're always hungry!!
Eat some jerkey
or deer sticks
Drink some wine
Maybe a beer
No thank you
Not while hunting
Are you scared.
of the dark
Better not be
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Because things happen
In big woods
You Can't Control.
Nor really explain
How it happened.
Why it happened
Sasquatch was Pizzzzed!
who saw sasquatch
taking a leak
In the mountain
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Oops wind blowin
Peed on toes
And my pants
it was cold!!!!
Made it short
Super cold hunt
Try again tomorrow
May be warm
but may rain
Squatches wear pants?
when it's cold
Keep from freezing
then things start
because of antifreeze
It's not cold
but its snowing
So very pretty
Watch your step
You could slip.
and fall down
Bust your butt
of your stock.
On a rock
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well that just
Won't be good
Long walk back
to my truck
Long ride home
Stopped for beer
Washed sorrows away
Got pulled over
Got a DUI
Lost my license
Gotta walk now
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maybe the bus
Called my ex
She hung up
Called her sister
Better cook anyhow.
Hotter any ways
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Cold food's horrible
now not hungry
Asked for dessert
Got some pie
Sweet cherry Pie
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Cup of coffee
Or a Cappuccino
Tea for Me
Cream and Sugar
prefer it black
Or on ice
OHhhhh her Sister!
Don't do it
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He went there
She's still laughing
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But she refused.
Fix my zipper.
No way Jose
People would talk
Your sister wouldn't
Looks like trouble
On the horizon
just at sunrise
There she was
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Chasing that tom
He nailed her
Hunt is over
Until next time
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when the chase
Begins once again
With a text
Come on over
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For a beer
Which ends with
Someone hitting tree
with their vehicle
ambulance ride now
wife ticked off
Looks like divorce
Now sleeping in
Her sister's room
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Don't look now.
mom's watching now
Back from vacation
Lost my license
Need a ride
To wife's sisters
for round two
Just the tip
of the iceberg
Forgot my shells
second trip home
Better look again
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Just found it.
Heading out again
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something isn't right
what's that sound
What she said
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Stay on track
Baby got back
Started to pack
for the hunt
of a lifetime
In the mountains
for a week.
off the grid
Under the radar
on my own
fending for myself
With no help.
Mountain hunting Merriam's
making them gobble
but striking out
Need some food
water and rest
Internet a must
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Bottle of Scotch
With some ice
And some Sambuca
What the heck!!!
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who is that
Someone is trespassing
That ain't happening
Off to jail
Paying some fines
Hide the body!
and any evidence
I hate digging!
Rented a backhoe.
Leaves paper trail
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yes, good thinking
On second thought
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Pay in cash
Drive different vehicle
Use fake ID
change your tires
Don't forget Lime
The High Life
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on the ledge
reality sinking in
To the bottom
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Beneath the seaweed
On the bottom.
It's buried treasure
What she said
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Was your friend
key word....was
The treasures disappeared!
Someone was watching
Someone betrayed you
I feel sick
Was saving that
for what reason
Possibilities are endless
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Some good, some.....
just can't wait.
You got to
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Hear him Walking
Now no lens
one eye blind
Chopped off Ear
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Need medical services
in a hurry.
before I start
Can't wear glasses!
Have no nose
it fell off
in the dirt
now breathing dust
coughing a lot
Throat is infected
time for antibiotics
and some probiotics
Then toilet time
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Outhouse don't smell
no toilet paper
use a corncob
don`t forget lime
kill the odor
Need a clothespin
Take deep breath
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Leave door open
snake slithered in
Unload the gun
shot my foot
You big dummy
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Missing two toes
And walking crooked
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Stumbled around anyway
Watch your step
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Still going hunting
Well of course!
all terrain crutches
Paint them camo
Not going far
Up on ridge
Overlooking it all
Trolling for gobblers
Gobblers trolling for
My sexy calling
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I taste vomit
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Putrid isn't it
Spit it OUT
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Spitting and drumming
about to gobble
I hear him
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The adrenaline flowing
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missed the shot
##÷×=& da#$$$ m#%$%^%!!!!
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my fault entirely
Picked up head
took a breath
You know better
Just a mistake
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I am human
Are we sure?
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What to do
that's a conundrum
Like a mess
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Clean it up
then start over
WHY do that
Because I can
and makes sense
How it happened.
Nobody will know
Everybody will know!
don`t repeat this
I'm no snitch!
Just don't tell.
Did ya hear
Ain't heard nothing
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Ain't said nothing
Seen nothin' either
Don't wanta know
Could be damaging
To my reputation
But who cares
True, I don't
Sure you do
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No, not really
This is funny
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Yes, It is
What is it
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its a riddle
So is life
So is my
Wife's Crazy Sister
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I met her!
I am sorry
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It's all good
could be worse
Could be better
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I had both
But lost them
Along the road
Yellow brick road
leading to success
With the turkey
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That got shot
In the face
Just one time
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Dropped like a
Ton of bricks
Didn't even twitch
He was dead
But then he
Ran, Beep Beep!
dang road runner
Fast little bugger
Don't look back
Shoot him again
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Ran through hole
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Out of hell
The anvil fell!
On his head
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taking dirt nap
In the mud
Down and dirty
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Another tag filled
Onto the next
adventure down in
south west mississippi
Heaven on Earth
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Home of the
Big mean BulldaWgs!
Bulldogs are little
Maroon bulldogs bite
or maybe nibble
Prefer a mutt
Just as smart
Just as loving
Drooling like Harpua
on the floor
making a mess
whats that smell
smells like $*#+
That is ugly
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clean it up
Odor is bad.
Buy air fresheners
Hopefully, they'll work
Nope still stinks
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Sell the place
Quit eating Broccoli
Her sisters calling
Not her again
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Change your number
I like her
She is Pretty.
hunts and fishes
And a boat
Need boat photos
But she probably
Has a set
A matching set
A spectacular set!
Break them out
What, of Oars
No, Flotation Devices!!
Jeans will work!
Flotation is important!
$450 vests float?
Mileage may vary
Hold my beer
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I'm going in
You can't swim
wait an hour
You just ate
I gotta go
Find a tree
Swallowed the lake
wearing my vest
SCRATCH' that vest!
On sale $450
I'll trade a
Bag of weed
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and feed. With
a new sprayer
Might be skunk
Smells like it
Naw, it's me
need a shower
Soap and Water
Take it off
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Let me leave
I'm outta here
It's getting deep
True Real deep
Don't get stuck
In that rut
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Won't be pretty
Ohhhh No! My
Ache breaky heart
I'm not hurt
My boot's stuck!
in the mud
Only one left!
Pick it up
Wash it off
Now it's clean
Need new socks
Rinse in stream
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Feet gonna smell
A wet dog
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That's pretty bad
Skunk sprayed him
Get tomato juice
Or hydrogen peroxide
Sleeping with dogs
Three Dog Night
Struck out again
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Going home alone
Dog loves me
He protects me
Doesn't know better
But he will
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Pee on rims
Or your leg
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On turkey camo
now I'm MAD
don`t be sad
He knows better
Pee on him
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Grab a umbrella
And some rubbers
You got plans
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I do, but
She said okay
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I'll pay later
Does it burn
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When you pee?
Sorry I couldn't help it :TooFunny:
Yep that's right
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Go see Dr
Ain't looking good
It never did
Oh jeepers creepers
Need new peepers
drink more water
Need to hydrate
She's not calling
But she will
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Not this time
Just be patient
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She found another
She gone again
better off alone
Much happier now
Time to party
Have some fun
play a game
With your self
It is impossible
Oh it's possible
Video game fun.
Hooked on gaming
It's an addiction
It can be
What you want
Like anything else
I want it
Go get it
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have at it
When you want
But hurry up
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Offer only lasts
A few days
Get it now
While supplies last
Mr Fox vest
Vastly overpriced product
but people collect
Happy for them
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Great for me.
I'll take 2
at that price
Could get car
Not very far
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Details, details, details.
money in them
Old dirty g-strings
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I lost one
Shame on you
Bless his heart
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Means many things!
But who cares
Reward If found
you won't find
without some effort
things turn up
They always do
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I miss them
Friends that died
Will see again
One day soon
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Depending on you
I am determined
Reflect and adjust
adapt and overcome
Live and learn
Old too fast
Smart too slow
In the South
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Gets to warm
Heaven, on Earth
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Maybe if snowing :D
Crawfish and beer
I would ski
Too old now
Hold my beer
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Got to pee
lets go hunting
Best idea today
making more memories
In the woods
Family and friends
Need to leave
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Going to miss
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Those that've gone.
Hunting without me
Making new friends
On Old Gobbler
And while hunting
As we should
Always give thanks
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and be respectful
Those that've gone
Those we meet
as we go
We may not
Down gravel road
The lonely woods
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along our path
Free our minds
But Gaurd souls
Keeping friends close
Keep enemies closer
Not too close
but just enough
To watch over
And protect those
Who protect us
THIN BLUE LINE
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But what side
Always the south
Every side matters
Side of righteousness
Please seek him
if your smart
You will ask
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Christ into heart
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Best decision ever
Alive at last
Change is coming
For the better
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Or the worst
If not meant
Ask and receive
And you shall
Inherit the earth
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He is pleased
But always watching
Gave us turkey
And deer jerky
Ice cold beer
At camp fire
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Good old stories
Good old friends
Who brought the
Beer and burgers
The Cellphone rings
It's my mistress
The sister's calling!
What to do?
Cluck and purr
Bobbing and weaving
Fighting Mohamed Ali
Down goes Frazier
She won't stop
Rooting for Ali
Rope a dope
Pound his head
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Blood was flowing
Don,t touch it
It might be
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Full of germs
And who knows
Where that's going
Or it's been
so protect yourself
and check yourself
Well for ticks
In the supermarket?
Ya never know!
They claim freshness
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Mine was stale
Green and fuzzy?
Way to old
Toss them out
in the garbage
makes it smell
Like spring morning
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In what country?
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are you from
way over yonder
Beyond the hill
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In the valley
Does it matter?
if, i'm late
Just show up
Better bring breakfast
Low carb please.
Wheat turkey biscuit
That's absolutely disgusting
rather have sausage
Than fox vest
Seem priced high
I want 3
one per customer
Who needs two
Who you know
That has em
I might know
Nothing against them
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Good for them
Are they happy.
Go fund me
Rather do without
Just not interested
Nor have funds
Rent to own
rather buy outright
Can't find one
Will be collectable
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Price going up
Above my expectations
Just non't buy
Gotta pass too
Just moving on
to something else
find something better
So she said.
Watch your back
very good advice!
She keeps calling
yelp putt putt
taking him away
circle back around
Hunt him tomorrow
If he shows
He will show
Just be persistent
I'm sleeping in
Don't over sleep
Or under sleep
You'll miss him
At fly down
be broken hearted
Or just mad.
At yourself and
just start scouting
You'll find something
In the woods
for opening day
Good things happen
In the night
At closing time
all are pretty
Bad, real bad
when waking up
Yes and later
In your life
Throttle wide open
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Crash and burn
That is costly
Don't I know
What to buy
need some antibiotics
Have a Itch
That needs scratchin
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Must go hunting
Cure to everything
When they gobble
My heart pounds
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I get excited
and start shaking
Hard to aim
Steady and true
Look a leprechaun!
He runs funny
With pointy shoes
And little legs
And little ——
Just very small
Hands and Feet
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How does he
See the Turkeys
Sneaks up and
Shorter then FaGaWeee.
Where are we
Out of hell
That is good
In tall grass
The Devils Lettuce
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Wash the lettuce
before you eat
Might have fertilizer
Ruins lives and
Upsets your stomach
Rots your teeth
Among other things
Think I'll pass
Until the next
Entree comes around
I could win
A chicken dinner
Rather have ribs
with my fries
Ribs for me!
If their tender
Spicy BBQ Sauce
And buttered cornbread
If it's sweet
With jalapeños please
They are hot
Hot to trot
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Not for me
Hate sweet sauce
Some is alright
No not really
It all depends
on the heat
And after bite
head to bathroom
This isn't good
That's urban legend
Strike a match
Kill the stench
It may ignite
Just move back
To your hometown
Sit and watch
The festivities begin
Lets get crazy
I already am
Shock treatment today
Industrial strength drugs
Keep you awake
make you crazier
Than you were
which isn't good
For your friends
Nor for yourself
HeeeeaRs Johnny waiting!
Chop that door
Just go out
I'm going home!
Wait I forgot
To tie shoes
For the horse
He's my boah
He's a what
He's a YouuuuuT!
As in youth
He's to young
Just was born
on my birthday
And Uncle Sam's
He accepts taxes?
Which are high
As giraffe nuggets
Never had any
Nutritional mountain oysters
No thank you
Not a chance
Chicken Nuggets Yes!
Ain't no cowboy
Maybe a cowgirl
sure looks nice
and smells good
Sure can cook
and turkey hunts
Owns hunting land
And has boat
Four wheel peel
Alot to ask
Crazy like a
fox, but things
The other way
are not good
Please send certification
I need confirmation
Is she real?
Lord only knows
The Shadow Knows!
He's not saying
Maybe don't know
He's tight billed
Like some turkeys
got shut mouth
Almost Lip Locked
Got bill banded
wattles were red
Caruncles were too
But I missed
That's nothing new!
same old story
Just don't listen
Never sights in
gotta get zeroed
but started shaking
and breathing heavy
Well missed again
Same ol situation
Definition of insanity
Going fishing instead
Hunting season wedding.
I'm not going!
but,mom's going
going hunting instead
They should know
how it goes!
Hunting comes first
Doomed every Anniversary
I see divorce
Gloom and despair
On the horizon
Pain and agony
Truth of life
She loves me
On rare occasion
For my looks
And my awesome
Huge bank account
subject to change
She has 50%
of my money
Government has rest
Selling turkey guns
made a mistake
Very costly one
Is it mine
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You tell me
I pulled out
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of the Garage
Nailed the mailbox
no more deliveries
or Turkey Calls
Must be drunk
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Vaseline on glasses
Oh Okay, Vaseline!
This is strange
I knew better
Won't rub off
Very, very sticky
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Mouse traps also!
Stuck to beard
To my foot
Man the smell
Isn't getting better
Put boots on
Time to hunt
Getting stuff together
In the pack
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Calls, water, snacks
Hope they're gobblin'
and display well
For the shot
But I'll miss
But getting better
Because that TSS
Hits them harder
Than a hammer
on a anvil
It's good stuff
Push pin calls
easy to use
Drives turkeys wild
On Good Friday?
Twice on Sunday
Works every time
Like they say
Everything is possible
If you try
A little tenderness
Three Dog Night
Jeremiah was a
bullfrog....tasted good
Just like chicken?
Just as good
Needs more seasonings
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now it's delicious
finger lickin good
Hm yomi yomi
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Grub worth eating
With hot sauce
and cold beer
what's for dessert
Chocolate Peanutbutter Cake
With ice cream
Keep the peanutbutter
More gluten please
Good for ya
Makes me puke
Sometimes it's good
Each his own
Give me veal
Or deer meat
Even better caribou
Elk is great
Moose is better
I like Moose
caribou over both
Not as good
Steak and lobster
Never had lobster
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You're missing out
meh, its ok
Great with butter
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So is popcorn
And with cheese
cheese adds something
What about framunda?
Quote from: TrackeySauresRex on April 19, 2023, 09:53:55 AM
What about framunda?
That's just gross
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Prefer not to
But it's breezy
I understand but....
Makes glasses fog
I could miss
Sweat in eyes
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Sun in eyes
Mustard on fries
French fried potatoes
Loved that movie
it was good
So was Jaws!
He's so fast
and very dangerous
With big teeth
And big appetite
Swimming along coast
Off the Carolina's
In plain sight
Of the sharks
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And the tourists
Which are worse?
depends on you
Which way now
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the safest direction
Let's get going
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Here he comes
Up the street
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Matchstick in mouth
sleeves off shirt
Here I go
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Getting in trouble
Not doing anything
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He's wearing crocks.
Must be Old_Crow
who really cares
Lost his toughness
Bought some boots
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should't get wet.
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But went home
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maybe another day
Will be perfect
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maybe so, but
Then an eagle
Flew down to
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Catch a fish
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but he missed
So he flew
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Back to perch
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in a tree
Overlooking the water
Looking for Dinner
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or a snack
Belly is Growling.
for some grub
Then a boy
Came along with
A dozen donuts
Glazed in Chocolate
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Bavarian Cream Filled
Glazed for me
Sweet jelly roll
cops showed up
Confiscated the donuts
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The coffee too!
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They had to
They were stolen
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But still good
How to get
Gone within seconds
Powdered sugar everywhere
Follow that trail
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To the station
Off we go
On witch hunt
To find the
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The real truth
Cops ate evidence
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Drug test them
On sugar high
what to do
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Suspend them all
by the ankles
Where's our donuts
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Cough them up!!!
You have them
We want Em!
we ate them
You owe us
???
Lets buy more
Hide this time
case or more
Get a gross
And more coffee
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Use three words :toothy9:
To make story
Flow like butter.
On hot biscuits
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I like jelly
Jam up tight
Was there accident?
Yes, a snacksadent!
One more floppaddent
Could be serious
there's no injuries
Only donut coma
And coffee insomnia
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keeps me awake
And on edge
Ready to Rumble
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Or maybe stumble
You mean stumble?
Stumbling and bumbling
No, just mumbling
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Also some fumbling
While I wonder
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Why doesn't this
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Mumbling to myself
Don't get caught
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People will talk
More than normal
It's their nature
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Some are evil
Others are good
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Anyone know Mumbles?
The crazy clown
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Makeup upside down.
don't like clowns
One tried to
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Catch my brother
Was he falling
Off the wagon
no, another reason
Clowns scear the
Heck out of
Me and brother
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My sister too
do not trust
The evil clown
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with a frown
something isn't right
With that clown
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With red eyes
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And evil smile
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With pointed teeth
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See his hand
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Holding a knife
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Time to decide
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What to do
Fight or flight
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Run like heck
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Fast and far
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Make a plan
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Be the plan
Work the plan
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Before something happens
And you can't
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Bob nor weave
Zig or zag
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Nor pay attention
Scream or Run
From the bear
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In the woods
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tuck and roll
Will crucifix work
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Prayers can't hurt
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Some Holy Water
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a wooden stake
Blessed by clergy
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They went forth
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None came back
A new day
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begins at dawn
With a gobble
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Slipping in quietly
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Easy for turkeys
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Every step cautious
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Looking for Love
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Slowly but surely
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Excited with anticipation
Anxious yet hesitant
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All is clear
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Another step taken
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Time stands still
Eyes staring back
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Watching, evaluating, searching
Looking all around
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Scratching for bugs
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Pecking and picking
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Huffing and puffing
Strutting and gobbling
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Clucking and purring
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Before the shot
Then the flop
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so he's done
End of story
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Until next hunt
After a rainstorm
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The suns out
Gobbler starts talking
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trash talking hunter
a big loudmouth
A hen yelping
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nag, nag, nag
Hen flies down
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Hits the ground
In the distance
The coyote howls
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Cell phone rings
It's probably spam
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Worse time ever
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Walking and scouting
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wondering if I
Scared anything off
or forgot to
Turn ringer off
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lock the truck
Where's my keys
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Back at truck
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Locked up inside
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With my shells
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Calling wife now
Needing spare key
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Hurry "Prime Time"
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She'll get lost
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Now walking home
Step after step
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Hill after hill
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Up and down
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With no water
Dehydration is imminent
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Not ever again
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Been said before
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But keep trying
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don't ever quit
Just keep going
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Never give up
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take up knitting
Sounds very safe
Insurance paid up
Term policy clause
Insurance won't pay
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not until you
Provide witness statement
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Jump through hoops
All red tape
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Making life hard
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Keep moving forward
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Don't look back
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Afternoon hunt begins
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Where are they
On the ridge
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Gobbling like crazy
Slipping in close
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Crawling on belly
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Slowly getting closer
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inching my way
Peeking over ridge
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Being very careful
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eye to eye
With a squirrel
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I feel foolish
No bird around
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But feel hopeful
Keep slipping around
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Stalking very slowly
Looking and listening
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Eyeing every crevice
Investigating every sound
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Ready, on edge
Methane is building
Something not right
on the horizon
What's that sound
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Sorry, Broke wind
Explains the smell
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It's all natural
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Turkeys come running
Setup and ready
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Forgot to load
Agonizing to watch
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Chuckling in disbelief
As it's fumbled
Any chance to
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Load a shell
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Nothing to loose
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Slow and steady
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Wins the race
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Shell is loaded
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My lucky day
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Take the shot
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Gotta come closer
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Some soft purring
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head up, looking
Scratch the leaves
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Anything that helps
One smart bird
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Keep on trying
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Mistakes are made
He is snickering
Actually he's laughing
Strutting his stuff
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Evil turkey plotting
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Your eternal demise.
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Don't give up
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Or give down
Take the shot
Don't miss him
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A steady hand
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Your heart pounding
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Breathing is rapid
Hands are sweaty
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Starting to tremble
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Anticipation is building
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Take a breath
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Toms behind tree
Make final adjustments
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Take safety off
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Sight picture aligned
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Slowly squeeze trigger
Just a snap
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Powder got wet
it can happen
Putt, putt, gone
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back here tomorrow
With new shells
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Heading back home
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Rejected, empty handed
Determined to win
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With new plan
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Early to bed
Early to rise
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You'll over sleep
Hit the snooze
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Too much booze
Too little time
To fully recuperate
Need some coffee
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Hurry to woods
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Try location call
So many choices
Duck Duck Goose
Gobble far off
Moving to him
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With bad intentions
Closing the distance
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slowly with purpose
Careful and quiet
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Looking and listening
got him spottted
Spotted me too!
went another direction
Watching and listening
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With no results
Ok, new plan
Starting over again
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OMG another plan!
Work the plan
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Sounds good but.....
I hear gobbling
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Here we go
On the move
To that spot
Loaded with birds
Find a tree
Get set up
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Waiting, listening, watching
Three soft yelps
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Rake some leaves
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Wait , what's that
it's a skunk
Oh hell No
Ease back out
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No sudden movement
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Easy does it
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With the noise
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Have been there
Quietly as possible
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didn't get sprayed
Good cover scent
Good and strong
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Think I'll pass
A little gas
A little wind
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Nobody will notice
DANG, a shart
Clean that up!
Wait , no paper
Use your underwear
As a mask
Need a change
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That you do!
All better now
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Until next time
Shouldn't be one
I hope not
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Trying yet again
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Out of time
Keep on going
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Getting arrested now
Going to jail
On what charge
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Sharding in public
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Without a permit
Witnessed by turkeys
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They are vindictive
Harassing the wildlife
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With a spotlight
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Imposes heavy fines
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Whip and chain
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Loss of Privlages
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Water boarding next
Tarred and feathered
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Ugly, Real Ugly
The Scavenger's Daughter
Tied and whipped
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The Iron Maiden
The blood eagle
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Pear of Anguish
The breaking wheel
The bronze bull
The Catherine wheel
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The Spanish Horse
The scolds bridle
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The Heretics Fork
Chinese torture chair
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The intestinal crank
Mother in law
You tapped out
No better answer
Easy way out
Waived white flag
A good call
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Depends on conditions
Avoid in law's
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At all cost
And then some
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Watch your back
And front too
Step very carefully
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Easy does it
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A slippery slope
Take it slow
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Run and hide
Tuck and roll
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Slip and slide
Zig and zag
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Tuck and roll
If you can
Duck and move
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Jump and run
Can't, too old
Bob and weave
Lay flat , pray
Jump and run
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Cut and run
On Mother's Day?
Might as well
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Hit with pan
It really hurt
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My head is
Mother's Day gift
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Wife schooled you
That'll teach ya
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To do that
Or do this
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Take off hunting
Off we go
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Lump number 2
More than likely
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Gonna get another
Big ol bobcat
Watch for him
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Trap is set
Sit and wait
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Wait some more
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Come on man
What's that sound
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Gobbler sneaking in
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Aim at wattles
Shoot him again
Nope. He's done!
Time to eat
A gravy biscuit
With turkey nuggets
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Cold one too
That sounds delicious
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Count me in
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Let's do it
What's for dessert
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Shoe fly pie
Cut a piece
Looks mighty good
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Add ice cream
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2 scoops please
Same for me
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I'll have three
And a nap
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A long one
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Sawing the logs
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Cutting some Z's
Alarm went off
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Hit the snooze
Make the coffee
With peanutbutter toast
Another beautiful morning
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in the woods
As life awakens
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The songs start
A squirrel barks
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gobble in distance
Heart starts pounding
Utttt Ohhhh flatulence!
all too often
Eating own cooking?
McD's does that
Turkeys can't smell
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Good, forgot antiperspirant.
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Forgot the TP
Find some leaves
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Leave 3 be
Leaves of 3
Whoops, too late
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Used the underwear
what a mess
What a smell
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Just like roses
in what world
Mushroom cloud forming
From the blast
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.3 Richter Scale
Mild unmentionable release
Cleaning job complete
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back in business
No holds barred
Ready for anything
Back to hunting
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and getting serious
Looking and listening
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trying to locate
My hunting license
In my Wallet
Wheres my wallet
Starting to backtrack
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Looked in truck
Not found there
Wife has it
Money is GONE
So is wife
Drinking problem gone
I'm much happier
Better things ahead
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Take the cat!!
Keep the dog
Don't look back
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run, run fast
Back to hunting
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For new bride
Put up posters
"must enjoy hunting"
Must own land
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Have a job
Be happy homie!
And pretty too
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and great cook!
A good housekeeper
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Own a truck
And a boat
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With a trailer
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And a Yeti
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Gets shine on
Send photos of......
Submit an application
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One tooth requirement
Two tooth minimum.
Must provide references
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And Medical records
A background report
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their personal information
Plus financial report
With loan history
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Payment plan option
unaltered birth certificate
hospital and location
List of firearms
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Land owning relatives
No tree huggers
Provide voting history
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Family tree diagram
would be helpful
Demonstrate cooking abilities
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Keep beer stocked
In the cooler
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With the ice
Pop the tops
Bring flip flops
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beach and sand
Drinks and bikinis
sunburn and lotion
Surfboard and wax
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Big ocean waves
Bring fishing gear
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Sunscreen and hat
sun is hot
Jumping in water
Fish are biting
Bring the worms
Bait the hooks
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Cast the line
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Wait for bite
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Set the hook
Play it out
Get the net
He's taking drag
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Rod tip up
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But he's leaping
Take up slack
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Tangled in prop
Be careful here
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Sharks swimming nearby
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this is ugly
Im going in
waiting and wondering
Where's he at?
In the house
Hiding under bed
Being really quiet
Should be clear
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To come out
That was close!
Almost was caught
Take a peek
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Be very careful
Fingers are crossed
make this basket...
Underwater basket weaving
Interesting.....
very interesting
Without a snorkel
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Large lung capacity
Her best attributes
Don't look Ethel
Its too late!!
Your in trouble
Voyeurism is illegal
But worth it
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You're a perv!!!

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Moving right along...
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best we leave
Let it go
Ok new day
She'll never drown
need a rope
or something, but
who really cares
not that many
but some will
Hunt another day
Maybe even Sunday
Just start early
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Before rooster crows
and other hunters
Sleep at gate
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Don't forget alarm
Other hunters arrive
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no place to
Take a dump
Where's my paper?
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wasn't delivered yet
Carrier slept in
How many leaves
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Definitely five handfuls
Don't drop them
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Easy does it
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Dont let go
keep after it
White knuckle grip
Getting some cramps
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Try some Midol
that could help
hard to tell
it will happen
Not soon enough
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Apply as needed
slather it on
Biscuits with butter
or maple syurp
pancakes and eggs
With fried potatoes
Onions and peppers
Hot Italian sausage!
Whole wheat toast
With Swiss cheese
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Don't forget the
Red eye gravy
Some thick bacon
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Juicy T-Bone Steak
Fried pork chop
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That's good eaten
Lots of protein
Which we need
For my diet
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And well being
but I still
need a drink
Cold barley pop
think I'll pass
Ice cold brew
Whiskey on ice
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Rum and coke
Just for today
Then tomorrow I
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Live it again
Living the dream
Mine's a nightmare
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I can't escape
Like Freddy's nightmare?
IT GETS WORSE
I keep having.....
The same thing
happening over again
Like groundhog day
Except duckbilled Platypus's
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Only gets better
Thank the Lord
for guidance and
Wisdom to keep
me somewhat sane
Without him I ,
am forever lost
On downward spiral.
help from friends
and or family
Keeps me grounded
and well centered
road to recovery
will be long
But worth it
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in the end.
feeling better already
I am 3rd.
Better than fourth.
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Better all together
Who's on 3rd
I don't know
Trackey is 3rd
:you_rock:
drive him home
Invite for dinner
not this time
show him around
why do that
so he knows
That won't work
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Ohhhh he knows.
Google it :funnyturkey:
knows too much
show him anyway
it's not good
well don't eat
trying not to
good for you
more for us
Share the wealth
But you won't
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Yep you're right
Sharing is caring
about someone else
A little too
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excited for him
made him happy
Snitches get stitches
depends on you
and what transpires
A butt whooping
at school today
Is never good
Looks like detention
It's my fault
should have known
a bad idea
Learned my lesson
The last time
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and the next
day at school
Lunch was gross
Like every day
Let's hit Macdonald's
Then go fishing
at the dam
Get the bait
Grab a pole
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Not my pole
Grab your own
I found one
needs a float
And a sinker
need some hooks
ready to go
Forgot my license
Time to turn
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Yourself around and..
Gun the engine
here we go
for another try
Maybe just maybe
It will run
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like a charm
Watch your speed
Things falling out
On the road
People swerving everywhere
Crashing into trees
Teenagers scare me
They can't drive
They can bellyache
while driving wild
We were wild
And knew everything
about other drivers
And everything else
It was unbelievable
The way he
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Knew what to
say and do
When need be
He's very smooth
Slick like a
Snake oil salesman
Will cure everything
You drink it
At own risk
Proceed with caution
Do not drive
Or operate equipment
While under Influence
drinking this stuff
Kills rodents too
Hair falls out
Left for dead
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But breathing still
On last leg
Time to end
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All this nonsense
you never will
figure this out
Nor want to
Pushing forward strong
Hitting a bump
In the road
Got a flat
And no Jack
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Or a spare
Thumbing a ride
I'll stay back
good for you
Thank you Sir
Somebody gotta watch
while we go
do damage control
Take head count
To make sure
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who got lost
Who needs rescued
sounds like you
Need food, water.
Forgot about phone!
Brought ham radio
and ham sandwich
Bag of chips
and salsa dip
with a soda
Something tells me
This isn't over
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not right now
But soon enough
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lets hope so
Cause we need
A good day
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with no stress
the good life
On a beach
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with a cocktail
And a umbrella
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Prefer some snow
And some ski's
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With a helmet
Helmets are optional
Gloves are not
Skiing isnt fun
Scenery is nice
Don't break leg
snow is packed
Out of control
Watch that tree
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HELP, cant stop!!!
Fall on butt
Back up again
not as fast
But faster than
than I want
A speeding bullet
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Or a locomotive
but able to
keep on going
blindly, into the
woods we go
But first we
need tick spray
Pizza, French fries
and mozzarella sticks
and cold drinks
And toilet paper
To be prepared
After taco meal
Bring some rolaids
tummy is queasy
ready to rip
Oops fart slipped
Oops wet one!
time to change
into some new
Underwear and socks
Right after shower
running late now
Birds with hens
heard a gobble
over the hill
in the distance
but getting closer
Someone just shot
Heard shock gobble
In the distance
on private property
I won't trespass
Call him over
I'm so good
I nearly lost
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all my calls
and head net
Had me rattled
For a little
bit of time
We do recover 8)
and start fresh
What new adventures
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We will remember.
and share with
The future generation
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Happy fathers day
Dad's are special
Yes, we are!
We are best
A relaxing day
time to grill
and enjoy ourselves
Have a beer
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With loved ones
tell some stories
good old day's
Flown by fast
sometime we forget
To clean our
Turkey guns before
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Putting them away
After the Season
than problems develop
Will not fire
this isn't good
rust inside chamber
Should have oiled
My gun after
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the hard rain
Thunder and lightening
gobblers are gobbling
getting somewhat excited
For Fall season
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but prefer Spring
time trout fishing
always good eating
crappie are better
Not much meat
Need stringer full
and then some
Oil to fry
Ketchup and ranch
Ketchup and Horseradish
Steak and fries
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Ham and eggs
Need some roughage!
good for movement
mistakes can happen
Don't overdo it
I always do
Light a match
way too dangerous
Possible gas leak
Parking far away
holding my breath
your turning red
gasping for air
Now turning blue
needing a break
and fresh air
with ice tea
and cool breeze
Thru the trees
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The gobbler glides
to his Hens
and out of
his comfort zone
He's on edge
for whats next
On the menu
Nuggets and BBQ
with peach cobbler
Lsu tigers win
with ice cream
and color sprinkles
On a Boat
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enjoying the view
Overlooking the roost
of several trees
On the limb
Sight to behold
Down he pitches
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gliding towards hens
Across the valley
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Yep, foiled again
Tomorrow another day
with no gobbling
Patience will be
Key to success
relax and enjoy
this fine day
Drumming I hear?
Means he's close
Right behind me
Turn around slowly
hoping this works
Pounding in ears
there he goes
just my luck
Has happened before
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Will happen again
That's just life
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you gotta laugh
and curse him
maybe curse yourself
Only on Friday
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enjoy your weekend
sit back relax
grill and fireworks
a cold beer
Family and friends
Photograph the fireworks
To capture memories
To enjoy later
remembering good times
memories are forever
date and list
people in photos
videos and more
The memories built
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Share with others
Remembering good times
laughing with friends
laughing at ourselves
while on vacation
Rested and relaxed
ready for anything
smelling the roses
On Independence Day
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couldn't be better
Thanks for service
you are welcome
In my home
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Please bring snacks
Beverages are included
And a appetite
don't forget dessert
We pray first.
and give thanks
To our Lord
and all those
Who've gone before
But never forgotten
And ask for
guidance and forgiveness
In Jesus name
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amen, my friends
Now lets eat!
pass the cornbread
Mom made pie
apple pie yummy
vanilla ice cream?
My fathers lasagna
some fried chicken
Out of ketchup
Use hot sauce
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works for me
that's hot stuff
adds some heat
glass of milk
Cools things off
nice rainy afternoon
Sitting and sipping
with my favorite
Lady friend ever
Mothers don't count.
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depends why not
They knew everything :)
Better watch out
and keep looking
over your shoulder
with your eyes
Better listen also
Always on alert
She knows your
Who you are
where you live
wrong house number
drank too much
JUST like you
Feeling a bit
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Overworked and overwhelmed.
Down in dumps
of Lancaster county
where life is
Horse an Buggy
the simple life
with my mule
and my dog
on the porch
sipping sweet tea
What's that smell
Took shoes off
you need help
I'm going to
get more tea
we are out
get to boiling
stove is broken
Use bunsen burner
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no more excuses
we have those
Stored in barn
good hayloft memories
please don't share
my secret location
Oh my Lord
Save my soul
into the water
it's Saturday night
better get one
Before their gone
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$29.95 plus shipping
Blue light special
While supply's last
Only one available
Already have four.
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3 shell limit
That's not enough
make some more
Southern fried chicken
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and some Cornbread
Dont forget beans
and cucumber salad
gravy mashed potatoes
collardgreens beans ham
getting me hungary
Playing country music
All but beans
What's that smell
blame the dog
that was you
burning my eyes
My bad man
there's always one
in every crowd
Weed em out
Bad party fowl
funky chicken dance
Saturday Night Fever
Pain on Sunday
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overcooked fried chicken
Smack your Momma
killed by dad
Weed eater accident
That's so terrible
part of life
now who cooks
The hardy breakfast
biscuits sausage gravy
Pop Tarts maybe
for a snack
Breakfast of Champions!
over fried squirrel
Scrambled pork brains
At Alice's restaurant
Sounds kinda gross
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not at all
is to me
your always complaining
eat more chicken
Beef or pork
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is for Flatlanders
Not ridge runners
Squirrel brain please
Quote from: crow on July 24, 2023, 05:21:24 PM
is for Flatlanders
Drug up mountains
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this ain't California
I hear that
out on that
who has time
for yard work
I sure don't
Chainsaw want start
got one running
Your WAY late
to the party
I mow naked
dont look up
or bend over
it's too late
Bad first impression
Leave right now
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for flydown time
Sunburn on my
head and neck
the perfect shot
long walk back
miss, it's longer
packing up now
head hanging low
come back tomorrow
if I'm lucky
gobbler struts in
that creek bottom
thicker than ever
he's comfortable there
what a gobbler
smart old bird
fun to hunt
with vintage shotgun
and old friend
who can call
JUST like me
with trusty trumpet
in hand, waiting
calling real soft
sweet talking him
On a string
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something's not right
funkychicken fell over
squealing hen calling
best call ever
walnut old yeller
best movie ever
The Wild Bunch
The Brady Bunch
The Hatfield McCoy
feud was epic
War Between States
Warring family members
Good Bad Ugly
Outlaw Josie wales
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The War Wagon
we got offtrack
start a story
train derailed yesterday
causing evacuations nearby
Possible chemicals spilled
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leaching into ground
more fake news
Ya never know!
what to believe
who to trust
nothing you hear
trust the gobble
gotta hear one
DECOY in Field
working for me
until he spooked
NO just cautious
wingbone relaxes him
with soft calling
always overly cautious
WHAT a gobbler
calm your heartbeat
slow and steady
wins the race
gun's rock steady
Then thunder rolls
as lightening strikes
His last gobble
Time to reflect
On a great
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hunt once again
Memories that last
until next time
do it again
later in season
morning comes early
calling my name
But , coffee lst
one to go
before heading out
get your gun
or your bow
time to go
Get that bird
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walking in darkness
gathering my thoughts
Light went dead
stumbling around blind
Stepped on a
the false dawn
Darn cosmic dust
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wearing a mask
For no reason
then to look
AT MY WATCH
Songbirds are singing
life is good
Appreciate the beauty
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and the harmony
chasing those gobblers
Never gets old
but I do
years rolling by
Faster every year
WITH turkey friends
making great memories
For campfire stories
stretching the truth
Like Jim Bridger
and Daniel Boone
or Hugh Glass
very interesting stories
of bygone days
men were men
Women were women
alone the prairie
to the coast
North to Alaska
looking for GOLD
file a claim
partner got shot
outlaw claim jumpers
no-good worthless claim
worth a try
the adventuress spirit
while chasing dreams
maybe some nightmares
when season closes
time to reflect
on wrong doings
quit thinking negative
start thinking positive
i'll never know
nor will I
Wyett Earp went
looking for cowboys
Trouble found him
fighting for justices
another cowboy down
boot hill awaits
"Are we cross?"
I'm Your Huckabee
You're no daisy
Too high strung
walking on water
Peter sure tried
I'm your Huckleberry
Why, Johnny Ringo
are we crossed
Let's do it
just say no
Wish I had
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A million dollars
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I need stuff
more turkey calls
And camera gear
Lots of stuff
so little time
better get busy
Time's a wastin
Winter is coming
We're burning daylight
getting in firewood
You alright boy
My name's Clyde.
I love Winter!
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what a name
better than Horatio
my middle name!
My last name
will never change
Nor want to
because your family
Will shun you
especially at Holidays
They already have!
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for good reason?
eats with fingers
Wipes mouth with
Who wipes mouth?
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family members do
some strange things
down right bizarre
That's my fit!
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now we know!
That I'm strange
among other things!
I hear that!
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Like Gomer Pyle
Shazam Golly Surprise
holy smokes batman!
Book Em Danno!
MY friend Flicka
I Love Lucy
Gilligan's Island
The Brady Bunch
Game of Thrones
Thundarr the Barbarian
This is chaos
Sons of Anarchy
The Twilight Zone
Do do do do but not the poop kind.
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The Perfect Storm
opening day blizzard
with high winds
and driving rain
we continued calling
Everything hunkered down
under rock overhang
water dripping off
Lightning is beautiful
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but getting closer
things are improving
Sun through clouds
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Birds are chirping
Trumpet is singing
gobblers getting firedup
I'm getting excited
NOW calm down ...
get back hunting
heart was racing
mosquitoes are buzzing
It's heating up
Rut is on!
I never..... What?
Putting out corn :OGturkeyhead:
That's just wrong! :TooFunny:
Long standing tradition
In York County?
among other places
deep dark swamps
Wide open hardwoods
It's running Rampant
People don't care
trenches are everywhere
hide and see
I'll be watching
But you won't
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find them all
I can try
Good for you
never give up
Keep hope alive
Get er dun
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Dig it deep
too much work
Call for help
friends don't respond
You're not serious
only friends when......
The bottle's full
or need something
like another bottle
:TooFunny:
Have to drive
Crow can drive
He's not sober
Haw haw haw
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wear your helmet
Maybe a jock
activate air bags
There's trouble ahead
crow still driving
No, just aiming
missed by inches
love cylinder choke
For blasting criminals
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saves on rope
Cowboys need rope
and a horse
Urban cowboys don't
wear gun belts
Also no spurs
cheats at poker
drinks Bud light
or wine coolers
wears strechy jeans
snap button shirts
Flat brim hat
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chews bubble gum
pretends it's Beechnut
big belt-buckle
with leather chaps
pronounces it Rodaeoo,
Cheyenne Frontier Day
various wantabees abound
utube drugstore cowboys
Know the type
likely a poser
Pants in boots
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All warning signs
people with hoodies
I wear hoodies
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during hunting season
when its cold
Not like Fetterman
Who is Fetterman?
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What camo brand
Various mixed matched
Sounds like Goodwill
Mostly Community Aid
year end sales
Its all good
So you say
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let's go shopping
Dollar General Camo?
That's the good
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Everything's a Dollar!
bargains and clearance
Salvation Army has
old bib overalls
all you need
with old sxs
and some TSS
with my satchel
It's a manpurse
that's your opinion
in Pink Camo?
better tip toe
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to the roost
slow and steady
set the anchor
He's the anchor
Bilge plug in
let's go fishing
I like Crappies
walleyes are outstanding
if cooked right
baked or fried
Like mine fried
with white beans
Cold Sweet Tea
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with some friends
enjoying our meal
having some laughs
found a bone
Eat some bread
Tell some stories
remember the time
what a joy
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that will be!
Wives made desserts
look good but
need black coffee
Just one cup
more than enough
Red velvet cake
cookies to dunk
in cold milk
Or even coffee
Or hot chocolate
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and some marshmallows
Broiled deer steak
Wrapped in bacon
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Bacon improves everything!
Even improves bacon!
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Can't go wrong
it did for...
What the heck
just flew by
Wearing pink tutu?!
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Quote from: Tom007 on October 11, 2023, 04:56:44 AM
What the heck
it went wrong for the piggy :TooFunny:
Quote from: Sir-diealot on October 11, 2023, 05:15:29 AM
Wearing pink tutu?!
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faded blue coveralls
with flannel shirt
Poop stained boots
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from standing in
Deep quick sand
or cow manure
makes tomatoes grow
better for salsa
with some peppers
And cheese dip
with Ritz crackers
needs more jalapeño
and some Tums
They work well
For cramps also
might try that
cast iron stomach
you are lucky
Yes I am
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in many ways
Very blessed indeed
we all are
about to be
led to the
local Chinese buffet
and the restroom
NO toilet paper
spare a square
using dollar bills
could be expensive
worth every penny
not to some
don't shake hands
you never know
WHO"S watching you
your computer knows
The Shadow Knows!
What evil lurks
deep in a
vegans tiny heart
drinking veggie shakes
Eatin' Veggie Straws
cheating eating bacon
on turkey burger
with Swiss Cheese
vegans getting happier
When they see
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Fellow unhappy vegans
switching to Carnivore
much better off
depends on mood
just like turkeys
Or the ex
But sometimes she
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needs a Snickers
changes her outlook
On his life
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More favorable outlook
means more hunting
or hunting equipment
Both good prospects
makes me happy
just thinking about
Gifts she'll buy
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Hopefully for me
that will be
Used next season
Good Lord willing
you never know
Could lose foot.
Or even more
important is the
Blood flow to
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all living parts
big and small
big is better
only in texas
never been there
It's very hot
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long way away
a journey of
A thousand miles
1600 for me
More for others
better get started
before too late
been enough already
i totally agree
southward bound now
smokey on bumper
better slow down
Need to go
texting while driving
DEADLY like Drinking
While driving is
unacceptable in my
opinion but I
make things up
as I go
there I'll be
pain and suffering
need not be
take 2 asperin
won't cure this
Turkey Call Fever
start drinking heavily
at better fountain
I need therapy!
won't find here!
none thats believable
could break Bank
going on Springer
We've hit bottom
catfish bite soon
and let's drink
some tasty brews
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and bourbon whiskey
straight, no chaser
good old applejack
crumb cake yum
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Ten Layer Chocolate
road to perdition
Starring Tom Hanks
he should castaway
to Greenbow, Alabama!
Never get found
if messin' around
With a Clown
kick'em while down
backwoods Saturday night
moonshine was involved
Little bit this
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Little bit that
winter time stew
Warms the soul
head to toe
and deep within
Let it begin
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it has begun
Buck are rutting
scraping and rubbing
Signs are there
posted keep out
means good huntin'
or trouble ahead
Fire and Rain
won't stop a
sneaky lowdown trespasser
has no respect
for property owner
nor anything else
born every day!
Twice on Sunday
Lock 'em up
make an example
Chinese water torture
Or even worse
Chinese finger trap
Then itching powder
nothing like waterboard
gets people talking
or drowned one
casualties of war
costs are high
returns are good
Live another day
to fight again
Time to regroup
and assess situation
Figure out whats
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Where to hunt
not my spot
Where's you spot
In the woods
Deep dark woods!
made wrong turn
Where you go
hunters closing in
Three months till
Less for others
How about tomorrow
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Season around corner
May First here.
We can't wait
Cold out side
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ice fishing weather
Spring is coming
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not soon enough
Sound good to
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Its practicing time
Ready to go
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Smoke a jellyhead
Hunting the pines
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could be good
Has in past
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Worked out great
On opening day
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Will be hunting
The wild turkey
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Eastern for me
Like them too
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Only one hunted
In the rain
could be miserable
Need good blind
and protect calls
poncho might work
some bread bags
Should work fine
better than nothing
might get wet
ceramic might work
WHAT"S for supper
Grandpa Jones knows
good country cooking
at its best
Old Country Store
Feels like home
but's is not
Pretty darn close
To the original
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which is nice
worth the drive
and time spent
with good people
nobody brought beer........
NO mother-in-law came
which is good
depends on her
and the situation!
Good lord, what?
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she is evil
mine was not
Sweet as honey
you were lucky
Not so sure
One never knows
What's coming next
might surprise you
best be ready
anything could happen
watch your back
And your sides
because that lil
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joker might just
Be the best
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thing for you
and your friend
to mess with
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its about time
Load them up!!!!
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steady the course
onward we go
into the fray
Bring us back
in one piece
Game in hand
two in bush
Send in dogs
maybe they'll flush
Allowing us opportunities
To eat Dinner
at your house
better eat out
that bad huh?
L.O.L.
When we going
Uses smoke Alarm
as food timer
Gotta remember that!
for future reference
Six Thirty Five.
In the beginning
was The Word
and the Word
was with God
And the word
was GOD. AMEN!!!
At my house
King of glory
Lord and Savior
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Yes! I Beleive!
In The Father
And The Son
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and Holy Ghost
I am Saved
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Praise the Lord
bless his name
all Nature sings!
Life begins again
Let's go hunting
Na, I'm skiing.
Poor Sonny Bono
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What about him?
Deadly skiing accident
Hit a tree
long black train
things do happen
for a reason
Tis the season
This is treason
Things to ponder
From over yonder
Couldn't help wonder
How it happened
On that day
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before the sun
came up over
The ridge line
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Warming the day
with the sun
In his eyes
Blinding his vision
Awaiting his fate
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time has come
retire from work
start hunting more
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enjoy my time
Those you love.
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by your side
number one priority
Is my family
Faith first always
Put God first
Amen to that
Say it again
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Say it again
Amen to that
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Stand and Chant
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while your here
before we leave
to go hunting
Double check everything
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make you've got
Ammo for gun
and your calls
and your gloves
But make sure
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it's not raining
you'll get wet
and be miserable
Weather the storm
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Guesswho should stay
that he should
Rise kill eat
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He's the glue!
keeps it together
Come back home
it's supper time
Liver with onions
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don't sound bad
Carmilize the onions
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season the liver
WHO's on first?
What's on second
Now steal third!!!
Made it Home
Never heard Home
Strike him out
Strike WHO out?
The dude batting
Who is batting?
What is catching
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I don't know
Yes, second base.
It's beyond me
beyond me too
Over my head
Under my feet
where he belongs
After the shot
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time for pictures
Relax a little
Give him thanks
Praise the Lord
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forever and ever
Thanks for returning
my dog home
Baby got back
With colar intact.
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Without a scratch
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maybe some ticks
Parmitheran will work
but be careful
spray on clothes
Just let dry
Stuff works great
Without a doubt
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No more tics
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or any chiggers
still got skeeters
Bring your Thermacell
Always have one
When they attack
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just fight back
kill 'em all
carry many viruses
not to me.
To each person
have his own
gun to use
I sure will
never give up
With tuff times
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makes one stronger
and one smarter
and more seasoned
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when it counts
In the moment
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don't be scared
just be cautious
Don't trust government
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Trust you earn
Actions meet words
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just do it
But be careful
In the woods
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also everywhere traveled
You never know
what might happen
before you leave
Zipper your fly
tie your tie
Buckle your belt
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Or get ticket
to the game
Peanuts popcorn here
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Want cold beer
not for me
stopped long ago
Feeling much better
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good to know
Starting all over
Strong coffee and
Early morning sunrises
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hard to beat
when weathers nice
lovely when snowy
don't get much
No sledding today
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because it's raining
It's drinking weather
Lots of water
good for you
Plenty of rest
Ready to Go!
Let's get it
Count me in!
Tuff times ahead
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Never give up
The Boney patch
They're pretty sweet
While they last
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order them early
paid up front
get some too
Double the price
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Half the product.
twice the enjoyment
can't go wrong
With fried crappie
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No ball bearings
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Hub needed grease
Three squirts only
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Lube it up
for safe driving
Gotta go fast
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Whoa too fast
gotta slow down
Gotta speed up
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please don't crash
Better buckle up
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Crash test dummy.
talked too much
Duct taped mouth
tape didn't stick
Made in China
With planned obsolescence
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And well executed
I'll fix that
I believe you!
Better look out
Step very carefully
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Wear Snake Boots
for safety's sake
Don't shoot shotgun
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Into your foot
While jumping away
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Don't fall down
While chasing gobblers
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through the woods
over the river
Thru the hills
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Up the canyon
At grandmas house
good home cookin'
Hot coffee brewin
Makin the bacon
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Fried Country Ham
Creamed Chipped Beef
And a partridge
A pear tree
Roasted with gravey
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Sliced turkey breast
time to eat
What's for dessert
Sweet Potato Pie
With whip cream
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Out a cannon
That sounds messy!
In the toilet
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flush it away
What a disaster
Scene after hurricane
Let's help out
With gloves on
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ready to sanitize
with really hot
water and cleaners
Dishes are clean
Time for desert
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Belly is full
That blackberry cobbler
Is so good
need second helping
topped with icecream
And whipped cream
Á la mode
need to exercise
Burpes are fun
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Discretion is advised
only have one
100 Burpees today
excuse me please
eat in moderation
hard to do
Just takes discipline
Padlock the pantry
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Don't lose keys
Really need them
In a pinch
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to help us
over the edge
the Turkey flew
From a roost
to the ground
on the move
never seen again
The old screen
Flew wide open
Keep this going
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Like a train
down the track
Chugging a long
Brakes don't work
time to bail
Back to top
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Here we go
More more more
Less is better
More is wanted
at what cost
Different for everyone
Same for some
Good for all
Life, Liberty, and
Happiness for all
Prosperity be yours
We the people
Shall rise up
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To be victorious
For the USA
Amen and Amen
Said in church
The highest power
Praise His name
He's coming back
He will rise
From His throne
Blew his trumphet
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All to hear
For the rapture
Bow your head
In His reverence
Best be ready!
Better ask forgiveness
Believe the Gospel
Understand the word
He who believes
Has eternal life
Never go back
He will forgive
All our sins
Will be forgiven
Andy be cleansed
Receive life eternal
Bow your head
Receive His free
Be thankful eternally
Gift of Salvation
To us all
He will rein
He has risen
On His throne
He looks down
He will return
Oh gracious day
Sun will shine
On the earth
Down from Heaven
Trump of God
Trumpets will sound
Everyone will bow
Bless this day
Not promised tomorrow
God is good
God is Great
All the time
Here right now
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In our presence
Praise the Lord
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Through the ages
Love shall endure
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Available to everyone
Who shall ever
See the light
Trust the process
All works out
Everyone wins today
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Maybe, maybe not
Simply trust in
What's in store
down the road
Only two choices
right or wrong
Up or down
Don't choose wrong
Live with consequences
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But for those
Who know better
Mom always did
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She was wise
Beyond her years
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Then comes eternity
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Eternity is forever
Never ending life
Life after death
Goes on forever
Does not end
Like a lie
With life choices
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Actions have consequences
Consequences are life
Decisions are made
Right or wrong
Try to learn
Learn by dpinh
From other's mistakes
Mistakes can happen
Learn from them
And help others
Gift of giving
Is to giver
Praise the lord
He is good
He is perfect
Everybody has flaws
And needs forgiveness
but never forget
What he did
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no second chances
If you lie
Consequences are severe
Think about them
Ponder the why
Look in mirror
Improve on that
Make an effort
Always use finesse
Face the truth
Always the truth
Sets you free
Free for everyone
Don't be afraid
Have some faith
or some confidence
Stand up tall
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Have total confidence
Just do it
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Don't be afraid
Trust the process
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All works out
Must be strong
Have no fear
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Jump right in
Go for it
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Try your best
Just keep trying
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Never give up
Till last breath
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Persistence pays off
Worth the wait
Don't force it
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let it develope
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Patience is key
Calm like cat
Sleeping on couch
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Is good when
It all works
Trust the process
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Start the day
With a prayer
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and hot coffee
Bacon and eggs
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Omelet with cheese
Gotta love breakfast
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biscuits and gravy
Eggs and toast
With orange juice
Straight up black
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Cup of coffee
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Hold the creamer
Hold the sugar
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Sugar free donuts
Are not good
Skip the donuts
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Have an apple
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Granola and coffee
What a combination
Starting out right
My morning start
What about lunch
Turkey hunting lunch
Apples and jerky
Water and sandwich
Venison jerky
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Be alert for
The red head
Peaking through brush
Can see you
Butter not move
he is watching
Fear the putt
Off he goes
I should quit
Why? Relax, enjoy!
Where when how
Always next turkey
Time to call
Yelp yelp yelp
Cluck cluck cluck
Gobble gobble gobble
Big bird down
Give great thanks
To our savior
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For our salvation
Plus many blessings
God is generous
Love and mercy
Hope and kindness
Humble and kind
Willing to forgive
All who walk
With the Lord
All day everyday
Bow thy head
Praise the lord
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Turkey season opens
Turkey season ends
Grateful for season
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Truely am Blessed
Gobbler or not
Enjoyed the hunt
Now the fun
Boat on lake
Canadian outpost adventure
Fly in fishing
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Remote outpost camp
Camping in wilderness
Enjoying Mother Nature
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Watch those vipers
And joro spiders
But enjoy it
None the less
Build camp fire
Get dinner ready
Build a smore
Glass of milk
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Lots of oreos
Or chocolate chips
Want some now
Stores have them
Good evening snack
Makes me sleep
Need bigger belt
Need more milk
got to dunk
They are delicious
Should eat healthier
Not as fun
Better for ya
Helps lose weight
A longer life
Chase turkeys easier
call them in
Shoot 'em close
So they flop
Walk out victorious
With big grin
And good eats
Save the beard
Save the spurs
collect gizzard stones
May find gold
That be nice
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Mount tail fan
Have memories forever
Thankful for turkey
And the opportunity
Enjoy His creation
Such beauty everywhere
Nature is astounding
His handiwork displayed
Everyone to see
He created all
All can enjoy
For His glory
The heavens declare
Glory of God
God is good
All the time
Hundred percent facts
Next turkey season
I can't wait
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Until spring time
Deer season next
how about fishing
Just cleaned fish
Love fish fillets
Good fried whole
Baked with parmeson
Makes mouth water
As it should
Should fish tomorrow
Don't miss many
Fish every chance
Caught em today
How many keepers?
76 froze up
Big meal coming!
What about dessert
Baked apple pie
Black berry cobbler
With Ice cream
Homemade ice cream
Get three scoops
Watch those calories
Wear sweat pants
Only live once
It's worth it
Its good anytime
Napkins are available
Paper plates too
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Don't forget brownies
Don't forget cookies
Need some tiramisu
Don't forget milkshake
Extra thick milkshake
Dairy Queen Blizzard
Wendys Chocolate Frosty
Gotta have fries
Love their chilli
The burning Man
The running man
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The invisible man
Hard to see
Won't spook birds
Birds of a
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Feather flock together
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This includes turkeys
Also includes grouse
Squirrels not really
they run together
Like best friends
They are nutty
They definitely crazy
Like to climb
Gnaw on nuts
all day long
way too noisy
Flick their tail
Run up trees
Bark at you
Bark right back
Make them mad
Bite you bad
Make head shot
Make squirrel gravy
And homemade biscuits
spit out shot
Crack a tooth
Scratching their fleas
Back to dentist
Get a shot
Fix the tooth
A gold crown
No more squirrels
Plenty of nuts
Plenty of game
Shoot ground hogs
But don't eat
Probably not good
young ones are
Generally more tender.
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Coyotes like them
Bean eating machine
Have own holiday
Can predict weather
Not real accurate
Weatherman isn't either
Right or wrong
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Spring or winter
Summer or fall
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Summer is hot
Fall is pleasant
Love the colors
Ducks are migrating
Geese flying south
Doves are first
Hunt dove fields
Jalapeño dove breast
Sounds really good
Is really good
Salmon are swimming
Salmon tastes great
Smoked salmon patte
Cedar planked salmon
Making me hungry
I'm always hungry
Like a bear
Not as hairy
Burger and dog
Steak and eggs
Father's Day weekend.
Enjoy with family
Backyard cook out
Shrimp chicken kabobs
God and Family!
Making great memories
And great stories
Lots to appreciate
Gifts from God
Praise the Lord
And his holiness
God is Good
God is great
All the time
Happy Father's Day
Best dad ever
Praise all Fathers
A sons hero
The guiding light
Set an example
Next right thing
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Thanks for all
God is faithful
We should be
talking about turkeys
What turkeys doing?
Poults just hatched
Hens teaching poults
Keep them safe
From all predators
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Always on lookout
Bobbing the head
Looks through trees
At a turkey
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Be perfectly still
When behind tree
Get gun ready
Get camera ready
Call or don't
Jake or hermit
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Jakes always curious
Toms always cautious
Toms very sly
and somewhat slippery
Like a Ninja
in the fog
A true adversary
Can disappear easily
Without a trace
Into the foliage
Behind a tree
Sneak up behind
Like a ninja
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Into thin air
Like a ghost
Left scratching head
Wonder what happened
Saw a hen
He liked her
The real deal
can't beat that
Lived another day
Hear squirrel barking
Hear jay squawking
Another turkey coming?
Sure hope so
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Its a deer
Nice big buck
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A small doe
live another day
Enjoy another sunrise
Enjoy woods waking
In the morning
Song birds singing
woods comes alive
All is good
God is awesome
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Enjoy the day
Full of gratitude
For everything provided
Tip the hat
To the Creator
Of all things
Enjoy the best
Time goes fast
Older means faster
Seasons change quicker
You get older
faster it seems
Hold them tight
Make great memories
Look all around
Take it in
Soak it up
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share with friends
New chapters begin
Old ones close
Remember the past
people who passed
Don't waste time
you may regret
Living in past
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In the moment
Exposed to light
and the darkness
Get to choose
I choose LIGHT
Shine for God
for your family
Each new day
Brings joy, happiness
Live in moment
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Plan for future
Appreciate time spent
Never get back
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Always look forward
To new opportunities
To new horizons
And bright future
Free for all
Always new adventures
Into the future
unknowing, unsure excited
Never lack courage
Always be positive
Persistence pays off
benefits one greatly
Keep going forward
Positive attitude always
The sun rises
The sun sets
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World goes by
Faster every day
Older you get
Days go slow
Years go fast
Don't slow down
Smell the roses
Enjoy the moment
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Gone too quick
Never too old
Just do it
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The sun sets
In the west
Over the mountains
Rises in East
Beautiful morning sun
Charts its course
Straight like arrow
Up high above
Through the horizon
Falling into oblivion
Casting its rays
Upon the earth
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Warms the earth
warms the soul
For all mankind
To enjoy forever
Creation tells story
Of God's greatness
There for everyone
Gift for all
All to embrace
The gift of
hunting in America
Always a gift
To enjoy outdoors
with friends, family
Teaching next generation
Beauty of nature
Bald eagle flying
Ability to enjoy
Watching it soar
The American symbol
Strength, courage, freedom
The American Way
We The People
Of the united
States of America
Ohio, Texas, Wisconsin
Buckeyes, alamo, cheese
Are American Treasures
to be preserved
Forever and ever
Star spangled banner
God bless America
Land of freedom
Red White Blue
Flying high above
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The Rocky Mountains
Snow capped peaks
Elk in valleys
Bears in blueberries
Mules on trails
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Trout in streams
peaceful and relaxing
Lots to see
A true masterpiece
A wonderful place
To be in
Camp for awhile
Time for reflection
Setup the tent
Get fire going
Cook some dinner
Sit by fire
Enjoy the stars
Relax into nite
Enjoying the sunset
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Make some coffee
Wake before daylight
eat some breakfast
Plan the day
Take a walk
Along the stream
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Enjoy the sounds
Watch for bears
and enjoy ourselves
Don't get eaten
Carry bear spray
If it's needed
Spray the face
Spray with Lead
Stops the threat
Lead gets thumbs-up
Quote from: Lcmacd 58 on June 24, 2024, 01:34:13 PMLead gets thumbs-up
That's Four words!
:fud: :OGani:
Got to start it over :blob10:
Away we go
Follow the rules
Of the game
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Rule number one
Three word story
Should we camp
Should we hunt
All day everyday
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Wake up early
Hit the woods
in the dark
Use the moonlight
Lights will spook
Almost all wildlife
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even some humans
Always be safe
Look both ways
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Be on lookout
For shady peeps
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Hope you're packing
Always shoot straight
Know your target
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Look beyond target
To the horizon
Over the hill
I'm still kicking
Keep on pushing
Just keep going
Never give up
You got this
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Always move forward.
One more step
keep the faith
Always look ahead
Beware of pitfalls
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Always stay alert
Don't get sidetracked
Finish the race.
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Always be alert
for whats ahead
Watch for danger
its always lurking
But enjoy adventure
Embrace the opportunity
While you can
Time is precious
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Older you get
It goes faster
Day by day
Make good memories
Embrace the young
teach your children
As you should
To be appreciative
And to enjoy
And to respect
All living things
We are stewards
Care for all
Respect God's creation
Always respect God
Enjoy chasing turkeys
While you can
because things change
Life always changes
Change is constant
Pain is motivating
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Can be debilitating
Beautiful sunny day
good for fishing
Drowning a worm
Watching that bobber
Taking a walk
Better fishing spot
Set the hook
Its a smallie
But not small!
Get the net
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Don't tip boat
Boat flip him
Can he swim
Can only float
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Sink like lead
Luckily waters shallow
Only hurt pride
Luckily can stand
Can dry off
Dive back in
And cool off
Float on back
Like beached whale
Looking in mirror?
Will never tell
Float to shore
Now cannon ball?
Yes for sure
just have fun
Let one rip
Fish from bank
Fish from boat
Fish from jetty
Just go fish
relax and enjoy
Filet the catch
It's dinner time
What's for dessert
Warm apple cobbler
vanilla ice cream
Strawberry short cake
More fresh fish
Do night fishing
Be extra careful
Hook a catfish
Dang Mr. Whiskers
Is good eating
if cooked right
Most things are
Fry the fillets
All about preparation
Flathead is best
Never tried noodling
Its wholesome fun
it looks interesting
Don't be Squamish
very small needle
Crappie tastes great
Bream is awesome
Sometimes called bluegill
Kin to redear
Sometimes call shellcracker
Never ate Bluegill
always tossed back
Kept big bluegill
Very delicious fish
Trout good also
Baked or fried
Usually fried filets
Fried tastes great
All in preparation
And hard work
Usually pays off
Years of fishing
Sometimes they bite
fishing is relaxing
It can be
depending on conditions
Tournaments are not
Always for fun
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Don't always catch
Definitely beats working
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Or mowing grass
or pulling weeds
Or using weedeater
Or cleaning coop
Or cleaning gutters
Or cleaning period
Cleaning never fun
Unless cleaning turkey
Shooting a turkey
Very special experience
Hunting with grandpa
Wish I could've
Same here too
Pass it on
Take kids hunting
Show the kids
Make good memories
Make good sportsman
people in general
Who enjoy nature
Who are appreciative
what life offers
Respectful of nature
Lots to enjoy
Nature is astounding
An amazing system
Designed by God
As all things
need managed properly
Not politically motivated
Tend to nature
Using good logic
Common sense helps
Nature is simple
And beautifully designed
People manage poorly
What God gave
We should value
Enjoy the adventure
Embrace the opportunity
Go for it
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Don't look back
Take it in
Enjoy the moment
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while they last
You never know
What tomorrow brings
Live your dreams
Always dream bigger
You can succeed
Trust the process
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love the process
Even when you
Don't want to
Freedom of choice
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The American way
By the People
To go and
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Make own path
learn from mistakes
And help others
Lead by example
Gift of giving
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A cheerful giver
Give your best
give something back
Be an example
Kids need it
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Adults need it
True statement there
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The best kind
Honesty best policy
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Very very true
gotta build trust
Then comes respect
Then comes loyalty
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All wrapped up
World needs more
Peace love respect
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Strong family values
Starts at birth
Generous with love
Makes strong bond
That lasts forever
Yes it does
So does Superglue
Keep off fingers
don't touch anything
That won't break
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J-B Weld works
Belzona even better
Happy Independence Day!
Fourth of July
Let freedom ring
Everyone be careful
Enjoy your day
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Friends and family
Ya'll be safe
You as well
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Its pretty warm
Enjoy bottle rockets
All the pyro
Enjoy Roman candles
Kids and sparklers
Kids catching fireflies
Kids being kids
Light up skies
Bursting in Air
A nighttime spectacle
Flash and bang
Rockets red glare
The bombs bursting
In the air
Wave the flag
to organize around
With fellow Americans
around the world
For our Freedom
And our Liberty
a coming together
To meet about
To socialize together
On same team
All as One
United we stand
Divided we fall
We will stand
For the flag
to show respect
And honor too
Labor Day next
Back to school
Set alarm clock
Canada trip next
Thermacell bug spray
Don't forget it
Mosquitoes are bad
They can bite
Itch like crazy
they draw blood
Black flies too
Chiggers are horrible
Could ruin trip
Turkey mites itch
Are little ticks
They really itch
Should not scratch
Infection is serious
Carry Lyme Disease
Carry Spotted Fever
No more meat
Can't go vegan
Don't want to
Would be horrible
Balance is key
To healthy life
and sound mind
That is true
Balance chasing turkeys
A healthy lifestyle
Body and mind
Exercise and meditation
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A proper mindset
Leads to success
Practice makes perfect
Takes hard work
Don't give up
stay the course
It's a marathon
Living the dream
Keep heading forward
just do it
Will pay off
If you try
Do your best
Try your hardest
Never give up
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If you fail
Try it again
Don't ever quit
Quitters never win
Winners never quit
Even when they
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Hit rock bottom
Think all's lost
Keep on trucking
The winners way
Persistence is key
Mind over matter
Willpower to overcome
Try your best
Trust in God
trust in yourself
Always work hard
Reap the benefits
Keep on track
have a plan
Plan the work
If you can
Work the plan
best you can
Don't get discouraged
Always be positive
Do things right
It pays off
Will never regret
When hunting don't
Forget the gun
Or dude wipes
What the heck?
come in handy
Wipes very important
Don't forget shells
At least three
Or the calls
and some snacks
And the gloves
Fully charged phone
Picture of strutter
All fanned out
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On the tailgate
taking ride home
Home sweet home
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Sweet home Alabama
Where the sky's
Are so blue
I'm coming home
After I finish
My daily chores
Finish the race
Never back down
keep on pushin
Never quit trying
Keep moving forward
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Towards the goal
Step by step
Slow and steady
Wins the race
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Race of life
Enjoy the ride
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Smell the flowers
Along the way
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Always be kind
And go fishing
enjoy your life
As you should
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there's no guarantee
Tomorrow will arrive
Always be thankful
So many blessings
Be kind always
little more empathetic
Lot more caring
The golden rule
Do unto others
As you would
Have them do
Unto you - God
Bless us all
That's the word
On the street
And everywhere else
For us all
To enjoy life
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To its fullest
Each and everyday
Life is great
depending on circumstances
Circumstances can change
if you try
Then you're winning
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Its a lifestyle
Walk by faith
Side by side
Hand in hand
United we stand
You will conquer
And will overcome
Divided We Fall
One under GOD!
Always...never waiver
Life is difficult
Ups and downs
Ins and outs
Of turkey calling
Cluck purr yelp
Wait and listen
Time to move
He just gobbled
Back against tree
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Gun on knee
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That stupid fence
Blew my pattern
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Hes going away
Play another day
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Time to rest
Recoup your energy
check my gear
Chalk the calls
Wipe down gun
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Play the Trumpet
Three note yelp
And then wait
Sleep very little
Listen for drumming
Look for sign
Scratch the leaves
Slap the leg
wait some more
Listen for crows
Enjoy mother nature
relax listen learn
Woodsmanship is key
And being patient
And don't move
They are sly
Like a fox
On the prowl
See thru trees
Just don't sneeze!
Let them look
For the cluck
they will come
Fun to wait
Fun to watch
Fun to participate
great day outdoors
In the woods
Uttttt Ohhhh! A
Bobcat sneaking up
Spooks the tom
He took flight
Till another time
Live another day
An epic hunt
Hunt again tomorrow
A new ridge
all new adventures
Hopefully no bobcat
Silence all morning
they will come
Just need time
Gotta change something
or they will
Go somewhere else
Switch box calls
try the pot
try different calls
Run the trumpet
Clucks and purrs
Triple cluck run
Less is more
Sit very still
Trust the setup
Don't even breathe
time stands still
So much fun
Don't blink either
Gun on knee
Keep eyes peeled
I see Him
he sees you
Like a picture
who moves first
You better not
Let him move
Time to concentrate
It's a hen!
The tom's following
Stomach is rumbling :-[
Grab some grub
my snickers bar
And stay hydrated
Drink some water
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Shouldn't be moving
👀 thru trees
they see everything
Crows are cawing
Squirrels are chattering
Then he gobbles!
He is close
my eyes scanning
Is that him?
no, false alarm
time for nap
Don't think so
Snakes seek warmth
Be on lookout
Ole forked tongue
laying in wait
Camouflage is phenomenal
Easily stepped on
Won't like it
Don't watch it
Buy snake boots
our some gaiters
Always tread carefully
Watch each step
Around each corner
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A new opportunity
always presents itself
Run with it
Always be prepared
You never know
It could prosperous
When least expected
Trust and Obey
Always be optimistic
Go with it
with some uncertainty
always be careful
Always tread lightly
Both eyes open
ready for anything
Always be prepared
You never know
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May be prosperous
Worth the effort
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Worth the risk
Take the plunge
You may enjoy
Have the faith
to push forward
It's an adventure
Enjoy the ride
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while you can
Never too old
Change the subject
Hens poults toms
Don't forget jakes
Ocean river stream
Turkeys can fly
over my head
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Need some help
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Before he gets
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Too far up
Up the mountain
On rocky trail
Quality boots needed
Take walking stick
Pack in less
Only the essentials
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Lighten your load
walk with purpose
fulfill your goal
You'll be glad
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Always be positive
Or be negative
Its your choice
Its your life
Step by step
Inch by inch
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Day by day
you move forward
Know matter what
we continue on
Through the turmoil
And Lifes pleaaures
Gods got you
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Always follow him
Walk by faith
Not by sight
You'll hit obstacles
Makes faith stronger
makes you stronger
It gets easier
Time heals everything
You will see
just gotta believe
Give it time
To sink in
Consume it completely
Time to reflect
Smell the roses
Always be joyful
hard to do
It takes effort
And some commitment
Trust your gut
It always knows
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Not always gas
you never know
Its an experience
Will ruin day
And your clothes
What a surprise
Not always good
Heed the Call
Keep the Faith
Resist the urge
Most stay committed
And some don't
care what happens
Could be embarrassing
Maybe life changing
needs to happen
Feel the joy
it takes time
And considerable dedication
Reap the rewards
Small things count
acts of kindness
Always be receptive
To others feelings
You never know
Who's watching you
It's your decision
right or wrong
When tou wake
Help one another
Have Their Back
Watch out continuously
Both eyes open
Look behind you
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don't trust anyone
Always be alert
Trust your Mom
Moms are precious
Moms know best
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Yes she does
they know everything
Honor your mother
And your father
Lesson for life
only have one
One and only
life to live
Life to enjoy
Family is important
Family values matter
Builds strong foundation
Strong inner self
Integrity is key
Sets the example
Always be positive
Even if others
Don't think so
some don't care
Some never will
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Make the effort
Its your choice
Keep the Faith
Never give up
Keep moving forward
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Always 1 step
At a time
Don't look back
over your shoulder
Eyes forward direction
Seize the Day!
Gone too soon
but fondly remembered
during the night
A goodnight sleep
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Enter the sandman
an imaginary man
Some will recognize
And others wont
Even try once
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ya just gotta
Take a chance
Nothing to lose
All or nothing
Alot to lose
roll the dice
be a winner
Winners never quit
Quitters never win.
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take a chance
You'll never know
You must try.
see what happens
don't give up
Rinse and repeat
Keep on swinging
for the fence
Hit home run
Play to Win
Achieve your goal
Manage your time
Learn from mistakes
and move forward
Eye the prize
Reach finish line
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Head held high
Enjoy the Spoils
Not always monetary
but from within
A good heart
Life's greatest gifts
Are usually free
But not always
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Some are costly
And teach best
learn from mistakes
Adversity is opportunity
Accept constructive criticism
welcome the opportunity
Always be positive
be open minded
Exactly be teachable
Gain the respect
Hippocrates not allowed
nor are tolerated
Not even wanted
Will not enter
Positive mental attitude
Strive for excellence.
Accept nothing less
Do your best
No matter what
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Try to improve
along the way
Smell the flowers
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Not prickers though
Take the time
to enjoy life
Easy does it
Steady going forward
take baby steps
Don't look back
eye on prize
just stay focused
No matter what
Keep the faith
Hold the Course
Straight and narrow
Just do it!
Always Faith first
and blind ambition
Always good choices
Do your best
you will succeed
In the end
Be a champion
never a loser
Always a fighter
until the end
Make it last
take your shot
Don't rush shot
slow and steady
Easy does it
Just for today
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relax and enjoy
The view from
A child's eye
innocent and instinctive
Wholesome and clear
Pure and gentle
until they age
Time march's on
Clock keeps ticking
Git r done
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Haste makes waste
measure it twice
And cut once
To avoid mistakes
Pay attention forward
take your time
Pay strict attention
Patience is key
Attention to details
makes the difference
Makes you happy
pleased with results
Results are satisfying
not all results
Good results are
results can vary
Nothing is guaranteed
nor is promised
Expectations are high
They should be
And they are
Not giving to
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Maximum performance always
Do your best
To change world
start with one
Start with yourself
Learn new perspectives
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Take a breath
Then push forward.
moving very cautiously
1 eye open
focused and calculating
Don't be afraid
Step by step
you inch closer
to the edge
wondering, what if?
I should jump
With both feet
Get all wet
possibly causing problems
Open wound infected
It won't heal
go to doctor
most guys wont
But most should
Must be smart
Use common sense
Leaves Democrats out.
Say that again
Leaves Democrats out.
I'll second that
All in favor
I'm in favour
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All say I
I and AMEN
Keep politics out
Of the bar
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could cause fights
That's never good
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But it happens
Such is life
Out of hell
Came Jesus Christ
Our Fathers son
did he hunt
He did fish
And he taught
Loving and caring
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fishing, no hunting?
He was hunted
And widely persecuted
aren't we all
Change is needed
at what price
He hunted souls
Do not judge
Judgement comes easy
Especially of others
and not ourselves
Man in mirror
mirror maybe cracked
Maybe bad luck
old wives tale
Don't get trapped
In false beliefs
or ancient history
always move forward
at least try
That's great advice
some will listen
Some will not
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It's not easy
Just do it
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You'll be happier
Exactly no regrets
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only live once
Maybe nine lives
two if lucky
Happy with one
struggle with one
Day by day
Night by night
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step by step
Inch by inch
we move forward
Never looking back
Establishing your future
wondering, hoping, wishing
Doing the work
putting in time
Rewards to follow
in due time
Always be positive
And stay focused
Eye on target
with a purpose
Goal in mind
Score a touchdown
if not penalized
Run or pass
Fumble or completion
part of statistics
Numbers confuse me
Life confuses me
Me as well
Shouldn't be complicated
we create complications
Be more relaxed
And enjoy life
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Keep it simple
Positive
Mental
Attitude
Goes along way
to your happiness
And well being
Amen to that
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Balance is key
So is faith
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Faith always wins
So does love
Faith love happiness
sounds good but
Hard to achieve
You gotta try
Don't complicate things
Keep it simple
don't involve others
You and god
Definitely involve God
True statement there
God always first
God and family
Together as one
the perfect balance
It sure helps
Walk the line
Sometimes it's confusing
search for clarity
Trust in yourself
Set reasonable goals
and reward yourself
You deserve it
Positive
Mental
Attitide
Goes along way
for better life
Live the life
That you deserve
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We all deserve
some not all
Must be optimistic
Recognize negative thinking
all around us
Set the tempo
Control your destiny
Make it great
You deserve it
Day by day
Night by night
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Seize the Day
Seize the moment
Seize the advantage
Moment by moment
As time passes
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Memories become dearer
Day by Day
Work towards goals
Be goal driven
not by greed
But by need
To take control
of your life
Nobody else can
join the army
After graduating school
learn some discipline
Instilled during childhood
That's absolutely true
Not these days
It should be
Be the example
That ship sailed
Towards the sunset
Into the sunset
Boat goes sailing
with peoples dreams
for better life
A stronger existence
When you seek
truth and clarity
You find answers
if you search
And you listen
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to good advise
Good things happen
waited for years
What's another day
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to find happiness
some never will
Experience true love
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nor true happiness
Will you'll find
I have lost
My mind today
find it tomorrow
Or next day
still can't remember
where my keys
On the dresser
Next to watch
In the drawer
By the clip
Where's the clip
On right side
For right handed
Sheep on right
Stay off left!
Behind your cologne
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You will find
what you need
At that moment
Maybe, maybe not
Time will tell
Anything is possible
Pray for it
Pray for it
In gods time
The only way
There are others
Who believe differently
and know more
About making cheese
or making money
No, not really.
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got to believe
it can happen
with hard work
And some patience
and also faith
Substance hoped for
God created all!
Christmas is soon!
Let it snow
on Christmas only
Amen to that
'tis the season
to be jolly
hang up mistletoe
drink some eggnog
Wrap some presents
watch some football
Fry Country Ham
Potatoes, green beans
Gather with family
Make great memories
Taking many pictures
Hoping people leave
Eat leftovers tomorrow
Always taste better
Some actually do!
If cooked right
or hungry enough
good to me!
Vegetable they are
like tossed salads
with leftover Pizza
And chocolate cake
with cold milk
that's good eatin'
like black-eyed peas
Happy New Year
Ham and beans
Chitlins & collard greens
Fried chicken gizzards
Think I'll pass
I'm with you
Be adventurous lads!!!
Liver is worse
No argument here.
I hate Rumaki
bacon, chicken liver
It isn't good
Doesn't sound it
Come on spring
I getting excited
To get out
Really fired up
to see if
turkeys are gobbling
and strutting too
Spitting and drumming
better be ready
time to resupply
Get in shape
Do NOT blink
Or you'll miss
but try again
It is addictive
most things are
Turkey calls are
Are great tools
In the hands
Practice makes perfect
Can't practice enough
especially with Trumpets
Don't forget wingbones
Mouth calls too
they sound great
so do Tubes
In the ears
You lost me
sending search party
Look for flairs
or a light
in the darkness
picking up trail
Follow the sign
not to close
Just back enough
Don't get winded
Could be over
Dont start over
Keep moving forward
Eyes searching constantly
Look for motion
Eyes will shine
Maybe hear something
A faint gobble
a twig snaps
Steps in leaves
He sees movement
just sit still
Do NOT blink
Or you'll miss
Hold your breath
Wait for opportunity
Slowly squeeze trigger
Keep sights steady
Both eyes open
to be able
To see him
prop is solid
Breathing is controlled
click, I forgot
Load your gun
Quiet,BUT Quickly
Before he flys
Before he sees
he is alarmed
make your move
Squeeze the trigger
Thank the Lord
All went well
Time to reflect
Look deep inside
Treasure the moment
It is special
Every Day Is
a fresh start
Enjoy God's creation
As we should
Each new sunrise
New opportunity presents
Hit the woods
Always enjoy nature
Put on boots
Pay special attention
Enjoy it all
Find the sign
Hunt the sign
To find turkeys
Be very observant
Pay careful attention
take everything in
Soak it up
Listen for turkeys
At fly up
Make a plan
Roosted ain't roasted
They are sly
Slipping around you
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wait, be patient
Cherish the chase
won't last long
If your lucky
Being prepared helps
Preparation is key
For successful results
Preparation and opportunity
Luck needs opportunity
Get out there
Effort breeds success
Succes breeds confidence
Confidence is contagious
Happiness is contagious
So is Calm
Before the storm
Batten down hatches
Rough season ahead
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Mother nature wins
Nature always wins
so does wife
Keep her happy
It's worth it
Love them now
More than ever
Time is short
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Live your life
Day by day
Keep it simple
Enjoy simple things
Take many pictures
Make great memories
With loved ones
Time goes fast
Enjoy every minute
Not promised tomorrow
Live for today
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do your best
In all things
visit your family
Whenever you can
Respect your elders
Be an example
For your kids
Take them hunting
teach gun safety
Always respect firearms
Keep them clean
Keep them lubricated
Safe working order
Pointed down range
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At all times
Finger off trigger
until shooting target
keep safety on
Always verify target
And what's behind
Know it's capability
Be responsible hunters
In the timber
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Like a rattler
cocked and ready
To strike you
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at any second
You'll never know
What hit you
until it's over
Its too late
Game is over
One and done
Try something new
Take up golf
Hit it straight
And very accurate
Stay in fairway
Watch for alligators
Out of water
Water is essential
For human survival
And plant growth
Nourishes our game
Our planet also
Spinning around sun
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One year rotation
Ready for Spring!
I need sunlight
And fresh air
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for my toes........
In the sand
Trap, oh crap
that's gotta hurt!
Catch and release
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Barbless hooks only
Release to grease
The frying pan
Fry cornbread too
Plenty of butter
And maple syrup
Little powder sugar
And hot sauce
with those fries
Add cheese whiz
Good eatin' boys!
Don't forget tums
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Plenty of water
Possible cardiac failure
Will go happy
That's very important
to be blessed
By your maker
Thank him everyday
I am blessed
In this day
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I give thanks
for our health
and our family
and our freedom
Lets go hunting
I'm in brother
For the ride
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To the end
Ole tom falls
To a crafty
Hunter in camo
With a 410
Sitting against tree
And the TSS
Using a wingbone
And the pot
for a gobble
I listen intently
Senses on alert
in the zone
Ever so still
Don't even blink
There he is
Wallet is lighter
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Buying every gadget
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That I can
to play with
Like a child
on Christmas morning
Opening their presents
Happy and content
until they break
They always do
Designed that way
For better performance
good old days
Much simpler times
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how we remember
Let's go back
To the basics
It's planned obsolescence
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Money is key
root of evil
Humans are weak
always looking for
Some instant gratification
Gobbling on the limb
Hens all around
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probably are screwed
probably are screwed
Because of cats
Coming back strong
Predators need killin'
I totally agree
Eat the cats?
Chinese food, gas
Poor little Fluffy
Wasn't fast enough
Never fast enough
neither are possums
Deer are dumb
Especially during rut
Best buck opportunity
Like ladies night
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Just no alcohol