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General Discussion => General Forum => Topic started by: sugarray on June 20, 2011, 12:05:09 AM

Title: Making decisions
Post by: sugarray on June 20, 2011, 12:05:09 AM
I have been wanting a new tattoo since my son was born.  My wife has resisted some, but since I have picked a font for the names of my children and the bible verse I want, she has really stepped up her protest.  I talked to a good friend yesterday and the advice he gave was "our decisions are not only about us".  So I decided to comprise and lose the verse.  As I tried to get my wife to help pick the exact location, she was really mad.  It took me about 3 hours, 2 hrs 59 mins and 59 secs too long, to finally realize what i needed to do.  There will not be another tattoo and I will cancel my appointment.  Just wanted to share my experience so maybe some young, newly married or new child, man will learn from my mistakes.  It is the others in our lives that make our life what it is.  My wife keeps my home running, my kids going, and gets me out of bed in the mornings.

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Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: VAHUNTER on June 20, 2011, 08:14:23 AM
sounds like a smart move 
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: wildturkey6 on June 20, 2011, 08:37:48 AM
After being married for 26 years I have come to the same conclusion Ray.We have to base our wants and needs on what two of us think and not be selfish enough to make bad decisions because we want something. By including your wife's wishes in that decision you have certainly strengthened the bond you have with her. That is the way to make your marriage last forever IMO. How ever if it were a turkey gun you were discussing buying you may have to take a little more time to convince her it is the right move. (joke). God bless you young man you are making the right decisions in life for your family.
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: guesswho on June 20, 2011, 09:32:52 AM
As long as its a two way street I have no problem traveling that road.
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: lightsoutcalls on June 20, 2011, 09:34:32 AM
Good choice.  If you like to read, pick up the book "Love and Respect" by Emerson Eggerichs.  This book reveals a very simple, but very profound approach to marriage and marriage difficulties.  This principle has been a real eye opener for me.
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: flintlock on June 20, 2011, 12:08:18 PM
Quote from: lightsoutcalls on June 20, 2011, 09:34:32 AM
Good choice.  If you like to read, pick up the book "Love and Respect" by Emerson Eggerichs.  This book reveals a very simple, but very profound approach to marriage and marriage difficulties.  This principle has been a real eye opener for me.

I 2nd the book!
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: OLE RASPY on June 20, 2011, 12:18:42 PM
I would've got the tattoo and told her the clothes and dishes better be washed by the time i got back.
























:TrainWreck1: :TooFunny: :TooFunny:






just kidding. :lol:   You did the right thing. :icon_thumright:
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: Tail Feathers on June 20, 2011, 12:57:20 PM
Respecting and considerng the feelings of your wife is a wise move.
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: anthonyjhallen on June 20, 2011, 02:12:05 PM
3rd the book.
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: socalturkeyman on June 20, 2011, 02:46:24 PM
Quote from: OLE RASPY on June 20, 2011, 12:18:42 PM
I would've got the tattoo and told her the clothes and dishes better be washed by the time i got back.

lol























:TrainWreck1: :TooFunny: :TooFunny:






just kidding. :lol:   You did the right thing. :icon_thumright:
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: vaturkey on June 20, 2011, 02:56:56 PM
Sugarray


I do understand your decision somewhat to keep peace & harmony in the household, but I really don't think it would be a mistake to honor your children with a tattoo of their names & a bible verse. Sounds like you already have one tattoo. I never was the tattoo type but I always appreciated beautiful art. When my son died 5 years ago , I got a tattoo as a tribute to him & I have never regretted it. Just my opinion .

  vaturkey   :newmascot:
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: savduck on June 20, 2011, 06:20:24 PM
As a married man with young children I say wise choice, but i also say you gained bargaining chips on something else later.  :icon_thumright:
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: Jay on June 20, 2011, 06:43:43 PM
Get the tatoo, and show her who's boss. Of course I've been divorced twice, so take that advice for what it's worth :TooFunny:
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: Shotgun on June 20, 2011, 09:54:14 PM
Where as I agree that giving in to the wife is not a bad move.  A strong negotiator never gives in with out getting something in return.  The price of a tat to could be close the price of an out state hunting trip  ;)
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: sugarray on June 21, 2011, 07:57:01 AM
I do have a plan . . .














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Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: drenalinld on June 21, 2011, 08:00:46 AM
You're a good man Ray. As a husband and father our wants and needs are secondary until SPRING!!!  DSD will be better in the Spring than a tat.
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: Preacher on June 21, 2011, 09:13:14 AM
I tell young couples all the time"  marriage is like a checking account in some ways,  if you are going to make withdrawls ,  you got make bigger deposits!"
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: vaturkey on June 21, 2011, 09:18:17 AM
Quote from: Preacher on June 21, 2011, 09:13:14 AM
I tell young couples all the time"  marriage is like a checking account in some ways,  if you are going to make withdrawls ,  you got make bigger deposits!"



  Well said Preacher !!     :icon_thumright:  :newmascot:
Title: Re: Making decisions
Post by: lightsoutcalls on June 21, 2011, 11:18:23 AM
To add to Preacher's comment, those deposits add up and often bear "interest". 

Just be cautious that you don't make decisions with the "return" being your primary focus.  I celebrated 24 years of marriage yesterday and have gained some insight along the way.  I can assure you it wasn't all a cake-walk!  That said, I'm looking forward to the next 24.

One little parting thought...

Disappointment is the result of unmet expectations.  Unmet expectations are most always based in selfishness or self-focused thought.