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General Discussion => General Forum => Topic started by: SinGin on July 19, 2017, 08:38:08 PM

Title: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: SinGin on July 19, 2017, 08:38:08 PM
So my youngest daughter (21) has her first real boyfriend. Well I was planning on doing all the usual dad stuff when I met him to scare the snot out of the youngster like cleaning my AK -47 and threatening with his life if he does anything wrong.
  Well my problem is she is dating a police officer fresh on the force and most of the stuff I was going to do to him or threaten him with he can actually arrest me for.
  Got any ideas that I can do to let him know that if he hurts my baby girl, I'll cut him?
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: akp on July 19, 2017, 08:58:58 PM
Why don't you shake his hand.
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: nsselle on July 19, 2017, 09:13:33 PM
easy easy, lol.
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: 3bailey3 on July 19, 2017, 09:17:12 PM
Make sure his body cam is working!
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: fountain2 on July 19, 2017, 09:29:21 PM
I'm pretty sure he knows this stuff already, and your daughter knows as well.  She will make the decision for you likely.   
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: Roost 1 on July 19, 2017, 09:38:06 PM
Jail would not keep me from letting him know my expectations of how my baby girl is to be treated..
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: Coop1082 on July 19, 2017, 09:51:03 PM
She should've dated a firefighter! Lol. Just kidding. Just jabbing at the ongoing smack talk we have between FFs (myself) and the PD in my city. It's honestly quite hilarious! That being said I just had a daughter of my own this past month, so I'm all eyes on what the recommendations are because in quite a few years I'll be in the same darn boat!
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: Tail Feathers on July 19, 2017, 09:52:06 PM
Tell him you're the president of the local BLM chapter and will call a riot if he doesn't treat her well.
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: mtns2hunt on July 19, 2017, 09:58:55 PM
Just tell him and your daughter your expectations in a very open manner. Cleaning a weapon to scare a boyfriend is extremely old fashioned and will not work. Never did with me and can bring about hard feelings in our current touchy world. Not to mention your daughter is 21 and will surely have her own opinions. IMHO.
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: Chris O on July 19, 2017, 10:01:56 PM
I would destroy a box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts in front of him to let him know you are one sick crazy person. :anim_25:
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: Greg Massey on July 19, 2017, 10:20:33 PM
I think it's best you leave him alone...Just be her dad and help them anyway you can in the future...in other words she 21 stay out of the way...i would say she has made a pretty good decision on choosing a police officer..just my opinion ...you never will want to stop protecting your daughter ...
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: Ihuntoldschool on July 19, 2017, 10:25:33 PM
You might try acting as if you have some sense.  Could work
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: Jbird22 on July 19, 2017, 10:32:07 PM
IMO, if she's waited til 21 to have her first real boyfriend I'd trust her judgment that she didn't wait this long to pick a bad apple. Like someone else said, shake his hand and give him a legit chance to make a first impression.
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: Will on July 19, 2017, 11:12:01 PM
Seems like you've already done your part to be sure she's cared for......sounded like she picked someone responsible and of good character.
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: SteelerFan on July 20, 2017, 12:00:14 AM
1st thing... remember when you were that age

2nd thing... FORGET when you were that age

3rd thing... I can name 100 worse scenarios, without trying. Congratulate them both! (and then find out if he has any good contacts, info, or property to hunt!!)

;D
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: compton30 on July 20, 2017, 04:34:21 AM
Try offering the guy a cold beer and being pleasant, if capable.
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: Chris O on July 20, 2017, 04:38:43 AM
I actually think that if she has waited this long to date that she might have a pretty good idea what she is looking for and has made a descent decision already.I am friends with a few cops and I have to give them crap about doughnuts all the time.
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: SinGin on July 20, 2017, 07:16:20 AM
All great ideas guys.. of course I will be plesent with the young lad, I just want to make sure to not get to comfortable too quickly and that what ever he might be thinking I always have my eyes on him.

Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: bbcoach on July 20, 2017, 07:24:09 AM
Be Honest and Upfront with him.  Let him know your Expectations.  This will ALWAYS be your little girl!  Don't forget about your daughter as well.  Let her know that she will always be your little girl but you respect her decisions.  Let her know that she can come to you if she has problems but don't expect it since she'll want to be an adult and handle it her way.  Give them both your support and pray to God that they both Love and honor one another.  Tough road ahead, been here twice.   
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: Tail Feathers on July 20, 2017, 08:28:59 AM
Quote from: SinGin on July 20, 2017, 07:16:20 AM
All great ideas guys.. of course I will be plesent with the young lad, I just want to make sure to not get to comfortable too quickly and that what ever he might be thinking I always have my eyes on him.
Well then you don't have to say a word.  Just leave a long range rifle out, along with a huge spotting scope and a note with his patrol car number on it where he can see it all. :TooFunny:

True story, I was cleaning my duck one afternoon when my middle daughter unexpectedly brought a suitor over.  I had reassembled the gun and was doing a final wipedown when she brought him in.  He wasn't intimidated.  In fact he commented rather excitedly "that's a Browning A-5!  My grandfather has one just like it.  Those shoot great!"
I kind of like that one, but she wound up with a better one a couple of years later.
Title: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: Happy on July 20, 2017, 11:29:46 AM
My 16 year old daughter has a boy she is dating. We have rules and obviously they are supervised at all times. If your daughter has made it to 21 before dating then be grateful and understand she is an adult now and there comes a point to where you have to trust their upbringing. Believe me it's sucks to see my little girl starting to grow up but it is part of life and I can say she seems to have chosen a pretty decent kid. Already signed up for the airforce and he has a plan for his life. It's going to happen to almost everyone that has a daughter and as a father I just want to see her with a fellow that loves her and respects her and will put her first. I am saving the scare tactics for the bums and ghetto wannabe's. Good luck and if he is a good fellow you may want to keep a good thing going. Not many decent fellows around these days.

Sent from my SM-G800R4 using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: GOOSESLAYER on July 20, 2017, 03:09:32 PM
trust your daughter and more importantly trust the way you raised her. If the guys becoming a cop he most likely has a good head on his shoulders to put his life on the line to protect. Get to know him then make judgment.
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: daddyduke on July 20, 2017, 04:57:45 PM
Next time he comes over have a bible study.
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: Old Gobbler on July 21, 2017, 08:38:09 AM


It could be worse she could be dating a Hillary Clinton supporter
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: renegade19 on July 21, 2017, 10:10:31 AM
Quote from: bbcoach on July 20, 2017, 07:24:09 AM
Be Honest and Upfront with him.  Let him know your Expectations.  This will ALWAYS be your little girl!  Don't forget about your daughter as well.  Let her know that she will always be your little girl but you respect her decisions.  Let her know that she can come to you if she has problems but don't expect it since she'll want to be an adult and handle it her way.  Give them both your support and pray to God that they both Love and honor one another.  Tough road ahead, been here twice.   

In a similar situation with a slightly younger daughter.  This is the way I handled it and it's been good so far.  I have had many discussions with my daughter in the past on how she should expect to be treated and I've also tried my butt off to set the example with how I treat her mother! 
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: pauld on July 25, 2017, 09:13:18 AM
Quote from: Old Gobbler on July 21, 2017, 08:38:09 AM


It could be worse she could be dating a Hillary Clinton supporter

I was going to aim for something along those lines too.

I've got a kid, much younger but... BUT... I keep to a simple principle. "These are my expectations and the teachings I have to give you. One day you will make your own decisions and face your own rewards and reprocussions, if you want my advise, I'll give it. If you don't want my advise then I will trust that I have done my job as a parent and instilled the values you need in you so that you will make wise and smart decisions. I cannot be with you all the time, though I will be there for you all the time. Don't disappoint yourself in your decisions. Grind hard, Work hard, Never give up."

We talk about it DAILY!
Title: Re: Got a big problem, need help
Post by: g8rvet on July 27, 2017, 12:56:56 PM
Honestly, not much you SAY is going to make much difference with your daughter or her beau.  It is much more about what you DO.  Treat her momma with love and respect.  Treat her with love a respect.  Don't be his pal.  He probably has pals.  Be cordial, but not too cordial at first. 

If he is really impressed with her, he will be a little nervous around you.  Grudgingly give him more and more respect as he earns it.  Sounds like you raised your daughter right and she will make good choices.  About all you can really hope for anyways.  Mine is 24 and knows her Daddy will help her with advice and in any way I can. Notice how he treats his mom.  That is a great clue with how he will treat his wife. 

Mine was over at our house with her boyfriend.  We had spent the day scalloping.  They had been living together about 1 year (dating about 3) and they were leaving after we had cleaned the boat and scallops.  I always walk anyone out of my house as they leave and I was standing on the porch as they were leaving.  I said "Love y'all" as they were getting in car. Did not mean to come out, in fact I did not even remember saying it when my daughter called me and told me her bf talked about nothing else on the way home.  When she told me I had said it, I said "Dangit, it just slipped out".  But looking back, I probably meant it.